Kicking & Screaming Page #8

---

Give it up, Dad!

It's a long game, sonny!

Hey, grab the pebble

from my hand, Grasshopper!

What?

Hey!

If it isn't fart-face Jones.

What's up,

farty pants?

Bring it on.

You can have

the first punch right here.

I could eat a box of cookies

for dinner if I want to.

What? Can you do that? No.

'Cause you're

a fart-face kid.

Oh, my God! No! Tigers!

Help me! Get him off me!

Get him, Logan.

Attaboy, Logan.

Ow! He's got my ear.

He's got my ear!

He's like a jackal from hell!

Italians with the ball.

And they pass it of

to little Byong Sun!

Pass it off! Pass it!

Do it! Shoot it,

Byong Sun. Shoot it!

No! No, no.

Oh! Weak kick!

Stolen away and

kicked way downfield.

Gladiators moving the ball.

Hunter, catch up!

Catch up.

They find Bucky Weston

in the open.

He shoots! Score!

Yes!

Gladiators tie the game.

Byong Sun!

What was that?

I thought

I had the shot.

You thought?

How many times do

I have to say this?

You can take as many shots

as you want during practice.

But never ever

in a game.

Especially not

the championship game.

Okay,

you cannot talk to him...

No, no, no.

Don't go there.

Take a seat.

Go ahead.

Ease up on him!

You ease up on that

corduroy jacket of yours.

Gladiators moving the ball.

Oh! Number 14 goes down.

Come on! That?

Good call, ref!

That's a bad call!

All right, coaches!

Coaches here, now!

God! That's a bad call,

you know it!

Hey, hey, hey.

That's a bad call!

Hey! Hey,

I'm warning you.

Let me ask you a question.

Let me ask a question.

How much you pay him

to make those calls?

You are one wisecrack away

from being thrown

out of this game.

I don't want to

get thrown out.

Can't a guy just be

enthusiastic about the game?

You can be

enthusiastic...

That's all I want to do.

...at a respectable level.

I just wanna have fun.

Now, go to

your places!

And keep your

comments to yourself.

Wow! What was

that all about?

Here's all I heard.

The ref said...

Then my Dad said...

Then the ref said...

Any more questions?

Hit the road. Move it.

Massimo with the ball,

trying to pass it

off to his brother.

Come on!

But Buck Weston has figured out

this Tiger offense.

Go!

Get back on defense!

What did I just say?

Bucky with another open shot.

Goal!

Yes!

Gladiators take the lead.

Was anyone listening?

The Italians have effectively

been shut down.

Great.

That's my boy!

That's the half.

Honey, wh-where have you been?

I called you twice.

What? Why isn't Sam

in his uniform?

So, how's it going?

It took me all morning

to convince him to come.

And the only reason he is here

is to support his team.

What, he doesn't

want to play for me?

He would love to

play for you

but you've turned

him into a benchwarmer.

Sound familiar?

Look, I just wanted

to get to

the championship game, that...

Well, you're here, Phil.

I'm not crying.

It's frustration.

Don't worry. You'll

be all right. Gonna be all right.

If you play the second half the

way you played the first half,

I'm gonna trade the whole team

to the Tigers next year.

Can I go in now?

I have fresh legs.

Philly, I can't.

It's the championship game,

all right?

Don't bother me, okay?

I didn't play

the week before, either.

I promise you, I'll

play you next season, okay?

You want to be Gladiators?

Yeah!

Let's say,

"We are Gladiators. "

We are Gladiators!

Say it again!

We are Gladiators!

Okay, go out in the second

half, I want you to stay focused.

You doing okay?

I know this is tough.

Hey, guys.

Sam, you think

I could talk to you?

I guess.

Honey, do you mind?

Sure.

So, I just

was thinking, uh...

You know, grown-ups

are always telling kids

how they mess up, right?

But the truth is

sometimes

grown-ups screw up

but we don't have anyone to

tell us when we do it.

I screwed up, Sam.

You think?

I just got caught up

in everything.

I really lost my way,

I mean,

I apologize.

I just wanna ask

you if you... if you can

find it in your heart

to forgive me

and you give me

a second chance,

I'd like to

make it up to you.

Okay.

You accept

my apology then?

Yeah.

Thanks, buddy.

All right. You're

starting the second half.

Really?

Yeah.

You're not worried

about losing the game?

No, I'm worried

about losing you.

I brought your uniform just in case.

So, go suit up.

All right.

Okay?

Good job.

Thanks.

Now, give me

that jacket.

Oh.

It's bad?

Horrible.

Okay.

Hey, guys.

Everyone take a seat,

if you would.

I have something important

I'd like to tell you. Um...

I just want you guys to know

that I know that I blew it.

I... I... I... I completely blew it.

And we should've just been

having fun all along

and honestly,

I don't know what happened.

And I owe you,

I owe all of you an apology.

I am very, very,

very, very sorry.

With a capital "S"

and a capital "ORRY."

You know what I mean.

You... You guys are great kids.

You're unique

with... with... with your own

strengths and talents,

and I should've

been promoting that.

Instead, I wasn't,

'cause I'm a lousy coach

and I didn't

teach you anything.

That's not true,

Dad.

What? What are you talking about?

He's a lousy coach.

He didn't teach me anything.

He tried to kill me.

He taught us exactly how

not to play soccer.

Actually, Sam's right.

That's exactly what I did.

We just need to

take the field

and you guys

just do e-e-exactly

the opposite of

everything I've taught you.

Does that make sense?

What have I... What have I

told you to do?

Always play the Italians.

Okay. There you go.

Gian Piero, Massimo,

we'll get some

fresh legs in there.

Give you guys a rest?

Rest?

Yeah.

Okay. Grazie.

Thanks.

Wh-What else

have I taught you?

Break people's clavicles.

Chop block.

Tattoos are cool!

Don't remember that one.

Coffee is the lifeblood

that fuels

the dreams of champions.

Right. Hold on.

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Way to go, Byong Sun!

All right. What else?

The most important

thing is winning.

No. No, no, no, no.

The most important thing

is... is having fun and

trying your best, all right?

So, let's get out there

and do everything

the opposite of

what I've taught you.

Sound like a plan?

Bring it in. Here we go.

Yes.

What are we gonna do?

Don't listen to Phil!

Take the field.

Here we go, guys. Have fun!

Down by one,

the Tigers have both Italians

sitting on the bench?

Odd move by

Coach Phil Weston.

Stop them, guys!

Goal, and the Tiger

goalie goes down hard!

Oh, my...

That's it.

That's the intensity I've

been looking for. That's it.

The Tiger goalie looks okay.

Hey, ref? Injury?

Time out?

Coach Weston is

taking no chances.

Time out.

Everyone with glasses.

Can I borrow your glasses?

Would you mind?

Thank you.

I appreciate that.

You look like

you need those.

Thank you.

Appreciate that.

You all right?

Yeah, I'm all right.

Just want to do a little

vision test here. All right?

Is that better

or worse?

Worse.

Better or worse?

Worse.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes