Overboard Page #6

Synopsis: Rich bitch Joanna hires country carpenter Dean to build a closet on her yacht. When the two don't see eye-to-eye, Dean is left unpaid while Joanna sets sail. The following day, Joanna is fished out of the sea, after falling overboard, suffering from amnesia. Dean sees a neat way to regain the money she owes him... he tells her she's his wife; that way Dean gets a free housekeeper and mother for his four kids.
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director(s): Garry Marshall
Production: MGM
  3 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.8
Metacritic:
53
Rotten Tomatoes:
44%
PG
Year:
1987
106 min
2,651 Views


Say, Annie. Are you asleep?

No. Go away.

Uh... listen. I'm...

I'm sorry I came down on you

so hard before.

It's OK.

Just so you won't think I don't appreciate

all the work you're doin' in the house

and how you handle the kids

and all that, uh...

You know, I think you're doin' great.

I mean, what you said about me

and the boys tonight, uh...

I guess you probably...

You know, maybe you got a small point

there, and I just... I can't...

I can't talk to you

while you're turned away.

- Will you just please get your head out?

- No.

- No!

- Why?

Because I'm so ugly.

I got poison oak, too!

Come on, now.

Nobody cares what you look like.

I mean, we do like the way you look.

Normally you look real pretty.

You just don't now.

All right, forget it.

I don't even have a wedding ring!

- What?

- I lost my wedding ring in the sea.

OK, come on. Come on.

Let's go.

Oh, no.

I'm not going back in the water barrel!

I'm puttin' you in the bedroom.

I'll take the couch.

Oh, hey, listen.

I've had poison oak a million times.

Come on, guys. Up! Up!

Yeah. You know,

I once got poison oak on my bu... back.

And, uh...

Well, don't you worry.

It'll be gone in no time. Lift your head.

- That's it. Is that better?

- Yeah.

- All right?

- Yes.

Tell me something about my life,

about my past. Please.

Something not horrible.

Uh, OK.

Yeah. Well, there was that time, uh...

...when you were, uh...

You were working at...

yeah, Burger Boy over in Lewisville.

And, uh, this kid started

choking on a French fry.

Everybody there panicked,

including me, except for you.

You ran over to him and you gave him

that Heimlich manoeuvre, where you...

And poof! The kid puked up the fry

and they named you

Burger Boy employee of the month.

It was great. They put your picture

above the cash register and...

I was really proud of you. I mean it.

You can be quite charming

when you wanna be.

Ah. You just caught me on a bad day.

Good night... Annie.

Good night.

- Heads up!

- After I finished with the Coast Guard,

I looked up Dean.

We used to play football together.

Used to call him Mean Dean Proffitt.

Used to call me Bad Billy Pratt.

- Out!

- Now, Billy, when did we date?

Let's eat!

- It might be...

- Are we talking about the golf course?

Yeah. The guys with suits

come down in less than a week.

What do you think about this, huh?

Sink 'Em and Drink 'Em.

I think what I thought yesterday.

It's a lousy idea.

I thought you'd change your mind

now you're sober.

What about other places? Foreign places.

What do you mean?

Like France or Africa?

Mais oui!

La Tour Eiffel, comme c'est jolie!

I speak French!

It just came out.

Do I know what I said?

Yes, I do.

I must have learned that in Paris.

When was I in Paris?

In the Navy.

- Navy.

- Well, it's a stupid idea in any language.

Besides, we're building

these things in America.

Wait a minute. This isn't a bad idea.

I could invent some wild things here.

Go on.

Well, like, uh... the Taj Mahal,

Seven Wonders of the World.

- Bring them to the people of Elk Cove!

- Well, I gotta bring it in for a price.

I can bring it in,

but can you draw me some pictures

so I can see what you mean? Annie?

- What's this?

- Travis found a girlfriend.

Hey, Trav! Don't knock her up!

- Very funny! Watch your...

- Oh, Mom!

Yeah, "Oh, Mom!" Watch your language!

Come on! What are you talkin' about?

- Pick a wonder.

- Stevie Wonder.

- Give me a wonder. One wonder.

- There's Mount Rushmore.

- The Parthenon.

- Parthenon, right.

- St Basil's, the Russian cathedral.

- Grand Canyon. Everybody'll love that!

- Egyptian pyramids.

- The Eiffel Tower.

It's expensive. I gotta build...

If it rains... Hey, fibreglass! Perfect!

Let's clean up for an early dinner.

I've got a lot of drawing to do.

Isn't Dad gonna eat with us tonight?

No! He had to go out.

- He had to go bowling this time.

- Really?

It's pretty hard to go bowling

without a bowling ball.

D I know I done you wrong

d Do you remember

that rainy evening I put you out

d With nothin' but a fine-toothed comb

What would you want

with old sweet-mouth?

D Ain't that a shame, I know I'm to blame

d Bill Bailey,

won't you please come home?

Scott Murphy,

bring your invoice up to the front.

This ain't your average

pile of fertiliser here.

Uh-uh. No, siree.

This here's a special blend.

Fish heads, shrimp skins,

crab claws, earthworm droppings...

I don't wanna know that much about it.

- Here you go.

- After this, you get to shovel fish guts!

If you're lucky,

we'll let you clean the truck!

- Whoops! I forgot to give you this.

- What have I got to put on airs for?

Oh, stop fussing. You look great.

Well, they put their pants on

just like me - one leg at a time.

Now, don't be nervous, OK?

If you don't get it, so what?

We've been through

rougher times than these before.

I think.

Gentlemen, this is Dean Proffitt,

inventor and master craftsman.

What we're here for this evening is this.

It's the Wonders of the World

miniature golf course.

If you look at these pictures,

you can begin to sort of feel...

What we're trying to do is bring some

of this outer world here into Elk Cove.

The Leaning Tower of Pizza

doubles as a pizza stand.

That sort of gives us an idea

of where we might go in the future.

Oh, sh*t, I'm sorry. Here, let me get that.

Waitress! Get over here, will you?

Have you ever been nervous in your life?

Go ahead, ask me.

Ask me if we got the money.

Did you get the money?

- We got the money!

- Oooh, great!

- That's so great!

- Can you believe it?!

Step up! She rolls up here... and down.

It's got three choices. This time,

it's going through the oil funnel,

past the plastic fan,

into the kids' sand shovel and flour sifter.

Now, turn around quick. Here it comes.

It should be out about now.

- OK, now show me your invention.

- You're gonna hate it.

I'm not gonna hate it. I love 'em.

That's nice.

I gotta tell her, Billy.

I gotta tell Annie the truth.

In the beginning, it was OK

because it was part of a gag.

Now it's more like lies. I...

I know what you're thinkin'.

- Hey, I'm not thinkin' anything.

- Yeah, you are and I'm gonna tell her.

I know it's time to tell her!

Ooh, Dr Death looks mad.

- Joker's saying "No".

- I know. What does he say up here?

"I will re... re... re... "

- Reduce.

- "Reduce your puny planet to rub... "

- Ru... ru...

- Rubble.

Good! That's very good, sweetie.

Are you gonna leave?

No. I'm your mommy.

- I'm not going anywhere.

- Sometimes moms leave.

Well, I guess maybe they do.

But I'm not gonna go anywhere.

Good.

Oooh, what is this?

Is this a present for me?

- Yes. I made it from macaroni.

- I love it.

I'll always wear it.

- Hey, Dad!

- Hi! How's it goin', guys?

I got the part of Tiny Tim

in the school play.

- I got an A in English.

- I'm flunkin' math.

Well, I guess we better

work on it later on, huh?

You're just in time.

Dr Death is on the rampage.

Rate this script:4.5 / 2 votes

Leslie Dixon

Leslie Dixon is an American screenwriter and film producer. She began her career as an original screenwriter, writing films such as 1987's Outrageous Fortune and Overboard. She then moved into adaptations and re-writes, developing the screenplays for: Mrs. Doubtfire, The Thomas Crown Affair, Pay It Forward, and Hairspray. She has also produced a variety of films, and the television series Limitless. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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