One Day Page #6

Do you want to

get out of here?

Yes, please.

And through it all

She offers me protection

A lot of love and affection

Today must be quite tough for you,

having slept with the bride.

I don't know what

you're talking about.

What? How do you

know all these things?

Tilly told me all about it.

Oh, did she?

The foot massage

spun out of control.

I think you even

used my olive oil.

Footprints halfway

up the kitchen wall.

Well, that stuff's

behind me now, so...

Really, what happened?

Sex in toilet cubicles

lose its bittersweet charm?

Well, an orgy won't keep you

warm at night, Emma.

An orgy won't look after you

when you're old.

Well said.

Anyway, I screwed up my career.

And screwed up things with Mum.

That's not true.

And I screwed up my friendships.

And then Sylvie

just came along.

And she sort of,

well, saved me, really.

She's very beautiful.

Of course, she has absolutely

no sense of humor.

Just as well. A sense of

humor's overrated.

Goofing around all the time.

The only time Ian

ever really made me laugh

was when he fell

down the stairs.

Well, you know, Sylvie says

she doesn't like to laugh.

Doesn't really like

what it does to her face.

But you love her, right?

Yeah, I worship her.

I'm loving Colin instead

Oh, no, no. This way.

Where are we going?

Dex?

Oh!

So, come on, then.

You, huh?

Any romance?

Don't start, Dex.

What?

Your sympathy.

I'm not lonely. I'm alone.

There, how'd that sound?

Yeah, yeah.

I bought that.

It's true.

I've got a tiny advance

to write this book.

Em!

Mmm-hmm.

Well, you know, I have

something to tell you, too.

You're getting married.

Yeah.

So, you're pleased?

Of course I'm pleased, Dex.

Fantastic news, really.

Scented? Your wedding

invitations are scented.

Yeah, lavender.

No, Dex, it's money.

They smell of money.

August 1 4th?

Yeah, I think that's what

they call a shotgun wedding.

For 350.

With buffet.

Do you know who the father is?

Stop it.

I'm kidding.

Congratulations.

Thank you.

A dad.

I know.

Is that allowed?

Will they let you?

It's incredible, isn't it?

You're going to be

a wonderful father.

Do you really think so?

I don't doubt it

for a minute.

I missed you, Dex.

Well, I missed you, too.

No more disappearing.

No, well, I won't

if you won't.

Mmm?

Mmm.

Dex?

We should go.

Absolutely, let's go.

Come on, Jasmine.

Come on.

Come on.

You gonna stop crying?

How you getting on?

Good, mate.

Good. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not quite what

I was expecting, but...

How do you mean?

Well, you see the words

organic and homemade...

Yeah, I know. You imagined

a couple of hippies

on a little farm somewhere,

knitting their own muesli.

Nice idea, but this

is business, Dex.

Yeah, well, I realize that.

Here's your last two.

Listen, mate. You're only

here to learn the ropes, okay?

Company policy.

Everyone has to.

Callum, I'm enjoying it.

Honestly, I'm good.

There's plenty

of formula left.

I've pureed the veggies,

or you could mash a banana.

And what about Indian food?

I can give her a curry, can't I?

No, no, no, Dexter. No.

Sylvie, I'm joking.

Oh, I see.

I keep missing those, don't I?

I'm sorry.

It's just that I'm late.

I don't even know why I'm going.

I'm too old for hen nights.

No, you're not.

That's my cab.

Right, come on, then.

I'll be back tomorrow morning.

Okay.

Be good. Try not to

burn the house down.

I'll be fine. I'll be fine.

Goodbye, my sweetheart.

Say goodbye to Mummy.

Say goodbye to Mummy.

Oh, I know, honey.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Have a good time.

Oh! Come on.

We'll be all right, won't we?

Party started

there's no end in sight

Everybody's moving

to the rhythm that's inside

It's a crazy world but

tonight's the right situation

I am Spartacus.

No, I'm Spartacus.

No, I'm Spartacus.

I'm Spartacus.

wahey! Let's have a big hand

and give a round of applause...

Look, Jas.

Look, that's Daddy's ex.

...for basketball

stars TJ and Mickey D!

Isn't she loud?

Can you even fit

them in a two-shot?

They are so tall. I'm practically

melting over here.

Isn't she a loud, loud girl?

"Julie Criscoll,

aged 15, wanted

nothing more than

to change the world."

"If only all the politicians

would actually listen."

Yeah, well that's Em.

Is that Em? Yeah, that's Em.

She wrote the book.

Emma?

It's me.

I'm so sorry, darling.

Look, how's the party going?

How's it all going?

Um...

We're all going on

to some club. How is she?

Asleep. You know, finally.

She's been awake

all this time?

Yeah, my fault. I should

have given her the decaf.

See? There you go.

I made you laugh.

Are you all right?

Yeah.

No, no, I'm good. I'm good.

Why? Were you worried?

Oh, no. Um...

No reason. I just...

Well, I was just

checking up on you and...

well, everything's fine.

All right.

Look, Sylvie,

I know I'm not good at all this,

you know, dad/husband thing.

You're doing fine, Dexter.

No, and I know

if you had a receipt,

you would have taken

me back a long time ago.

But, you know, I'm working on it,

all right? So bear with me. That's all.

I've got to go.

I'll see you tomorrow.

All right.

Night.

Good night.

Funny?

Very funny.

Well, look at you.

You even look like a writer.

A writer in Paris.

There's a word for this,

isn't there?

Uh, butch.

I was gonna say gamine.

What do you look like?

Me? A screwed-up divorce.

So my apartment's not far.

Shall we?

How long are you staying for?

I suppose it's up to you,

really. It's just...

Look, I just wanted

to say something

which I couldn't

really do over the phone.

Well, ever since we were

last together in London...

Dexter, before you say

anything else, I have to...

There's something

I have to tell you.

You've met someone!

Is that really

so hard to believe?

A man?

Yes, a man. A guy.

A guy! He's a guy now,

is he? I see.

He's called Jean-Pierre,

Jean-Pierre Dusollier.

What, he's French?

No, Dex, he's Welsh.

He's handsome. He's charming.

He's just very, very French.

What, you mean rude?

No.

Arrogant?

Smokes too much,

wears a string of onions.

Why are you being like this?

Oh, God, you mean sexy. Is that what

you mean? You're having lots of sex?

Since when do I need

to ask your permission?

God knows

you never asked mine.

But we just slept together.

I haven't forgotten.

Dexter, we got a bit drunk.

Yeah, not that drunk.

You took your trousers off

over your shoes.

No, I didn't.

Did I?

I think that you were upset

about Sylvie and the divorce,

and you needed

a shoulder to cry on.

Or sleep with.

And that's what I was,

a shoulder to sleep with.

And that's why you did it, was it?

To cheer me up.

Well, it worked, didn't it?

If you must know, it was one of

the better nights of my life.

See?

Don't fish.

Dex, it was one time.

Well, it was three times.

Come on. Look, you don't

think it's a good idea?

You and me.

I do. I did.

In the late '80s.

Right.

Better get going.

Why? What are we doing?

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