Looney, Looney, Looney Bugs Bunny Movie, The Page #3

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Oh, that's just it, lad. You certainly did.

Didn't he, O'Hara?

All right. All right already.

Does the defendant have anything to say

before I pronounce sentence?

One moment. I want to present

to the court a writ of habeas corpus...

...a writ of corpus delicti

and a writ of ad nauseam...

...charging that my client is deprived

of his rights of ipso facto...

...Iux et veritas

and e pluribus unum.

And I insist on his immediate release...

...under the precedence

set by Section 8, Paragraph 95...

...of Rogers v. Semper Fidelis.

Case dismissed.

Thank you.

[ROCKY CHUCKLES]

NARRATOR:
It wasn't long before Rocky

was up to his old tricks again.

[ALARM RlNGlNG]

All right, Mugsy, step on the gas.

Come back here, dimwit.

Wait for me, stupid. Stop.

NARRATOR:
Agent Mess lost track

of Rocky's new hideout.

Then an event took place

that aroused his interest.

[HEN CLUCKlNG]

Jumping juniper, what's all the rumpus?

[HENS CLUCKlNG]

Jumping juniper, a golden egg.

Twenty-four-karat solid gold.

I'm rich. I'm rich.

Who's responsible? Who's responsible?

Who did this?

Uh, I know who it was. It was me.

But I'm no fool.

I know what happened to the goose

that laid the golden egg.

Well, come on now, don't be bashful.

Who did it?

Oh, I know who did it.

He did it.

[HENS CLUCKlNG]

Okay, so I laid an egg.

ROCKY:

"Worth a fortune to owner."

Hey, that's better

than the numbers racket.

Hey, boys.

We're going in the poultry business.

NARRATOR:
Agent Mess figured that

this was just the sort of inducement...

... that would lure Rocky out of hiding.

But- But- But I don't wanna sell him.

They talked me into it.

Say, what's going on around here?

What's the big idea?

All right, duck, make with a golden egg.

Egg, shmeg, I can't lay no egg.

I said, lay an egg, duck.

Oh, heh-heh, well, you see,

I can't lay no egg just anywhere.

I'm an artist.

I've gotta have atmosphere,

beautiful surroundings.

Yeah?

Okay, boys, make with the atmosphere.

Now, this is more like it.

Cut it.

All right, duck, about that egg.

Oh, yeah, the egg.

A little later on, possibly.

I'm not in the mood right now.

- Nick.

- Okay, boss.

[DAFFY PANTlNG]

It was ghastly.

The deck just seemed to lift up

under my feet.

Then I was in the water.

Black oily water.

I struggled.

Okay, duck, no more stalling, see.

You got just five minutes

to lay that egg or:

[lMlTATES GUNSHOTS]

Well, I'll see what I can do,

but I gotta have privacy.

I never lay eggs in public.

Okay, duck.

But remember...

...five minutes.

Four minutes.

[THUD]

[KNOCKlNG ON DOOR]

Your laundry, sir.

Three minutes.

[CLOCK TlCKlNG]

Two minutes.

[CLOCK TlCKlNG]

[CLOCK CHlMlNG]

No egg?

[GULPS]

Uh-uh.

ROCKY:

So long, pal.

[STAMMERlNG]

[GUNSHOT]

Huh?

That just goes to show you...

...you don't know what you can do

till you got a gun against your head.

Well, toodles. See you around.

Just a minute, duck.

Fill them up.

[WHlSTLE BLOWS]

[COPS CHATTERlNG]

[DAFFY PANTlNG]

COP 1:

We had you pegged all the time.

COP 2:

Thought you could get away with it, eh?

Is there anything

we can get for you, old chap?

Yes, get me a proctologist right away.

NARRATOR:

The headlines proclaimed...

...a loophole in the law

had freed Rocky again.

BUGS:
Extra, read all about it:

Tweety Bird missing.

Bird gets the bird.

Read all about it: Million-dollar bird gone.

NARRATOR:
Mess swore Sylvester in

as a special agent...

... to snoop around the back alleys

of the underworld...

... for signs of the missing Tweety.

Oh, ow! Ooh, ooh! Ow! Ooh, ooh!

MAN [ON RADlO]:

Police authorities believe...

... Tweety Bird is being held for ransom

by the notorious Rocky and his gang.

And if you are listening to

this broadcast, Rocky, remember:

[lN HlGH-PlTCHED VOlCE]

Don 't hurt the bird.

- T urn that off, Nick.

- Okay, Rocky, anything you say.

Those bad old gangsters.

Nasty old kidnappers.

I wonder where someone would

go about hiding a kidnapped bird.

[TWEETlNG]

Say, that must be

the missing kidnappee...

...and where there's a kidnappee,

the kidnappers must be close by.

Oh, goody, goody.

Look at that nice pussycat

trying to save me.

Hey, boss, I thought I saw a pussycat.

You did, you did see a pussycat.

[CRASH]

I slipped.

Oh! Oh, there you are, p*ssy.

Oh, hide me, hide me, quick.

Here, hide here.

They'll never find you in here.

Oh, thank you.

Not so hard.

NlCK:

Hey, Rocky, the bird's gone.

He must be out here some place.

Okay, pussycat, where is it, the bird?

Oh, yeah?

Search the pussycat, Nick.

NlCK:

Okay, boss.

[SYLVESTER YELLlNG]

SYLVESTER:

No.

Okay, bird, the jig is up.

Hey, boss, this is all I could find.

Okay, cat, get your package and scram.

[EXPLOSlON]

You dirty guys.

[SlRENS WAlLlNG]

COP:

Okay, Rocky, open up now. We gotcha.

Cheese it, the cops. Hide the bird, quick.

[BANGlNG ON DOOR]

COP:
All right, Rocky,

down to the station house with you.

PHOTOGRAPHER:

Hold it.

We are gathered here today

to pay homage to this magnificent cat...

...who fought his natural instincts

to save this little bird. Yes.

And now, gentlemen, you may take your

pictures of the cat kissing the little bird.

Come on, cat, kiss the little birdie.

Come on, pussycat, kiss the little birdie.

Oh, he's a bad pussycat.

NARRATOR:

On October 28...

...Agent Mess slapped the handcuffs

on Rocky and Mugsy...

...and brought them to justice.

They were sentenced to 20 years

of hard labor...

... which was a little tough

on Agent Mess...

... who was never able to find the keys

to his handcuffs.

BUGS:

Ah, this is Hollywood, city of winners.

Winners of Oscars, Emmys

and Grammys.

Friz Freleng won five Academy Awards

and two Emmys.

Me? I got a carrot.

When I complained to Friz, he said,

"Don 't bother me. I'm creating. "

So he created the Oswald Awards

just for us cartoon actors.

Now, tonight, you 're gonna witness

this exciting event.

Hello, greetings and hi.

Heh-heh. T onight l' m going to interview

some of these cartoony celebrities.

That is, if I can find one.

Here's one now, even as I speak.

It's that little stinker Pep Le Pew...

...the greatest lover to ever appear

on the silver screen.

And off the screen too, n'est pas?

Say something to your fans,

Mr. Pep Le-

P- yew!

Gee. Heh-heh.

Boy, I must say, meeting you has been

a breathtaking experience.

[CROWD APPLAUDlNG]

Well, look who's here.

It's Parker Pig.

The name's Porky Pig.

DOG:

Who's your friends?

The three-

Two little pigs plus one.

- Show biz folks, huh?

- No, they're build-

They're contractors.

- I built my house of straw.

- I built my house of sticks.

I built my house of bricks.

I must say, looks like

you're all living high on the hog.

[LAUGHlNG]

Little pig joke there.

Don't I know you?

Now, don't tell me.

Let me see, I'll get it, I'll get it.

- It's Big Bad, Big Bad-

- Wolf.

No, no, no. I don't believe it was "Wolf."

Half the sound. It may end with an F,

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