Not Suitable for Children Page #4

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There's so much more out there in life.

Do you actually believe that?

The last time I saw my mum

she told me she was happy

because she brought

me and Claire into the world.

She said in the end,

that's all that mattered to her.

I want that.

Hey, can you grab him?

Shh!

F***.

I hope you're not offended

that I'm even asking you.

I just remember you saying something

about donor sperm if you got near 40.

It might have been a joke...

No, I looked into it. Sort of.

So it wouldn't be like a date?

No. No, no. That's the whole thing.

It'd be an arrangement.

Like donor sperm,

only you'd be getting a fully functioning

dad for your baby.

It's a really strange thing

to get your head around.

No, I was just thinking about

what my sister would say.

She's got three kids. Perfect family.

Well, maybe she'd be jealous.

I don't think so.

Well...you'd get the best of both worlds.

You'd have your baby, but you could

still date whoever you wanted.

Seriously, the whole 'partner for life'

thing - is it really that great?

I mean, most of the time

it's disastrous, or quietly crap.

Oh, cynical!

No. Oh, sorry. Sorry.

No, I just, um... I just think it's smart.

An arrangement.

You get to have a family,

but keep your freedom.

I don't know why more people don't do it.

Sounds like you should.

So, you think he'd make a good dad?

Yeah. Yep.

I'm not seeing anyone

that looks like that, Stevie.

She usually wears headbands.

Headbands?

And layers. Lots of layers.

She looks like the kind of person who

might do craft in front of morning TV.

Found her'?

Sony I'm late.

Oh, no, no worries.

Can you ring and rebook the AV

equipment for the next two Fridays?

I thought the parties were cancelled.

Ah, no, no, no.

I spoke to him and he wants to roll with

two really epic parties

before his treatment.

He was speaking about getting a second

DJ, training up Cantzi and Smitty.

Just taking up a whole other level.

I guess it's a pretty young crowd.

How old do you think I am?

Huh? Oh, no, Marcie, not you.

You'd fit in perfectly. You would!

Nice save.

You've got moves. Look at you!

You think I've got the moves?

Yeah!

Just from the walk

from the restaurant to...

Stevie!

He was great.

He was just really, really great.

You didn't tell me

he was so good-looking!

Oh! No, I guess I see a lot of him.

Bit too much, really.

Yeah. He's really in

the moment, isn't he?

Mmm.

Yeah.

We ended up drinking quite a bit.

I didn't expect it

to be such a big night actually.

Has he spoken to you yet?

No. I...

He's probably sleeping in.

Wish I was too!

Anyway, I just wanted

to thank you, Stevie,

for thinking of me

and organising everything.

He really is a brilliant guy,

but I can't do it.

Oh.

He has to lock it in,

like, basically this week.

And I don't know him.

Ah, I can vouch for him.

I know, I know.

But you've lived with him for years, and

I don't even really know you that well.

I don't mean that in a bad way...

No.

So, Smitty, you'll be shadowing Jonah.

Cantzi, you're on me.

You'll see the perks as they come,

you know, the attention,

but what I want you to note is the military

precision beneath these good times.

OK, you know, things like...

Jonah! Jonah!

Smitty, I will indicate when

the shadowing period begins.

It's things like that

that, you know,

are gonna get in the way

of us having a good night.

No pre-emption. Presumption.

I was just checking.

Yeah. Just check.

That's OK. Take the hat off for now.

Did you get my messages?

Ah, no. Sorry, it was a crazy day.

What'd she say?

She didn't call you?

Oh, well, she said that

she had a wonderful time

but ultimately it's not a road

that she wants to go down.

What... F***.

F***!

But, you know, she said that you were

lovely. You know, she had a great time.

Reckon I should call her

and say that that never happens?

I mean, only twice in my life have

I ever had any trouble getting hard.

Oh, the tequila!

The f***ing tequila.

I'm telling you, there's an ingredient

in tequila where I just can't...

You slept with her?

Ah, no.

Well, I mean, I tried to, yeah.

What?

You weren't supposed to try

and sleep with her, Jonah.

It was meant to be an arrangement.

F***! I've told you a hundred f***ing

times, it has to be an arrangement.

It should be an arrangement.

You OK?

Ah, yeah. Yep.

Yeah, sorry. Sorry.

I just... I shouldn't have

involved people from work.

No, you're right.

Can't believe I let that happen!

It's gotta be about the arrangement.

Just a clean...

If you could just get me

a second shot with her.

Stevie, just a second meeting,

I'd keep it all about the arrangement.

Jonah, honestly, she's...

I'd give her this house!

What?

Yeah. I'd give her the house.

You can't give her the house.

Listen, if a woman is gonna carry

my kid, I'm gonna give her this house.

Split it, you mean? You split it.

Nah, nah. It's theirs.

Hers and my kid's.

And she'd get to work, right?

Work as much as she wants?

You'd be a stay-at-home dad?

If that's what she wants.

Well, she does. She would want.

Then absolutely. Round the clock.

I'd be like a manny.

And you'd be totally cool with

her having relationships -

like, dating other guys?

Totally cool.

It wouldn't get weird,

her bringing other guys in the house?

Other guys, here.

How many guys are we talking about?

Oh, well, you know, like, a guy.

Um, a boyfriend.

It's her house.

You can't give her the house.

That's extravagant.

I'd put it in both of our names.

Oh, no, I wouldn't need that.

What?

Um...I'm gonna get...

I'm gonna get changed.

Can you just...

Dude! Dude!

Dude, dude, dude! Hey!

There you are. Gus said you'd

tell me how to change the keg.

Huh?

Jonah, Jonah!

Where's Stevie?

Oh, she's, um...got a migraine.

Poor thing.

Yeah. She'll be down later.

Hey, man, you know,

even if she pulls out, it's cool.

Don't worry about it, you know?

We're building our team.

It's the foundations for the empire.

We're gonna f***ing dominate, yeah?

Oh, hey, hey! Build-up in the hall!

Hi. You've reached

Stevie. Leave me a message.

Stevie, before in your room...

I don't know what that was,

but if there's even

the slightest chance

that you would consider...

With everyone else, it's never

really made total sense to me,

you know, how it would work

as an arrangement,

but with you, I get it.

I mean, we'd be two

best friends raising a kid.

Yeah...

If we were

to consider this,

I would have conditions,

a lot of conditions that

we would need to agree upon.

I would agree with whatever you...

"100% confidential."

Uh-huh.

Um, chances are this won't work

and if it doesn't, I want us

to go completely back to normal

with no-one knowing a thing.

Right, right, except Gus.

No! What? No, especially not Gus.

Yes, of course.

Right. Mm.

What? No. You need

to actually read it, Jonah.

Oh, I do?

Just sign it.

You...you don't have any

questions or comments?

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