Klovn Forever Page #5

---

F***...

It's just sad to find out like this.

To have to read the book

to understand -

- how much our friendship means.

That's pathetic.

I've been a giant a**hole.

This ridiculous ego circus stops now!

- I get it now, man!

- Did you just read it?

I've been reading it for the past

six hours! I'm so embarrassed!

Will you accept my apology?

Come here!

I'm sorry, Frank.

You and I... we'll get through this.

Why aren't you wearing any pants?

Why's your ass hanging out, Frank?

- I just patted your naked ass.

- I was putting on sun lotion.

Frank, we don't show our naked asses.

If the neighbors find out, they'll sue.

- I was about to put them back on.

- Right now. Hey, Cille!

Morning.

Good morning, Frank.

- Stop, you two...

- What's going on?

- Nothing, Cille.

- Don't look. He has no pants on.

I love you both. You're my family.

This is it.

This little cosy nook we're in here,

that's my family.

Without you, I'd be dead. I would

kill myself if I couldn't trust you two.

I love you.

I love you.

Go put on some pants, Frank.

- And sun lotion on your scalp.

- I'll just take a quick shower.

We arrive at the lobster house in...

Hang on, sweetie.

Do you remember the guy who owned it?

We have to do a follow-up!

We've experienced tons of stuff!

It's Isla!

- Hey, Casper.

- How are you doing today?

- I brought your ball back.

- Hey. Good to see you.

I know you had a party last night.

It's all good...

But somebody was having sex outside

between your house and mine really loud.

I could hear them. I thought a coyote

was getting killed or something.

- I thought you should know...

- Say hi.

- Oh, yeah, I'm sorry. Nice to meet you.

- I really liked you in 'Shopaholic'.

- I'm just gonna go for a minute, Dad.

- It was nice meeting you. Take care.

Actually, it was her.

I recognize her voice.

- What are you saying?

- I'm sorry. That's who was having sex.

- I heard her. I know the voice.

- Are you sure?

I'm an actor. I do an American accent.

I can hear accents.

- That is who was having sex.

- And the man?

- Could you recognize it...

- Definitely. Of course! Yes!

- I'm so sorry.

- Hold on.

Frank! We have a situation. Talk to Isla

for two minutes. This is an emergency.

I'm really sorry. I feel like

I came over and ruined your day.

Just hang on for two minutes.

Cille!

I think I just caused

a major family drama.

But what can I do? I totally heard her

having sex. She was very loud.

And I've got kids. It's illegal.

It's indecent exposure.

My daughter, can you imagine, she's six.

She can hear it. It's disgusting!

Would you ever do something like that?

Have sex at a party in a public place?

It's criminal misdemeanor.

I'm Isla, by the way.

- What's your name?

- Frank.

Frank. Well it must be nice

to see Casper. Do you miss him?

Where are you... okay.

This view is amazing.

We've got the same view actually.

If you come across to...

Are you going in?

Do you want me to take your hat

or your glasses or something?

- Lovely!

- Nice to meet you, Frank!

- See you.

- See you.

Tell Casper I had to go.

He's so weird.

Frank. I just talked to Cille.

She f***ing admitted everything.

I'm furious!

Wanna hear something disgusting?

She says... and this is verbatim:

"Dad, I shagged someone over 40."

At my party! The pig! It's illegal!

Straight to prison with that guy.

- It's not illegal to be over 40.

- Yes, if you f*** a 20-year-old!

- Do you see why I'm out of my mind?!

- Sure!

What are you doing?

Are you packing?

Mia called.

There's news about my blog.

- Blog?

- It's taking off. I should...

There's no plane until tomorrow.

So calm down.

Top Gun, Zipper, all the rappers

actually, are out. They're too young.

- Let it go, Casper. Just...

- No way! I'll never let it go.

Who do you think it is?

Did you sense anything yesterday?

Did you see anything, Frank?

- A shot in the dark...

- Go!

Battle Cat.

Frank, let me be brutally honest.

If it's Battle cat...

- He's that age...

- Yes, yes, I hear you.

But he's a close friend.

- Hoyt!

- It's not Hoyt.

I know that.

Hoyt!

- Sir?

- Listen to me carefully.

You're fired.

I want you out of my house. I will

not accept what you did to my friend.

- I'm tired. I'm off to bed.

- Frank, before you go.

I'm sending Cille home. This area

is crawling with sex offenders!

You'll have to take her home.

I already booked the flight.

I called Christopher in Denmark.

Everything's been arranged.

You sit together. Comfort her.

You're the only one I can trust!

I want her home and safe.

This country's too dangerous.

This can't get out, Cille.

Mia would leave me.

And I'd never see Casper again.

We have to put a lid on it.

Agreed?

Cille!

What?

We have

to put a lid on what happened.

- Frank, chill.

- No, I...

Frank, stop!

It doesn't matter!

Just stop it.

- Hi! There he is.

- Dad!

Isn't that your wife?

- Hi!

- Hi.

- Hi, sweetie!

- Hi, welcome home.

It's so good to see you.

Hi.

- What a surprise!

- How nice that you came!

I remember when you were...

When did we look after her?

- You wanted to sleep in our bed.

- That won't do anymore, Frank.

- No... Shall we get going?

- Yes.

- Take care.

- See you, Frank.

Yeah... bye.

You have a text from Cille.

She says she hasn't gotten her period.

Why would she write that to you?

- I don't know.

- Look.

- Well?

- I have no clue.

- Is she pregnant?

- I don't know.

What?

In the States,

there were times when she...

...confided in me,

because she couldn't talk to Casper.

So you became her confidante?

Yes. Uhm...

I think I'll give her a call, honey.

It may be serious.

Hi, Cille. This is Frank.

I just got your text.

Hang on...

What, honey?

Hang on, Cille.

I'm back.

We can't panic!

We keep each other updated.

You and me. No one else.

Okay. Yes, bye.

- Hi!

- So?

She was so happy I called.

You've all done great,

so we'll take a short break -

- with free play for a few minutes.

Let the water carry the child.

- You f***ed Cille.

- What? No! Never!

That is the most insane accusation!

Frank, you f***ed Cille

at the Great Dane party.

Okay.

And my reaction is: Mia needs to know

that we can't trust you.

- She doesn't have to know that.

- Oh, but she does.

Of course she should know

that her hubby is f***ing my daughter.

- Casper, you don't have to tell anyone.

- Then you have to do something else.

Then we'll

have to find another solution.

- What do you want?

- You f***ed Cille.

Ergo, I'll f*** Mia.

This is how it's gonna go down.

You check into a hotel.

You blindfold her.

And then I stick it to her

and f*** her.

- I doubt she's interested in that.

- This is about you and me.

- That's just how it'll be.

- What are we talking about...

- Or I could tell Mia everything!

- No, no! We'll work something out.

It's just a question of how long.

A minute? 60 seconds.

- That's a long time!

- No, it isn't, Frank.

- Yes, it is. One minute?!

- 40 seconds?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes