Heartbreakers Page #6

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no later than tomorrow."

I try everything, but is

very political red tape...

to get green card,

and I am loophole less.

Well...

this is horrible.

And to think I was going

to ask you to marry me.

Marry you?

Yes, yes, I, uh...

purchased a ring

and everything.

But with your leaving...

I am but ignorant,

unintelligible foreigner...

but if you marry me,

I believe that puts, uh...

kibosh on deportation.

- Really?

- Yes.

Oh, Ulga...

Ulga...

Will you-

What? What?

- Marry me?

- Ohh...marry you?

Oh, is legal question.

Yes, I will, is binding answer.

Leave me alone.

I'm engaged!

We're talking a settlement

of 20 million minimum!

Oh, we're finally

set for life, Darling!

I just have time

for one quickwhoo!

- I said whoo.

- Why won't you talk to me?

There's nothing to say.

I scared you when I told you

I loved you, didn't I?

Jack, there is no love.

It's just a trick of

the brain...

a combination of

hormones and chemicals.

Then why are you here?

Tell me to my face

you don't love me.

I don't love you.

Wow, that was more believable

than I thought it would be.

Look, I know I freaked you out

by moving too fast...

with all that

"I love you" stuff.

So, let's just...

get married.

I gotta go.

Oh!

That is jarring.

My love, tonight

we will celebrate...

this ecstatic joining

of our spirits...

with the union...

of our aching bodies.

Oh, you have

stomach cramp again.

No, no, no. I ache

for you, my pumpkin.

- Let's hump.

- Oh, William, my religion!

- Humping is not yet allowed.

- Oh, of course it is.

I proposed, you accepted.

To God, everything

else is just paper work.

Oh, William, I insist

we wait till after wedding.

Ulga, I am much more

powerful than you.

Just relax and enjoy it.

Oh, always something

in your mouth.

Are you dead?

Why me?!

Oh, wake up,

you disgusting sh*t!

20 million.

- What?

- I need you here.

Wow.

That's real attractive.

We gotta get him out of here...

and make it look like

he died at his house, alone.

Room service.

Let's get him to the bedroom.

Ok...

too far.

Uh, balcony?

Oh, just-

just hold him.

I'll be right back.

Champagne and oysters.

All this just for you?

Oh, yes.

I mean, someone is joining me.

I'll open the champagne.

That's all right.

I'll take care of it.

Thank you.

It's, uh...

tip's included when

it's paid for, good night.

Aah!

I ask you to do

one simple thing.

Oh, I don't consider holding

a 500-pound corpse simple.

Ok, if you hadn't

flung open the door-

I didn't fling it!

Look, we just have to get

the body back to the house...

and everything will be fine.

Have you seen her?

Dean.

Sh*t!

Angela!

I'll meet you by Tensy

in 5 minutes.

- He looks really pissed.

- I'll handle him. Go!

Oh, god.

Angela, stop!

I have missed you

so much! So much!

I can't stop

thinking about you.

I've never been so

in love with anybody...

in my whole, entire life.

I'm begging you, please.

Please, just give me

one more chance.

One more chance.

Marry me again.

What?

Get up.

How'd you find me?

The title for

the Mercedes came through.

It listed this place

as your temporary address.

I drove straight through

just so I could see you.

Your hair's different.

It looks really pretty.

I like it.

Come here, give me a kiss.

No.

Oh, no. No, no, no.

Angela, I've changed.

I've totally changed.

Look, look, look.

This place is crawling

with prime trim.

I'm barely even noticing.

I...can't deal

with this right now.

No, no, no.

Angela, listen to me.

I'm not leaving without you.

I love you...

and I don't care

who hears it.

I love her. I love her.

I love her. I love her!

What do you want

me to do?

I- I'll sing.

You want me to sing?

Come fly with me

Come fly, come fly

Shut up!

What do you want, baby?

I'll do anything.

Anything?

I had no idea

you were into this stuff.

I've been trying a lot

of new things lately.

Oh, no, no.

Wait, wait.

I don't know about that.

Are you questioning me?

No. No, no, no. It's just-

Kiss my foot and apologize.

I'm sorry.

Good boy.

Ooh, yes.

Now, I'm just gonna

get some whipped cream.

I got no problem with that.

I'll be right back.

Hurry up.

Careful, we don't want

any more damage to the body.

Yeah.

Housekeeping!

You want your bed

turned down?

Housekeeping.

Look. I don't need anything.

Please, just get lost.

Lady!

You know,

I've been cleaning...

this room for 3 weeks,

and so far, no tip.

Fine. There's 20 bucks

in my pants over there.

20?

How about I sit

on your kinky face

for a while... while

you think about that.

OK, OK, OK. 50!

That's more like it.

Unbelievable.

Both of these

wallets yours?

Two wallets?

Untie me.

Now, that'll be another 20.

All right.

He's sleeping.

He wakes up having...

one of his famous

coughing fits...

flails around and falls

right onto the statue...

becoming penilely impaled.

That's believable, right?

I just really need

a shower.

Where's the penis?

It's still there.

It's just the rigor

mortis is gone...

so there's no wood.

Not his, the statue's.

Oh. It's still

in the car.

I'll get it.

There you go.

Oh, this is-

This is unbelievable.

Oh. Oh, God.

Oh, God.

You are so enormous.

OK.

Oh, God, please.

You gold-digging whore.

You're already working

someone else, huh?

Get off of her, a**hole.

Get off, a**hole.

- Don't shoot him, Dean.

- Why not?

Because he's already dead.

Oh, you are one sick slut.

I am not a sick slut.

One penis coming up, mom.

Wendy?

Uh, hello.

Mom?

You're her mother?

It's just a nickname.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my god.

You two played me.

Oh, no. No.

That whole marriage

was bullshit...

and this one you even offed!

We didn't off him.

He coughed himself

to death.

Yeah, right.

You let your

own daughter seduce me?

Do you have any idea...

how much therapy

you people need?

Look, Dean.

I don't blame you

for being upset.

We did an awful thing.

For the first time,

I feel really bad about it...

but maybe, despite

all this craziness...

there's still hope

for us after all?

There's more hope for you

and him than there is for us.

Dean, please

tell me it's OK.

I love you.

Forget it.

Fine!

Look. You brought

this on yourself.

- You cheated on me.

- You set me up to cheat!

We can't make a scumbag...

do anything a scumbag

wouldn't do anyway.

Shut up, junior slut.

Get over there.

You know, you two

got some brass balls...

in those panties,

I'll give you that.

In the few moments

you have left...

Ii want to see some begging

and some pleading.

Uh, Mom?

Dean, you got so many tells.

You are not the killing type.

Don't screw with me.

I'm on a fine edge here.

Don't!

See? No bullets.

Fine. So I'm not

that big on homicide...

but I could do worse.

I found all your I.D.s,

all your aliases...

and I'm gonna

get them to the cops...

when they start investigating

decomposing boy, here.

You two are gonna dry up

in some filthy lesbo lockdown...

with bad lighting!

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