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Meet the Parents Page #6
Yes. Later, they'll collect
rainfall and make a tiny birdbath.
That's great.
lt's beautiful. What is it?
lt's an altar.
Or you might call it a chuppah?
lsn't that sweet? Wow.
l'll take it to the Byrnes'
and tomorrow Robert and Deborah
will meet beneath it
to become man and wife.
And later, when they purchase a home,
maybe it'll grace their garden.
Well, that's my...
sappy, romantic idea.
lt must have taken forever to build.
Not too bad.
About 70 hours, which isn't bad,
considering l carved it by hand
from one piece of wood.
(Jack) 'Hey, Kevo! 12:15.
Time to start the barbecue.'
OK, Mr B.
l better get back to playing host.
You guys grab your suits
and l'll meet you at the pool.
l'm gonna pass on the swimming.
You can't!
l don't even have a suit.
(Jack) 'Pamcake,
Pop's got your suit out here.'
- Coming, Dad.
- You gotta get going.
Gosh, she's great. Congratulations.
Thank you. And by the way, she had
the nicest things to say about you.
Really?
- Yeah.
- Hm.
Gosh, yeah,
we had some good times together.
Whoo, she is a tomcat!
Whew! So, let me hook you up
with some trunks, Gregor.
- l'm not gonna swim...
- l'm not taking no for an answer.
(Kevin ) Cold buffet's on the left,
wine and champagne on the right.
Yeah, that'd be grea...
Hey, there he is! Get out here.
(Wolf whistle )
G-man, we got salmon,
we got swordfish. What'll it be?
Uh...how about a little of both...
K-dog... l'm pretty hungry.
l think they call that the munchies.
(Bob ) Let's go.
Come on, Kev. Serve it up!
Damn!
Come on, team. He's got nothing!
Service!
- Nice serve, pal.
- All right!
Whoa, yes!
Get it!
Come on!
- Nice shot, Maverick!
- Sweet setup, lceman!
(Larry ) Nice one, Nurse!
- Glen, don't be afraid of the ball.
- lt's Greg.
Huddle up, team.
Not Glen. Greg is afraid of the ball.
This is unacceptable!
Here's what we gotta do.
- (Kevin ) Let's go!
- We're getting creamed.
lf Florence Nightingale
played some defence...
- Larry, l missed one shot.
- lt was a big shot!
Larry, keep floating. Denny, go deep.
Greg, nobody's
expecting much from you
so if l set you up can you spike it?
Yeah, l'd have to be pretty high.
- l bet you would, Panama Red.
- (Larry sniggers )
- All right, look sharp.
- Let's play ball!
Come on!
Let's go! Come on!
You got to spike those, Focker!
You got to spike.
Look how Bob did it.
Thanks.
Fire it up, Focker!
- Let's do it! Good shot!
- Way to go, Deb!
Greg!
(Roaring in slow motion )
- What's the matter with you?
- lt's only a game!
(Debbie wailing)
My eye! Oh, my eye!
- (Jack) Pam, help your sister.
- l'm sorry, Deb.
You can see "Voight"
backwards on your forehead.
Denny!
You the bandleader?
Go over song selection with Bob. Bob!
- Are you a Mr Focker?
- Yes.
- OK, sign here, please.
- Thank you.
Hey, your suitcase.
You made sure it's all there?
Yeah, it's fine. What's up?
Just want to make sure you're OK
since hitting that spike.
- l'm really sorry about that.
- That's OK.
l don't know what
got into me, lceman.
- lceman?
- Sorry, is it special for you two?
- No, Greg. Stop it.
- Stop what, lceman?
Top Gun was a very popular movie
when we dated. That's it.
Hey, lceman,
l have no problem with that.
Do you wanna be Maverick?
ls that what this is about?
l can't be, Kevin's Maverick.
No, he used to be,
but we can change that.
Can he be Goose?
No, because Goose dies in the end.
lt's very sad.
- Honey, l don't...
- Greg, shut up.
OK.
Dad! You ever think of knocking?
Not in my own den.
What are you two doing?
This is Greg's room, Dad.
Not now - it's storage. Greg's in
Deb's room and she'll bunk with you.
- Fine. Come on, Greg.
- l'll be right up.
- Oh, good. They found your suitcase.
- Yeah.
l don't know
what happened at the tux shop
but if l gave you
the wrong impression
regarding Pam in any way,
l'm sorry, OK?
l have the best intentions with Pam.
Actually,
there's something in my suitcase
that l plan to give her
that l think, um,
symbolises...
(Jack banging about)
..the level of my commitment to her.
And l wouldn't feel right
asking her to wear it
without her father's
permission... Jack?
Did you flush this toilet?
Maybe... You know what?
Maybe Jinx flushed it.
l saw Jinxy come in last night
and squat and relieve himself.
Jinx knows not to use that toilet.
lf he did, he'd never flush it.
What does it matter?
The matter, Greg RN, is when
this toilet is flushed, it runs.
With a near-full septic tank
you could have a problem.
Mr Byrnes?
(Man ) This is not part
of my job description.
Nice stench.
Really on a roll there, bud.
Bite me, Denny.
ln 20 hours there's a wedding here,
so l need my cesspool pumped now.
Not tomorrow, now!
Dad, what's going on? Oh, my God.
What's that smell?.
That smell, Bob, is our sh*t.
Focker made the septic tank overflow.
Jack, l told you it wasn't me.
lt was Jinx.
Focker, l'm not gonna tell you again!
He's a cat, for Christ's sakes!
He doesn't have thumbs, Focker!
- Hey, look at this!
- Kevo!
Over by the tree, right?
No, no, not on the lawn.
Stay where you are!
- Not on the lawn!
- Kevin!
No, no!
(All) No!
- Oh!
- No, no!
What the heck?
# l got my mojo working
# Just won't work on you
# l got my mojo working
# Just won't work on you... #
Oh, no!
That's what l said l wanted
cos it is a black Samsonite suitcase.
But, you think that
it's possible that Samsonite,
a profit, made more than one?
- 'l don't think so, sir.'
- Really, you don't? Hey!
Jinxy, stop.
l know l signed for it...
Don't tell me... What?
Do me a favour.
Can l talk to your supervisor?
- Hmm? What's your name?
- 'Joy.'
- Get me your supervisor.
- 'He's on a break.'
When he gets back,
have him give me a call, OK?
lt's a very important bag.
(Meow )
Jinx!
Don't ask me what for,
l just need you to do this thing.
l'm in a time situation
so just do it.
- 'OK. Greg Focker?'
- Greg or Gregory. Run both names.
Psst! Jinx! Psst, psst!
Come on! No! Jinx, come here! Jinxy!
Mew, mew, mew.
No! No! Jinx! Sh*t!
Greg didn't ace his med school
Boards. He never even took the MCATs.
Oh, Jack, that's what you had
What this poor boy did
on some test scores?
l bet he doesn't
have a real nursing degree.
A lot of these hospital workers
are pill poppers looking for 'ludes.
We know he's been puffing
the magic dragon.
l knew the little cracker was lying.
Jinxy! Come here.
Come here, little Jinxy.
Oh.
(Meow )
# l won't hurt you #
The fact is, Greg lied to you.
He did not lie to me, Dad!
You should know the truth. l love you
too much to see you get hurt.
l don't care what
your information says,
Greg took the MCATs, OK?
(Phone )
- (Man speaking Thai)
- (Speaking Thai)
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"Meet the Parents" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/meet_the_parents_13591>.
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