Mancation Page #7

Break it off.

- What the hell happened to you?

- Shut up. That's a gay shirt.

- # When we met that summer... #

- It's not gay.

# New kids on the block

had a bunch of hits #

# Chinese food

makes me sick #

# And i think it's fly

when girls stop by #

# For the summer,

for the summer #

# I like girls that wear

abercrombie & fitch #

# I'd take her

if i had one wish #

# But she's been gone

since that summer #

# Since that summer

# Hip-Hop marmalade,

spic and span #

# Met you one summer

and it all began #

# You're the best girl

that i ever did see #

# The great larry bird,

jersey 33 #

# When you take a sip,

you buzz like a hornet #

# Billy shakespeare wrote

a whole bunch of sonnets #

# Call me willy whistle,

'cause i can't speak, baby #

# Something in your eyes

really drove me crazy #

# Now i can't forget you

and it makes me mad #

# Left one day

and never came back #

# Stayed all summer

then went back home #

# Macaulay culkin

wasn't home alone #

# Fell deep in love,

but now we ain't speaking #

# Michael j. Fox was

alex p. Keaton #

# When i met you,

i said my name was rich #

# You look like a girl

from abercrombie & fitch #

# New kids on the block

had a bunch of hits #

# Chinese food

makes me sick #

# And i think it's fly

when girls stop by #

# For the summer,

for the summer #

# I like girls that wear

abercrombie & fitch #

# I'd take her

if i had one wish #

# But she's been gone

since that summer #

# Since that summer

# Cherry pez,

cold crush, rockstar boogie #

# Used to hate school,

so i had to play hooky #

# Always been hip

to the b-Boy style #

# Known to act wild

and make a girl smile #

# Love new edition

and the "candy girl" #

# Remind me of you

because you rock my world #

# You come from georgia

where the peaches grow #

# They drink lemonade

and speak real slow #

# You love hip-Hop

and rock 'n' roll #

# Dad took off when

you were four years old #

# There was a good man

named paul revere #

- # I feel much better...

- That is me! I know!

This is me!

I need her!

# I like the way you laugh

when i tell a joke #

# When i met you,

i said my name was rich #

# You look like a girl

from abercrombie & fitch #

# New kids on the block

had a bunch... #

- Where are we going next?

- Uh, flower show.

Sorry, it sounded like

you just said "flower show. "

Yeah. There's gonna

be tons of ladies there.

Yeah, I'm not going

to a flower show.

Adam, vince is right. The

place will be filled with women.

It can't be that bad.

Come on.

No, leo, it can be awful.

I would rather have my balls

caught in a food processor.

Now you.

Point out a place

You'd rather have my balls caught

in lieu of attending a flower show.

- Car door.

- Ooh.

Head of the class.

Now if you two ladies are

insistent on attending

The dried-Up hausfrau convention,

then by all means, have at it.

Vince wants to go where he

wants to go, so let's just go.

No, brady.

Vince, i love you.

I'm afraid this is where

we part ways, all right?

The sun is setting!

We're in a. C!

The sluts are about to

start roaming the street

And leo and i are going to

be there to calm their nerves

After a long,

hard day of arguing

With the financial-Aid office

of their community college,

Fighting with their step-Dad or whatever

the f*** it is they're gonna talk about

That we're gonna pretend to

listen to so they can justify

To themselves that

"these guys are different

From the ones i let

slip it in me last week.

They're not gonna talk me

into an angry blumpkin.

They're not gonna trick me

with the hairy houdini.

And text it to all my contacts.

No no no, these guys are different.

They're special.

I think they'll call back.

I have a good feeling

about these guys. "

What the hell are

you talking about?

Let's go, leo.

Enjoy the flower show,

b*tches.

- Hi.

- Hello.

I'm looking for this girl.

Have you seen her?

This is so easy. This is

obviously you in the picture.

- Yeah yeah, that's me.

- There you are... I found you!

# Yeah

# Oh yeah.

Okay, i get the idea that you do

whatever the hell you feel like

Without regard to anyone else,

but ditching my brother like that

Just makes you

a terrible friend.

All right, look look, he

needs his friends right now.

- He'll be fine.

- How do you know, adam?

Because he's got thick skin.

I should know.

I've ridiculed and belittled

him for years to toughen him up.

- Mm-Hmm. - You reynolds boys

have been coddled way too much

- And you're soft.

- I'm not soft.

You're a pushover,

all right?

You're gonna be forced to marry

a fatty because no attractive girl

Is gonna find this lack

of a backbone appealing.

Oh my god! See?

Before he was forced to toughen up

from having friends who are bastards.

You can't just

justify the idea

That you're allowed

to act like a fool and...

I don't know... Call it... What is

it, tough love or some bullsugar?

No no, you're missing the whole point.

It's not just about being an a**hole.

It's about being able

to walk into a room...

Any room... And knowing that

you're not afraid to be an a**hole,

Piss people off,

do something shocking,

Say something f***ed up. That's

what makes great men great.

- Uh-Huh. - It's like

when george washington

Once famously punched

a man in the dick

Just 'cause he made fun

of his wooden teeth.

That never happened.

I think i know a thing or two

about colonel washington.

Nothing you are

ever going to say

Is ever going

to make me believe you.

Huh? Ever.

Yeah, you're right.

- Yeah.

- What?

Talk is cheap.

Come with me.

What, a... A tattoo?

Okay, big deal.

What are you thinking?

A little butterfly

on your ankle?

Or maybe a scary skull?

How about that?

He's cute.

Dude, what are you doing?

There's, like,

tuna for sale over there

And you're just smelling

cactuses and tulips.

Look, would you just relax

with the getting-Me-Laid thing?

No no, I'm not gonna relax

about you getting laid.

It's very crucial that you do this,

because that whole sham marriage...

You need to just get

your mind off of it,

Get you laid and you'll

have a great time.

Dude, what is

your problem?

All trip you've been

holding stuff back, okay?

Help me help you.

Talk to me.

Okay.

Rebecca.

I don't know

what her name is.

- She's probably... Hopefully deep throat.

- No no.

- Rebecca.

- From high school?

Yes, my friend rebecca.

- The florist?

- Yes, rebecca.

Go ahead. Tell me

she's a soul-Sucking harpy

Like the rest of the girls in

the world whose sole purpose is

To rip out my heart with her

razor-Sharp talons or whatever.

Dude, what? No.

Actually, she's a sweetheart,

And i think you guys were

kinda meant for each other.

Hey, does she have

facebook?

Um, uh, yeah, i...

How about

a dragon fighting a tiger

On top of a mountain?

That'd be fun.

Or we could even

do like the unicorn

Running on a rainbow.

Or how about a pentagram, like

on your shoulder or something?

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