Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Page #7

---

it'd be Toodles, and then Ta-Ta.

- It's very emasculating.

- Harry, that's them. Twelve o'clock.

You said it's a black guy

and a white guy?

You're right.

Get the plate, call the cops.

- Let me find a pen.

- No. Whatever. Watch the road.

Are we slowing down?

- No, I'm getting a pen.

- Are you following them? Better not be.

- Tell me you're not following them.

- I'm taking you to the hospital.

- Oh, sh*t. They're turning.

- What?

Holy sh*t.

Perry's stakeout. It's a setup. They're

going to MacArthur Park after Perry!

Wait a second! My finger's hanging off.

We gotta move on this.

We're gonna go save Perry,

really quickly.

Then we'll go fix your finger.

It'll be like, "Hey, Perry, look out. "

Boom, back in the car. All right?

- Cool?

- Yeah. This is exhausting.

Bingo. All right. All right, Harry.

Twelve o'clock, that's them.

One of them is on foot.

God, Harry. Sh*t, if I leave the keys,

can you take yourself to the hospital?

- Oh, yeah, sure.

- All right, good.

- I got the gun you gave me.

- You what?

Perry!

Now, where you going?

No, no, no. Don't fight it.

Let it happen, baby.

Perry!

Perry, watch out!

Goddamn it, turn around!

Son of a b*tch!

How about that, you f***ing animals!

Goddamn cocksuckers.

- Perry.

- Where the hell did you come from?

- He got away.

- It's okay. You did good.

- I couldn't shoot him, Perry. Oh, God.

- You did fine. You did fine.

We gotta go now.

Hello?

Anyone home?

Hello?

Anyone home?

I got an injury problem. Hello.

All right, first things first.

You've gotta ditch that car.

I know, I know. I've-

I know you said that there was

gonna be consequences, but f***.

I saw him shot to death.

- I was scared.

- Look, it's okay, yeah.

We can absolutely

talk about it, all right?

Thank you. Thank you so much.

It's nothing against your boss.

I'm grateful. I just-

I spoke to him.

You'll never have to go through anything

like that again.

I swear.

Promise?

Yep.

Who are you?

Who are you?

Who-?

Well, hey.

So you still here, huh, tough guy?

Oh, you got a gun, I see.

Well, damn, you are tough.

Sorry.

F***.

Hey. Hey!

Sit.

- Yeah? What?

- Where the hell are you?

I'm with one of the kidnappers. One of

them, anyhow. I shot him. He's dead.

Come here, you f***.

Wipe the place clean

and get out of there.

I want to, but I can't.

- So do it.

- My fingerprint's here. The dog's got it.

- No one's gonna dust the f***ing dog.

- He's got the finger, a**hole...

- ...with the print part.

- Get the finger, kill the dog, get out.

Hang on.

Sh*t. Well, I think....

I think we're safe.

Harry?

- Harry?

- Hey, Perry, I shot a guy.

I never did that before.

Harry, listen-

- link to the items found

in the Silver Lake home...

...to the kidnap-murder

of socialite Veronica Dexter.

Police theorize a falling out

between the kidnappers...

...resulting in at least two deaths,

and possibly a third tonight.

So this evening,

was it Johnny Gossamer enough for you?

To tell you the truth, Johnny Gossamer

always has a way bigger ending.

There's always the part

where the guy gets tortured.

Yeah, tortured, sure. Then he usually

breaks free and shoots, like, 16 guys.

Yeah, 16 guys. It's always 16.

That's funny.

So this thing, it's over, right? They say

the kidnappers are all dead, so....

Well, Harry, I'd be lying to you

if I didn't say...

...that I still didn't have

a few questions.

Harmony's sister.

If she stumbles on a murder plot,

why hire me to film it?

- Why not simply go to the police?

- Right. And I still think...

...this Veronica Dexter

father-daughter business is wanky.

So the whole reconcilement thing?

"Reconciliation," idiot.

She comes back to the States, drops

the lawsuit, moves in with her father.

- Suddenly they're inseparable?

- So, what are you saying?

We're gonna, like, probe deeper?

- Absolutely not.

- What?

What are you talking about?

My sister paid you.

- What, you're gonna bail?

- Harmony...

...do you want your sister's

money back? Done.

In the meantime, back off.

Before you get me and Harry killed.

Pardon me.

Hey, I lucked out.

They gave me the same room.

- Lucky you.

- It's pretty good. You wanna come up?

No, I don't wanna come up.

Why would I go up there?

- They cleaned it.

- The car is coming. I'm going. Jesus.

You know what, Harry? Stop.

Why'd you lie to me?

It was an excuse to stay around you.

So I think, in the realm of lies-

You are such a dumb-ass.

- I am so not who you think I am, Harry.

- And who would that be?

You think I'm- You think I'm amazing.

You do. You think I'm so amazing...

...because that's who

I told you I'd be.

Yeah, that was the game plan.

- You know what? It worked.

- No one else thinks so.

- My opinion doesn't count?

- No, it doesn't.

Because you're new here.

Look around,

there's younger and better.

I don't want younger and better,

I want you.

I'm such a moron. I'm sorry.

You know what-

- It doesn't matter, I'm going. Look, just-

- I'm such an idiot.

I steal sh*t.

- Come again?

- That's what I do for a living.

I steal audio-visual components.

I steal. I robbed a house.

I stole this watch.

It's a cool watch. It's got this

little light thing. I stole this gum...

...from the lobby,

because it was kind of a rush.

I've never finished anything

that I've started my entire life.

Not school, not marriage, nothing.

And I have this thing where,

like halfway in the middle, I just...

...and I cut and run.

Like the other night

when you were all over me...

...and you gave up

and just went for it with-

Prime example. I switched to the ugly

friend. Homely friend. She's not ugly.

She's homely.

Don't go. Please.

Not yet.

This isn't finished.

- Turn around.

- Why?

- Just turn around.

- What, my tag's out?

- This dump have a bar?

- Yeah.

- Call me "Slick" from here on out.

- That was such a good job.

You snagged a ton of gum.

- I mean, petty theft-

- Oh, Harry.

I really didn't need

that last shot of tequila.

Oh, God.

I just had a weird thought.

Veronica Dexter. I saw the body

up close. Hell, I carried the damn thing.

Both times, the dress was soaked

through, so it was transparent. So-

God, Harry,

where are you going with this?

No, no, no. It's just-

Perry said this chick was deep

into the born-again bit...

...so it's probably nothing,

but just if she had on underwear...

...I didn't see any.

- I guess I'm taking the couch.

- Yeah. Thanks.

Or you can sleep here.

But it would only be sleeping, Harry.

If that's gonna frustrate you.

Let's see.

Oh, Harry.

So long ago.

Didn't really turn out

the way we hoped, did it?

I guess if I racked my brain,

I could think of worse places to be.

- Is that so, Whitey?

- Whitey?

- Calling me a knight?

- Maybe, yeah.

Except for the boner.

That's not too knightly.

The hell it isn't.

Actually, it's nightly and most mornings.

F*** it, I'm not a knight. I'm sorry.

I'm thinking-

I'm going nuts, so I think maybe...

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes