Kaalakaandi Page #3

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And if there was enough time

and not too much going on,

you'd be engaged?

I love him.

- You love him!

Yes.

Okay, why don't you decide

that after you go to America?

What the fu..

Sorry. Sorry, excuse me.

Where's the joint?

- What happened?

Cops. It's a raid.

- What?

Do you have anything on you?

- Oh, f***.

What?

- Are you guys clean?

Yes, we don't.. - I'm clean.

- What raid? - It's a drug bust.

Yes, we don't.. - I'm clean.

- What raid? - It's a drug bust.

So?

- So, we'll have to wait.

They'll check everyone.

- Then?

And then, they'll take us

to the police station.

Maybe the hospital afterwards.

- The hospital? - Blood tests.

How long is this going to take?

I don't know. With all these

people, it could go all night.

It can't take all night,

I'll miss my flight.

I need to get.. I can't be here.

- Okay, calm down.

You're stressing me out. - F*** it,

I told you I had to leave.

I knew it was going

to get hectic. - Relax.

I'm going to miss

my f***ing flight.

No, no, no, we'll figure..

- You figure.

Where are you going?

- I'm going to explain

the situation to them.

They can't just stop us.

Okay.

You do that.

I'll.. I'll just..

The chief is in the lobby.

Yes, sir.

Let me go.

- You called me a b*tch!

You called the police a b*tch?

You want to go?

Come with me, you slut!

Come with me!

'They'll forgive you.'

'They're your parents,

after all.'

'It happens in anger

sometimes.'

'But, every time..'

Just drop me, okay?

I'll get back on my own.

Just drop me, okay?

I'll get back on my own.

And your haircut?

- I'll get it done.

My friend is waiting, I have to go.

- Friend? Now?

The salon will close.

- It won't.

Just relax, okay?

Oh, yes!

What?

- This..

Is..

Fantastic!

- I'm not deaf!

Fantastic!

- I'm not deaf!

Oh, man!

I think it hit.

I think it hit. - What?

Why haven't I done this before?

My whole life

is such a waste!

I'm so stupid!

- Why are you yelling?

Who? I?

Because of the music.

The music!

It's really loud!

'Bhrishti Pore Tapur Tupur'.

- What?

That's Bengali for

'Bhrishti Pore Tapur Tupur'.

You speak Japanese?

- I didn't know.

What the f***

are you talking about?

Oh, hello!

Good evening! Hello!

How you are?

How you doing?

I'm sorry, I..

I don't know why I did that.

Good evening. - Good evening.

- What are you doing?

Let's go. I have to go.

- How much, baby? - What?

Hey, man!

Dangerous curves ahead!

No licky, no sucky,

no love you long time.

Only looky. - What?

- How much?

No hanky-panky, just to look.

- To look?

Get in the car now.

- Ground floor.

Southern hemisphere.

Your Australia.

Your Cape of Good Hope.

- What did he say?

I'm really curious

about your junk.

How much?

- Oh, sh*t, get in the car!

Get in the car now!

- Hey, Sheila.

What are you up to?

- Sir..

What's going on?

Nothing.

Nothing.

Just chatting.

- Really?

Let's chat at the station.

Why, man?

What did you say?

- Why, man?

Is chatting illegal?

Come, I'll tell you at the station.

Who'll take me to the station?

And anyway

you shouldn't strain yourself

during your pregnancy.

You! - Come on,

protector of the nation!

Move aside, you.

Angad Drive!

No one's going to the station.

Sir, I was just talking to him.

I didn't even do anything.

- Where will you go, you whore?

I'll deal with you later!

Move!

Your father's a whore,

that makes no sense.

You rascal!

I'm going to teach you a lesson!

Sir, let it go. He's drunk,

that's why he's blabbering.

Blabbering? - What are you doing?

I'll get screwed.

What'll you do, you pimp?

- Pimp?

Paste, go after him,

I'll handle this!

You'll handle this?

- Come on now.

"From morning, till the evening,

everything's been going wrong."

"I've got the swag.

I'll work things out."

Come on. Come.

Have you won even once

in the last four years?

Now even I feel bad about

taking your money.

Now even I feel bad about

taking your money.

What are we without hope, my man?

Come on.

100 bucks.

- What?

100 bucks.

Show.

Already?

I'm scared of you.

Heart's thumping?

- Yes, heart's thumping.

No, no, no, no..

You can't see my cards,

these are my moves.

Happy?

No worries.

You want to steal?

Steal with style.

Like you're doing something big.

You think small.

F***ing small.

We shouldn't even consider

anything below 10 million.

10?

- Not enough?

15?

We'll go to Mr. Raza.

Tell him we were attacked.

They took one bag,

we saved the rest.

Raza is a f***ing fool.

He'll buy that.

He's going to say

that he's not a f***ing fool.

He'll ask us where we got hit,

by who, all that crap.

But here's the beauty of this plan.

You'll have to take a bullet.

What?

Here, on the side. I'll be careful.

You rascal,

you're going to shoot me?

Not for real,

it'll just be a scratch.

Oh, man.

You were ready to lose

your head for 2.5 million.

You can't take a bullet for 10?

Just a little scratch.

It'll be nothing.

Mr. Raza will think,

he got shot.

He got shot!

This is serious.

There's a bag gone, no problem.

They risked their lives

and saved the rest.

And the respect is automatic.

That's a solid plan.

Now?

Now..

Listen.

Mr. Raza trusts us.

We can't betray him.

We're just joking around!

You made up a story,

I made up another.

That's all there is to it.

F***er, you were

yanking my chain?

F***er, you were

yanking my chain?

Bullets just got fired.

Where's my bill?

Are you okay?

The chief has called me

to the lobby.

Can I go?

'Make sure no one leaves

the hotel. Shut the gate. Over.'

'Tawde, keep an eye..'

This is nothing, babe.

The last time..

Where were we, honey?

That place in Juhu, with the

bad prawns, I got food poisoning..

I don't know.

- Anyway, the cops came in

they planted the drugs

and then they pretended

to find them.

What? What do you mean,

pretended to find them?

They found these big-ass

bags of coke..

Now who the f*** carries

around that much coke?

When you're using

this is how much coke you.

Babe!

What the hell is wrong with you?

You told me you were clean.

You think this is funny?

We could've gotten into

so much trouble.

Yes, nice toss there,

Harbhajan Singh.

I was just trying to protect us.

Oh, I feel very safe now.

Hey!

Hey!

Where are you?

I'm running!

Because there's a f***ing

cop chasing me, idiot!

The other one's gone after you!

Okay, bye!

'You'll be done for.'

Run.

How far will you run?

Where will you go?

Sooner or later

you'll be at the same corner,

you whore.

I won't let you go.

- Let me go?

Catch me first, you fat f***!

"Come to me.

I'm your love."

"Oh, my!

Your refusal is killing me!"

"Come to me.."

"Come to me.."

"Come to me.."

Sir, as you see,

I am just running in slow motion.

Watch me.

But you just can't catch me.

Slow motion, in reverse.

What's your price, sir?

Take this.

This.

And this.

Come on!

Actually, f*** you.

Madam, I'm out of time.

And you're out of options.

Driver, move it!

Welcome to this Air India flight.

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