Made Of Honor Page #4

Did you see that?

"Made of Honor"?

That's fun stuff!

But you're a guy!

Go ahead...

Just get it out.

So, what did you say?

- Did you say yes?

- No!

- No?

- I didn't know what to say. I told her I'd think about it.

You need to think about wether your

dress is gonna make your ass look big!

- Give me a break, come on!

- Okay. Alright, let me think.

- Is she really in to this guy?

- You should have seen them.

Staring at him all moony

like he shits unicorns.

That's not good, man.

I'm thinking you're gonna have to do this.

You're gonna have to be

the Maid of Honer.

- What?

- Yeah, I'm serious. Think about it,

this will give you an excuse to be

around Hannah all the time.

Helping her out, being

"the man behind the curtain"...

You'll be her confident.

And you can use that time to point

out to Hannah that this is really crazy.

- And that she doesn't even know this guy at all!

- No, I'm not gonna do that. No way.

- What?

- No.

Look, I don't know what your

other options are.

You got a better chance of stopping

this wedding,

from "inside"

than from another continent.

And they say that you can

shorten this and wear it again, if you like.

Come on man. If you're serious and you

really want Hanna back from this guy,

You're gonna have to

do whatever it takes.

Whatever.

- The dress is beautiful.

- Thank you!

- I am so happy you're gonna do this!

- My pleasure.

For this wedding, I am willing

to do what ever it takes.

- I'm so excited!

- Yeah, me too!

So let me tell you who the

other bridesmaids are gonna be.

- Okay!

- Okay. Stephanie...

- Stephanie, great.

- And she loves you!

- Good!

- And my friend Hillary, from camp.

Hillary, I don't know Hillary.

- She's the best

- Okay.

- And Melissa.

- Oh, no!

- I had to, Tom, she's my cousin.

- No, she hates me!

- Well, you broke her heart.

- She broke my nose.

- It was an accident.

- She hit me with her fist!

I was completely honest with her.

I said:
"Look, nothing serious".

And she agreed.

So sometimes our hearts don't

match our mouths.

That's good, you should

put that in your vowes.

And, she's been wanting to be my

maid of honor since we were 5 years old,

so now she's really gonna

hate you.

Here they are now.

Okay. Well as your Maid of Honor,

I promise to keep the peace.

Oh, hi!

Yes! The bride to be!

- Hello, you must be Tom.

- And you must be Hillary.

You look gorgeous.

Stephanie, how are you doing?

So good to see you.

- Are you kidding!

- It's you, Melissa.

Look at that...

- This was great.

- This isn't akward...

Go on.

I'm gonna be fine.

- Tom, have you met Colin yet?

- Yes.

- Isn't he dreamy?

- Absolutely.

Could someone please pass

me the Splenda?

Could someone who's not a masogenist,

please pass the Splenda?

- Hallo?

- Thank you, Stephanie.

It's Colin, you guys.

Hi, babe!

Just a sec... Hi!

So cute!

We only have 9 days before

we leave for Scotland,

- so we have to act quickly.

- Excactly.

I've been a "MOH" 6 times,

so I'll organize everything

that needs to be done, even though

I'm not officially the "MOH" here.

- What is a "MOH"?

- M-O-H.

Maid Of Honor.

- Yes!

- Oh, yes. That's clever.

No, it's going great.

Very smoothly.

So we got the bridal shower

bachorlerette, dress fittings,

- The "kilt"...

- I'll do the "kilt".

- Okay... perfect.

- Okay.

Shopping for Hannah's true self...

- That's gonna be great.

- So, what is Hannah's true self?

It's lingerie. For her

wedding night.

How do you expect to be a good

"MOH" if you don't even know that.

- She's talking to me.

- No, I didn't!.

- You just did.

- Oh, I'm sorry, Tom.

Did I break a rule?

How about we focus on the

wedding part?

- Good idea.

- Just for now...

Okay, I need, dress sizes.

- I'm a four.

- Okay.

- Eight.

- Sorry?.

You know, Hillary...

Do you think that maybe you'd just be more

- confortable in like a, twelve?

- No, it will be fine.

- I'm doing the Dr. Riverbed fast.

- Oh, yeah!

- Yeah.

- What is that?

Water, peachraisin/aplepect in shark extract,

And Lowry's Seasoning Salt.

- What about food?

- Look,

I'm going to look amazing in that dress,

I am going to meet a Scottish man, and...

I'm gonna be happy!

Write down an eight!

Got it.

What's your dress size,

Made Of Honor?

I don't know. What's your jock

size, Melissa?

That's enough! Enough!

Sorry. But will you guys

look at Hannah, please.

She's happy, finally.

So please, for Hannah,

let's all just get along,

put a smile on our faces

and pretend everything's perfect!

- Here she comes.

- Okay. Fine.

- What did he say?

- He's so sweet!

Isn't that great?

How's it going?

- Good, really good.

- Fantastic.

- And it's pretty much done.

- Perfect, really?

- Tom.

- Yes?

- Here.

- What is this?

She does bridal shower entertainment.

And I hired her for Stephanie's sisters shower,

and Hannah loved it. She reads Tarot

cards and stuff.

That's great.

Thank you, Melissa.

I'm not doing it for you,

I'm doing it for Hannah.

Okay.

Thank you, for Hannah.

It should have been me...

- I'll talk with you tommorow.

- Okay.

- Bye, Tom.

- Goodbye.

- Bye, Hillary.

- Nice meeting you.

You too, bye.

I just had a very nice

bonding moment with Melissa.

- Can I ask you a favor?

- Sure.

My mother and grandmother are

coming in to town tomorrow,

And I have so much to plan...

I was wondering if you and the boys could

entertain Colin for the day.

- Entertain him?

- Yeah, just kind of get to know him and stuff.

- Sure.

- Cool.

So are you more proud of

"Scotch Tape" or McDonald's?

I think they're both american.

- So wait, you invited this guy to play ball with us?

- Yeah, he's the competition.

I need to get to know his

strengths and weaknesses.

I like his green shirts.

Is that like a poly blend kind of thing?

Yeah, it's my shirt

- It's your shirt?

- Yeah.

- Looks good on him, huh?

- Yeah, real good.

Why don't you play with him?

Thanks.

Colin, have you ever played

basketball before?

We would call this "netball",

back in Scotland, it's more of a woman's game,

so, no I don't have much

experience.

- Hi, I do. Need one more?

- We're good.

Alright.

- Alright, "girls", you ready?

- Yeah, I am.

Oh.

Use your hands.

- You alright there?

- Yeah, I'm fine.

- I'm open. I'm open.

- Here we go.

You gotta hold on to the ball, man!

Hold on to the ball.

Homos! Homos!

Homos.

Let's get the scottish girl

out if the tree.

You wanna start a game cause

you didn't get that.

There you go.

Open. Open.

Here you go. That was good.

Good.

Good.

Amiga.

Shoot it. Guys.

- I like it!

- I'm sorry.

- Come on!

- Get on the path.

You ok?

Ok, basket.

Put it in the basket! Put it in the basket!

- You know what I'm learning?

The guy's a chump.

Yeah.

- Wow, "Fault".

- There it is. That's it.

That's it! That's it!

We got it now.

Hey, I look good now, don't I?

Here we go.

Put it in the basket!

- In the basket!

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