My Fellow Americans Page #6

Let's hear your version, Gershwin.

"No?" I sang mine.

You're an idiot.

CNN's set up near the park.

Maybe you should put this on.

Not so fast, Carl.

Slow down.

I don't like people running faster

than I do. It makes me look poky.

Sorry.

Lakers? I thought

we were sold in Los Angeles.

You cut back on disaster relief.

Too fast again.

I don't want to wear this

I'm a Houston fan

Hey, a hat.

Kaye Griffin called today.

She's ready to report that Douglas

and Kramer have disappeared...

...and are working to expose a cover-up.

I'll look into it.

You better. I want those idiots

found before they dig any deeper.

What are you doing?

I needed a cup of coffee.

Good. Did you get me one?

You cheap bastard.

I only had 50 cents.

Give me a sip.

Yeah, I'm about to share coffee with

the Washington love machine. No dice.

You could spit in a petri dish

and start a whole civilization.

- Here, want to lick the lid?

- Screw,you.

Give me that.

Decaf, you p*ssy.

I must go find a john.

Agent Wilkerson.

We have a reason to believe

your life is in danger.

We must transfer you out of the area.

"Aye, Macarena!"

If you could just step out

of the car-

Jesus!

Hurry up!

Get in!

Did we get collision coverage?

- Why?

- Nothing.

- Look out!

- Hold on!

Get it out.

I'm trying.

I can't see! Get it out!

Go!

- Nice going, Mario.

- Shut up.

That way!

Oh, not good.

Come on, let's go.

- Now what?

- Just blend in

How are you?

President Kramer?

President Douglas?

This is amazing.

We march in these all the time

My Lord and Taylor!

What are you doing?

Are you coming out?

No, no. I've always

supported gay rights.

I'm not coming out. He is.

Closet case. Sad

You talking about me?

Don't hide who you really are.

Be brave Here.

Don't hide who you really are.

Be brave. Here

it's a freedom-ring necklace.

Wear it with pride.

Come here

What's wrong?

I don't think you can help.

Unless you and your ruby slippers

can get us to Cuyahoga Falls.

I have some friends who might help.

After that bike ride, I'm changing

my position on an important issue.

I think the military can definitely

use some of those gals.

Now is this impressive or what?

Research room is down that way.

Wait a minute.

Oh, my. Oh, my.

How about this?

Oh, you got to be kidding.

Our dreams are like our children.

Don't you fall into the trap.

Democrats are full of crap.

Anything you really like,

I can get it for you at cost.

I feel dirty.

Have you found it yet?

Working on it.

You never got this.

I was Time's Man of the Year.

So was Hitler.

Not twice.

Here it is.

"Chef's log:
October 14th,

lunch, Oval Office...

"... President Kramer

and Charles Reynolds.

"Ham-and-cheese omelettes.

$6.95 each. " What...?

Where's Haney?

He isn't here.

They must've fixed this book too.

They knew we were coming.

Where's your gun?

I have it.

In my coat.

Get that light.

Great job, Douglas. Oh, God, it's Ben.

Hurry up with the ice.

Excuse me! I don't know my way

... around Kramer World.

Lucky for you we came along

when we did. You were in a bad way.

I can't say I recall that ever

happening before...

...a book just falling off

a shelf like that.

Is there any way someone

could have broken in here?

No, sir. Not on my shift.

I just remembered. A young lady

gave me an envelope for you.

Told me to be sure you got it.

She said she was a friend

from Washington.

What is this?

"Dear Mr. President:

My name is Kathleen Taylor.

"I'm Charles Reynolds' secretary.

"Mr. Reynolds has disappeared.

I don't know who to turn to.

"The last people he spoke with

were you, President Douglas...

...and Carl Witnaur. "

Haney's chief of staff.

That son of a b*tch.

He lives outside of D.C.

in Chevy Chase.

I was there recently for a dinner.

My God, did he put on a spread!

Those little chicken livers wrapped...

...with bacon on tooth picks-

And the dip for the broccoli...

Could you focus, please!

I'm sorry. Look, if we left...

If we left now, we could

get there by early morning.

We need to borrow your car, okay?

Do I have a choice?

Then it's okay.

Honey, you're hurting me.

Better her than me, Carl.

This is Douglas. I'm with Kramer

and a gun's pressed to your head.

Well, I'm assuming that's your head.

This is unbelievable.

How dare you?

Witnaur, we'll ask this just once.

What is Olympia and who is behind it?

I don't know what you talking about.

I'm glad to see you.

it's good to see you too, Joe.

We could use a little help out here.

Wait a minute.

Is that President Kramer holding

a gun on a naked guy in a blindfold?

Come on in.

Carl, my CIA buddies were clueless

about what you're up to...

...but they gave me something for this.

So, my boy...

...hope this goes well,

it's all new to me.

I'm not even sure

about the dosage but...

...what do you say we wing it?

You don't scare me.

I'm not trying to.

We don't want to see this.

Right. Enjoy the ride.

Damn vein.

it's wanting to jump around.

There it is, you bugger.

There it is.

I'll talk.

I'll talk... I like to talk.

it's amazing.

Haney needed to spin-dry the kickback

money. That's how Olympia came in.

It was a front company.

I never ordered anyone to kill you.

But you ordered the cover-up.

The appointment log

at the NationaI Archives...

...the book in your library...

All that was done at my request.

What about Charlie Reynolds?

Were you in charge to take care of him?

No, I never ordered anyone to kill him.

Who said he was dead?

Look, Tanner.

I'm telling you, it was Tanner.

This guy is out of control.

That's a lot of bull!

You're saying a rogue agent

turned hitman in your ranks?

I don't believe it.

You had Tanner put us on that chopper

and you pushed the button!

Chopper?

What chopper?

Looks like Tanner's been getting

his orders from Haney.

- What do we do?

- You got a few options.

You can go to the White House

and tell Haney what you know.

To get to him you must go

through Tanner, who'll kill you.

- What's the other one?

- You got a confession on tape.

Go to the press.

I'll call Kaye and by noon Washington

will be up to its knees in Olympia.

Call her?

You're doing the smart thing.

Damn!

Damn!

What?

If we go public,

there'll be another cover-up.

Witnaur might pay a price but

the big fish's going to get away.

Are we willing to let that happen?

We've done enough already.

No, I made a career of doing enough.

I always did just enough

not to piss anybody off...

...'cause a pissed-off person

won't vote for you.

it's a part of the game.

Tell that to Wayne and Jenny

and their kids living in their car.

"I'm sorry things are tough.

"I've been playing the game. "

I can't play it anymore.

- I'm going to see Haney.

- Hold on, Rambo.

Joe said you can't get past Tanner.

I don't care. I'm going.

You're a damn fool.

You're probably right.

But you know something, somewhere

out there there's another fool.

Some idealist sucker

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