Hoodwinked Too! Hood VS. Evil Page #3

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- What? Are you kidding?

- Me and her? Whoa!

Hop back here a second, Flippers.

You mean the both of us?

Granny never needed a partner,

and I don't either.

I guess she's right about that, maybe.

Red, you're not going anywhere

without backup.

And you, you need to shuffle

your wild-card antics

to the bottom of the deck.

No more stunts, no more cheap disguises.

You two are partners.

Get used to it.

All right, road trip!

Hey, I'm driving here!

Big City is home

to great shopping, dining,

and two professional sports teams:

the Golden Geese

of the National Enchantment League

and what was formerly

the Denver Nuggets.

- What are you doing?

- Reading about the big burg,

- in case we get a chance to sightsee.

- We're not here to sightsee.

- We're here to find Granny.

- Fine.

But you're missing out on a chance

to visit the Old Mother Hubbard Museum.

Largest collection of empty cupboards

in the world, which is weird.

OK, let's get something straight.

We're doing this operation by the book.

exactly the way Granny would,

plain and simple.

- I just had a book.

- Wrong book.

- Hey, it was a good book.

- All right, look...

Looky, looky, over here!

Hey, it's Kirk.

He's really hit the big time.

We should catch the show.

No. We are going to stay focused

and follow procedure.

- They won't expect that.

- Look, you two,

we are definitely not here to hang

around in loud, sleazy nightclubs,

listening to cheesy lounge singers.

# Hey, Ali Baba and a carpet ride

# I'm Jack and the magic beans

# I'm like Hansel and Gretel in

a candy house when you blow a kiss at me

# Every day's a mystery

and my wildest dreams come true

# Living in this fairy tale with you #

Great place. Love the fixtures.

- So, what's the plan, Hoodie?

- We talk to Jimmy 10-Strings.

He's one of Granny's regular informants.

If The Giant's behind

the stolen ingredients,

that harp will sing

in more ways than one.

- We need to...

- Ply him with my lupine charisma?

- Gotcha. I'm on it.

- Hold on! I'll do the talking.

Granny told me

how to handle guys like this.

The trick is not... Huh?

- Wolf?

- Go, Wolfie! Go, Wolfie!

Aah, stop that!

Will you two focus?

OK, OK! Just trying

to blend in with the crowd.

- Just stay here.

- This will end well.

I'll be at the bar.

Merci beaucoup,

and my personal favorite, danke schn.

- Hey, Jimmy 10-Strings.

- Sweetheart, I do autographs

- after the show, OK?

- I work with Granny,

- and I need you to do me a favor.

- For Granny? Anything!

I hear your boss has his goons stealing

turffle ingredients. What do you know?

What?! Well, I never.

I mean, who told you... OK, listen up.

A couple of days ago, I overheard

The Giant talking about a big order

for someone called... Uh-oh.

- I didn't tell her a thing.

- Get your hooves off me.

Tell the boss I told her nothing.

I should sing something nice

at her funeral.

- Tell 10-Strings

- Up there.

to limit his singing

to exclusively musical vocalizations,

or I shall be forced to tune his strings

- until they snap. Capisce?

- Got it, boss.

You, with the red hanky on her head.

Are you trying to play my harp?

You could end up singing

with the angels, playing my harp.

- Tell me about the witch.

- What witch? Which witch?

- Huh. Good one, boss.

- Did you just laugh at me?

Do I amuse you?

- Am I some sort of clown to you?

- No, I... I hate my job.

- Who are you?

- I'm your worst nightmare.

A Sister with a badge. And I'm onto you.

Excuse me. Did I just hear

your tiny, little voice correctly?

Did you just come into my house,

hassle my harp,

interrupt my dinner

and tell me my hands are dirty?!

I eat sandwiches bigger than you,

little girl!

Did someone say sandwiches?

'Cause I'll take one.

And I'll bet you'll take five.

Hundred, that is! 'Cause you're

a big boy. I said big boy, son.

Who the Mother Goose

is this supposed to be?

Phineas Newcastle McGee,

wealthy business tycoon.

Didn't we meet at the big convention?

MobCon, the mobsters' convention.

Wasn't that you?

the big conman convention.

Funniest thing. I show up, nobody there!

Empty building!

Guess I should've seen that coming.

We are gonna die.

I love this guy! This guy is hilarious!

You two, have some dinner with me.

Come here.

Hey, 10-Strings,

you know what I wanna hear.

You bet, big guy. Two, three, six.

# Shorty, Shorty

You best stay in the crib tonight

- # Shorty, Shorty

- # Yeah

# When the big man be hatin'

Don't be hesitatin'

- # Shorty best be out of sight

- We don't have time for this.

- Don't worry, I got the big gun here.

- What?

- Twitchy? Uh-oh.

- Distract The Giant. I'll get the harp.

I don't like most little people.

Hey, you know what?

- I like you.

- Little people. Can't trust 'em.

Hey, everybody's little to me. Right?

- Am I right?

- Yeah.

- Oh, Stanley.

- Please, Blanche. Not while I'm eating.

Jill, sweetheart!

Go fetch us another pail of water.

Sorry! Sorry. Excuse me, coming through.

Hey, that was good!

There is no proof

that I ever ate anybody!

# Shorty, get to steppin'

Your mama told you right

# Don't be coming 'round

the club tonight #

That's you, baby!

I'm not a dancer, I'm a singer.

Put me back! What's the matter with you?

This kind of thing

never happened to Dean!

- Well, this has been fun.

- Really, big, smelly, giant fun.

Hey, where you going? Come on, come on!

The night's still young, right?

Sorry. Love to stay, can't.

Gotta go. Early start tomorrow.

Yeah, I got my Pilates workout,

she's got a paper route.

- This is not how you steal a show!

- Hey!

Those skeevosos are trying

to put the bag on my harp!

Get after them!

You got the wrong guy.

Frank Jr. 's down the street.

Did anybody notice that the guy

I work for is an insane giant?

Put down the harp! He's under contract!

Now you've done it. He's mad!

We're dead.

- And I didn't even get my encore.

- Time to go!

And I still have 38 payments

left on myself.

- Yee-haw!

- What am I paying you pasty mooks for?

Get after them!

- Hey, do you get paid?

- Not really. No.

- Start singing, 10-Strings.

- Is this your first time doing this?

'Cause Granny just slips me 20 bucks.

I'll show those pipsqueaks

who's the big man around here!

Putting fingers on my property!

Like that Jack guy. I'm still picking

pieces of him out of my teeth!

I'll grind up their bones

to make my pasta fazool!

Tell us who The Giant's

getting ingredients for.

Yeah, well, you know The Giant is not

usually very happy about those

who spill his personal beans.

Maybe I could tell you something

about Goldilocks.

That is not her natural hair color.

- Really?

- I knew it!

- Just tell us who ordered the thefts.

- OK, OK already. I'll tell ya.

Every day The Giant gets a call

for a new ingredient from...

- ... from the Bunny.

- The Bunny?

- Not the Bunny! Not the Bunny!

- Yes, the Bunny.

He calls in the orders,

and that's all I know.

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