Magic Mike Page #7

Thanks, man.

Heh, you know, if you ever want to go

in on a pack with me....

Mike's not interested,

but we can go halfsies.

l could make it worth your while.

Yeah, sure.

[TOBlAS LAUGHS]

-l'll talk to you later about it, okay?

-Yeah.

ADAM:

Who is that?

MlKE:

Nora.

l don't think you need that in your life, bro.

Heh, hey, baby girl, what are you doing?

Huh?

No, l'm at, uh-- l don't know, l'm at this party.

lt's getting lame.

l want to get out of here.

How about l, uh, come scoop you up?

l can bring you a present.

What?

-What thing?

DALLAS:
Boom!

l got a thing.

Come on, you ain't--

All right.

Okay. All right, l'll call you later.

This is Herman.

ADAM:

Hi, Herman.

He likes you.

KEN:

Hey, y'all. lt's all right.

ADAM:

Hey, man.

NORA:

We'd like to order.

KEN:

All right.

[KEN CLEARS THROAT]

-That pig is so f***ing cute.

WOMAN:
Heh.

KEN:

Angels or demons?

NORA:
Angels.

KEN:
Angels. Okay.

KEN:
lf you chew it, it'll hit you quicker.

WOMAN:
Heh.

KEN:
You're gonna f***ing love this one.

ADAM:
Yeah.

Yeah, f***ing Miami, man.

Heh, f***ing Miami.

[ADAM SlGH]

[KEN SlGHS]

KEN:

How you kids doing tonight?

WOMAN:

That storm is crazy, huh?

KEN:
Beautiful.

NORA:
Mmm....

[SlGHS]

KEN:

My wife's tits are awesome, right?

ADAM:

What?

KEN:

l said my wife's tits are awesome.

Yeah.

Check them out, man.

ADAM:
You f***ing joking?

-l'm not f***ing joking. Check them out.

Feel them. They're so f***ing, heh, amazing.

[KEN'S WlFE CHUCKLES]

Come on.

[CHUCKLES]

KEN:

lt's okay. Go ahead, man.

-They're real, l swear.

ADAM:
Yeah, l bet they are.

[CHUCKLES]

See?

-Heh.

-This is okay?

lt's okay with me, man. She loves it.

ADAM:

l f***ing love you.

No, man, l love you.

ADAM:
You don't understand.

-l love you.

No, l f***ing....

l f***ing love you, man.

KEN:
l love you, man.

You're such a f***ing special soul.

ADAM:

l love you.

KEN'S WlFE:

l love you too.

[TYPlNG ON KEYBOARD]

[ADAM WHlSTLES]

[CAR HORN HONKlNG]

MlKE:

ls she even home?

ADAM:

Brooke!

MlKE:

Hi.

ADAM:

What do you think?

BROOKE:

ls it yours?

ADAM:

ls it mine? F***, yeah, it's mine.

BROOKE:

lt's very you.

Come on. Let's go.

We're going to celebrate.

Come on.

-Come on.

-Come on.

Come on. Come here. Come on.

-Are you calling me like a dog?

MlKE:
What, huh?

-Are you calling me like a dog?

ADAM:
Who did that?

You want me to say something to him?

-Ha, ha.

MlKE:
l'll say something to him.

-Okay, so l've seen the stripping.

-Yup.

Tell me about being an entrepreneur.

lt's "entrepreneur" actually. lt's, uh, French.

You know about the roofing,

and l got a mobile-detailing thing.

But the whole endgame is the custom

furniture business l'm trying to start.

Custom furniture? So you must be really

good with your hands.

-l did not say that.

-Yes, l did.

But l'm glad you made that point.

lt's very insightful, actually.

-That's a lot of stuff.

-Yes, it is.

lf you could wake up and do the one thing

that would make you the happiest....

-The happiest?

-Yeah, money aside.

l would wake up on the beach somewhere

just making stuff every day.

-Really?

-Yeah.

Really? Tables and chairs,

that kind of thing?

Anything. Everything.

But custom, one-of-a-kind stuff.

Not the knock-off stuff you see

in people's kitchens from time to time.

Hey. l don't have

a custom furniture-maker man.

-Well, now you do.

-Okay? Heh.

-So are you in business? Why aren't you?

-Heh.

l will be as soon as the banks start making

the competitive rates and loans.

Look, l've been saving for six years.

Why do you think l'm doing

all these stupid businesses...

...and the stripping? l've saved about 1 3

grand. lt's gonna happen eventually.

-Wow, 1 3. That's a lot of ones.

-Heh.

There were some fives in there.

No 20s?

You don't want to know

what l have to do for 20s.

-l don't.

-Let's drink these and l'll show you.

-BROOKE:
No, that's okay, heh.

MlKE:
Heh.

So, Miami, huh?

Mm-hm.

-Don't be mad.

-l'm not mad.

l'm not trying to tell him what to do.

l just don't like it.

Did you just...? l want to clear something up.

Did you just take my advice?

By not telling him what to do?

No. l just don't have a choice.

-l think that was something l said to you.

-What, you want some credit?

-Are we fighting?

-Ha, ha.

ls this our first fight?

Come on. Let's make up.

-l don't like being mad at you.

-Look at that face.

-l really don't like being mad at you.

-You guys are going to have fun in Miami.

[CHUCKLES]

Just try not to forget

about the normal people.

Like the people who exist in the daylight.

The non-vampires.

-So you're not a vampire?

-No, l'm not a vampire.

Well, this is not going to work out

at all between you and l.

[BROOKE LAUGHS]

-A thing for vampires, heh?

-Yeah. Got a bit of a thing.

You want to get something to eat

sometime?

l don't know, just like get some food?

What do you mean, like a date?

No. lf you don't want to call it that, no.

l don't know.

Why? Because of what's-his-name

that moved to Orlando?

Paul?

-Yeah. Paul and l are figuring things out.

-Hmm.

How's that going, heh?

-Are you going to weigh in on that too?

-No.

Plus, l don't exactly sport-f***

my brother's stripper friends.

l'm sorry, who said anything about that?

l was just talking about talking

and being friends.

lf you want to talk,

my door is always open, Mike.

ADAM:

Are you trying to hit on my sister?

MlKE:
No. l'm sorry, and if l was,

what the hell are you going to do about it?

Whoa, brother.

[ADAM LAUGHS]

-Not me. Her.

BROOKE:
Heh.

Oh, my God. Come on, let's do one more.

One more, come on.

Dude, l would love to, but we can't.

You get Dallas' text?

We got a sorority in like a half hour.

BROOKE:

A sorority?

Five hundred bones to rub our nuts...

-...on some girl's chest.

-Adam, l see what's happening here.

MlKE:
l ate a Kappa just like this.

l ate a Kappa. l ate a Kappa.

You guys are really.... Have a great time.

MlKE:

Come on. We gotta stop fighting like this.

BROOKE:
Heh.

MlKE:
We gotta stop fighting.

Just find your own way back.

l got the keys, right?

You do not have the keys.

Oh, sh*t, you do.

BROOKE:
l have the keys.

MlKE:
She's got the keys. We got to go.

[POP MUSlC PLAYlNG ON SPEAKERS]

MlKE:
Good evening. You live here?

KlM:
Yeah.

-Yeah? What's your name?

-Kim.

Kim, can you move back for me, please?

We keep getting complaints

of noise and underage drinking.

Gentlemen? Everybody's 21 here?

l might need to check some lDs,

unfortunately.

Can you accompany me in here, please?

Ladies, everybody's 21 here?

-Yeah.

-Yes?

She is definitely not 21 ,

l'm sorry. What's your birthday?

SORORlTY GlRL:

Uh, May 20th, 1 9....

That's what l thought. Put your hands

on the wall. Everybody sit.

We're going to be here for a while.

Can you please spread your legs for me,

ma'am?

You don't have anything sharp on you

that l can stick myself with, do you?

SORORlTY GlRL:
No.

-Good.

Because l do.

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