Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Page #4

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- Yes-

Hello?

Hello?

- I'll be goddamned.

- Jesus.

Don't blame yourself. Listen...

- ...sometimes these things just happen-

- For a reason.

For a reason? F*** that.

Why? Because I fall off a building,

...survive a bus crash?

Swell, they're enjoying Baltimore.

I'm lying here with my brains out.

I've been to Baltimore, you win.

Listen...

- ...I'm really sorry. I gotta go.

- Yeah.

I gotta go.

I have to go.

Genaros. Pure drinking pleasure.

I prefer Genaros.

But what do I know? I'm a bear.

I suck the heads off fish.

Genaros.

I was tired. I was pissed. I was wetter

than Drew Barrymore at a grunge club.

I needed a hot bath, a warm bed.

But the night had other plans for me.

- Oh, you did?

- I got the Cyber Agent.

- You got the Cyber Agent.

- It has all the cool weapons.

You got Protocop coming too.

It's gonna be worth more too

because I think he's, like, paralyzed now.

Son of a b*tch!

See, I forgot, old Johnny,

he always had two cases. Remember?

How are you?

Hey.

She's gone, Harry.

- Yeah.

- She's gone.

I know. Who?

Fact is, she stole not only

your credit card, but your ID.

We're very sorry about

the mix-up on our part.

So are you willing to positively identify

this woman as your-

- My sister! Yes!

- Your sister was here?

Oh, God!

God, we haven't spoken in years.

She's never forgiven me

for leaving her all alone.

- I'm just gonna get you a blanket.

- I don't want a blanket!

- But you're shivering.

- I don't care!

You're freaking me out.

Will you relax, okay?

- Oh, God.

- I'm so glad that you're okay...

...but now, I don't know, you're

making me more nervous. Sit down.

- Okay.

- Tell me what happened.

Yesterday, Jenna,

she got into my house, Harry.

She must have been broke,

I don't know.

She swiped 200 bucks, a credit card,

California ID, God knows what else.

- Right.

- Oh, God.

- No more lies, Harry.

- No.

No.

Are you a detective?

- Are you a detective?

- Who told you that?

Flicka. Flicka.

You know, my friend? She told me.

She told me you were a detective.

- If you are, then I really need your help.

- Well-

That's empty, honey.

Okay, I know this sounds crazy,

Harry, but listen. Okay. Okay.

- My sister's been living out here....

- Harmony's sister, dead. What the hell?

What was she even doing here?

The lady in the lake, now the sister.

This was two corpses in three hours.

Am I crazy? That's unusual, right?

Yeah, looking back,

I maybe should've told her...

...I wasn't really a nipple- Detective.

Detective. Sorry. I should've said

something, but she wouldn't shut up.

The card she stole from me

was maxed out.

Right before she died, she charged over

$2000 on it. That's weird, isn't it?

Sentron something.

Some bullshit company! Plus-

Red flag, Harry. She took her

birth control pill for the day.

Why would she even bother

with the pill, huh?

She was murdered, Harry.

She was murdered. She was murdered.

Honey, all right.

Relax, relax, relax. Okay, relax.

Are you gonna help me, Harry?

- I gotta check my schedule-

- If you're not gonna help me...

...I need to get out of here,

find someone that'll help me.

- I just gotta check my schedule.

- Can you help me?

If you're not gonna help me,

I need to find somebody else!

- My caseload is pretty-

- Oh, Harry, thank you.

Yuck, come on.

- It was nothing. I didn't do anything.

- What are you doing?

- I didn't do anything.

- You were grabbing my tit.

No, there was a spider.

There was a big spider.

- Oh, please, whatever.

- I swear to God.

Look, I'll find it. I'll find the thing.

Where are you? Fuzzy little b*tch.

- Whatever. It's okay, I believe you.

- Clearly, you don't.

Look, Harry, you grabbed my tit.

It's life, all right? It's no biggie.

No biggie? Guy grabs your tit,

"That's life, no biggie"?

I mean, what kind of talk is that?

No, you tell me. What kind of talk

is that? I can't believe you.

I can't believe that

that's the reaction that-

See there?

Yeah.

- I trust you.

- Right.

What is your problem? I'm letting you

off the hook. You didn't do anything.

No, but you thought I did.

Do you get it? I'm on the hook. The hook

is my home. Do you understand?

Listen to me. I grab your tit,

it's a f***ing biggie!

That came out wrong.

But what I'm saying is...

...you act like, "Oops, it's an okay lapse.

You know, everybody does it. "

What the f*** kind of guys

you hang out with here?

I mean, are you the kind of girl

who like, you know...?

Who what, Harry?

Who what?

Forget it.

I'm sorry, just relax.

Just get some rest, okay?

Okay, we'll start on your case

tomorrow. All right?

- Afternoon good?

- Whatever, Harry.

- I'm going.

- Okay.

- I'm taking some sweats, all right?

- Yeah, anything you want to borrow.

- I'll give them back.

- Yeah. Yeah, anything in the drawer.

If it's in the drawer, it's clean.

Night, Harry.

Harry?

This is....

- This is really great.

- Isn't it?

- I'm leaving.

- Yeah, some nice rest.

Bye.

F*** off-!

Say again? They gave her back?

Yes. She's in my shower.

I'm looking at her, for chrissake.

That's impossible.

They don't even know you.

You're right. The body can't be here.

This is all a dream. There's Elmo the elf.

- Shut up. How did they get in?

- I don't know.

How am I supposed to know?

Fire escape, maybe.

Okay, first things first. We gotta move

her somewhere. You got gloves?

- Excuse me?

- Gloves. Do you have gloves?

You have to move her. If it's a frame-up,

some a**hole's calling the cops on you.

Do this:
Wrap up the body

in a blanket, a sheet, anything.

- Okay, any particular kind of gloves?

- Yes, fawn.

Will you f***ing hurry?

- Perry?

- Yeah?

- I peed on it.

- What? You peed on what?

I peed on the corpse.

Can they do, like, an ID from that?

- I'm sorry, you peed on-?

- On the corpse. My question is-

No, my question. I get to go first.

Why in poo-perfect hell

would you pee on a corpse?

It's not like I did it for kicks.

You said this doesn't happen.

This is your fault!

Shut up and listen.

First, we have to wrap the body.

Second, you've got to find the gun.

- Say this with me, "Find the gun. "

- Find the gun.

Damn it, I threw it in the lake.

Not my gun, idiot. They dropped

the body on you, it's a frame-up.

Then they also have planted a gun,

trust me. Move it.

I'll be there in four minutes.

Caller specified room 714, some sort of

brawl or something. Violent.

Yeah, 714. Lockhart.

- Let me get you the key.

- Actually, it's not 714, it's 514.

I was just up there,

and it's really noisy.

- Let's get the key.

- Yep, pretty awful.

- Don't answer that.

- Yeah, duh.

- That it?

- No, that's the corpse...

...from the last guy who stayed here.

F*** off. Was there a gun?

Yeah, it's right here. Perry,

sons of b*tches made us, made me.

I'm in town for two days, they know

who I am and where to find me.

- That's impossible.

- Yeah, it's totally nuts. Back stairway.

I forgot to tell you, Harmony's alive.

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