Phunny Business: A Black Comedy Page #4

WHY SHOULD WE GIVE YOU FREE

EXPOSURE ON THE RADIO?

AND AT THAT POINT I TOLD HIM

YOU CAN HAVE YOUR COMEDIANS

COME UP HERE AND GO ON, BU IT'S GOING TO COST YOU FIVE

HUNDRED DOLLARS.

SFX:
CASH REGISTER

FIVE HUNDRED!

BUT THEN I THOUGHT, WGCI IS

THE NUMBER ONE RADIO STATION

IN THE MARKET.

IT'S A NO BRAINER.

SO A FEW WEEKS LATER I TAKE

STEVE HARVEY OVER TO THE DOUG

BANKS MORNING SHOW ON WGCI AND

STEVE KILLS.

AND THE GREAT THING ABOU STEVE WAS HE WOULD GO AHEAD

AND GIVE ALL THE PLUGS ABOU COMING TO ALL JOKES AND HE

WOULD BE FUNNY AS COULD BE,

BUT HE WOULD ALSO SIT BACK AND

HE WOULD OBSERVE.

SO AFTER OUR FIVE MINUTES ARE

UP DOUG SAYS, "THANK YOU GUYS

FOR COMING OUT" AND I THOUGH IT WAS OVER, BUT IT WASN' OVER FOR STEVE.

WAIT A MINUTE MAN.

I DONE GOT UP, FOUR THIRTY IN

THE MORNING; PRESSED MY

CLOTHES OUT.

I DONE SLEPT ON THE COUCH ALL

NIGHT LONG.

AND YOU GONNA BRING ME HERE TO

DO TWO SEGMENTS MAN.

Y'ALL MIGHT NOT KNOW WHO I AM,

BUT I GOT A REAL GOOD PICTURE

OF WHO THE HELL I AM.

Y'ALL NEED TO HOLD UP.

YOU HAVE NO ONE IN THIS BOTH

FUNNIER THAN ME.

YOU AIN'T FINA BRING NOBODY IN

HERE FUNNIER THAN ME.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT JOKES YOU

TELLING MISTER DJ, BUT THEY

NOT THIS MATERIAL RIGHT HERE.

HE WAS IN THERE FOR HOURS.

STEVE TOOK OVER THE SHOW.

I THOUGHT FOR SURE WE'RE NEVER

GONNA BE INVITED BACK, BUT BY

THE TIME WE GOT BACK TO THE

CLUB, THE PHONE WAS RINGING

OFF THE HOOK.

AND STEVE JUST JUMPED IN AND

STARTED TAKING CALLS.

YEAH ALL JOKES ASIDE, YEAH I'M

TRYING...

WHO IS THIS, NO WHO IS THIS?

I SAID, HEY MAN THIS IS STEVE

HARVEY.

THE DUDE ON THE RADIO?

YEAH MAN.

I WOULD TAKE RESERVATIONS FOR

ALL JOKES ASIDE.

STEVE WAS SPEAKING TO AN

AUDIENCE WHILE HE WAS ON, AN

AVERAGE OF FIFTY TO SIXTY

THOUSAND PEOPLE.

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CASH REGISTER

ALL YOU NEEDED WAS EITHER ONE

PERCENT OR TWO PERCENT OF THA AUDIENCE TO RESPOND AND THEY

DID.

BECAUSE OF THAT DAY RIGH THERE, THEY INVITED ME BACK

SEVERAL TIMES TO SIT IN FOR

DOUG BANKS. HEY THIS IS STEVE

HARVEY AT WGCI'S CLUB THROW

DOWN.

THEY GAVE ME A JOB AS THE

MORNING DRIVE GUY, WHICH

STARTED MY WHOLE RADIO CAREER.

STEVE HARVEY HAD LIT THE FUSE

AND ALL JOKES ASIDE WAS

STARTING TO BLOW UP.

RAYMOND HAD INVITED ME TO COME

TO THE CLUB JUST TO SEE WHA IT WAS LIKE.

I WAS BLOWN AWAY.

IT WAS TOTALLY DIFFERENT THAN

WHAT I EXPERIENCED AT OTHER

COMEDY CLUBS:

THEY WERE SERVING A NICHE THA HADN'T REALLY BEEN SERVED.

THIS WAS GOING TO BE THE

PREDOMINANT AFRICAN-AMERICAN

CLUB.

I GUESS YOU COULD SAY THAT TO

A CERTAIN DEGREE IT SERVES

THAT NICHE.

YOU GO TO A CHINESE RESTAURAN FOR CHINESE FOOD.

YOU GO TO A SOUL FOOD

RESTAURANT FOR SOUL FOOD.

THAT'S HOW WE LOOK AT IT.

RAYMOND AND HIS GROUP WERE

REALLY TRYING TO LET BLACK

PEOPLE KNOW THAT THIS IS HOW

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE TREATED.

WE DID HAVE A SOCIAL

CONSCIENCE, BUT TREATING OUR

CUSTOMERS WELL, THAT'S JUS GOOD FOR BUSINESS.

ALL JOKES ASIDE WAS THE TYPE

OF CLUB THAT LET YOU KNOW WHEN

YOU WALKED IN YOU WERE GOING

TO BE TREATED LIKE YOU WERE

OUT ON THE TOWN.

IT WAS NOT LIKE YOU WOULD

EXPECT A BLACK CLUB TO BE YOU

KNOW.

IT WASN'T GHETTO.

BECAUSE ANYTIME ANYTHING BLACK

EXISTS, EVEN AS A BLACK

PERSON, YOU TEND TO THINK THE

STEREOTYPE.

IT'S NOT GOING TO BE WELL RUN,

YOU KNOW.

IT'S GOING TO BE HALF ASS.

I USED TO DO A BIT THA ADDRESSED BLACK BUSINESS.

WHY IS THE CEILING FAN ON AND

NO BLADES ARE ON THE CEILING

FAN?

YOU ALWAYS HAD TO CUT THROUGH

THE KITCHEN TO GET TO THE

BATHROOM, AND THEN THE STAFF

ARGUING AMONGST THEMSELVES.

I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME!

BUT BELIEVE ME, THAT WAS NO THE CASE AT ALL JOKES ASIDE.

THIS WAS LIKE QUALITY MAN.

I MEAN EVERYBODY WORE THE SAME

OUTFITS.

THEY HAD THE LOGOS.

OH YES, WE HAD UNIFORMS. I HAD TO BE NEAT AND CLEAN AND

PRESSED.

RAYMOND WAS A REAL NEAT FREAK.

I ADMIT I'M A LITTLE O.C.D.

BUT NO MORE THAN NORMAL, IT'S

NOT LIKE I'M HOWARD HUGHES OR

SOMETHING.

I DON'T THINK.

WE EVEN HAD NAIL INSPECTIONS,

AND I CAN TELL YOU RIGHT NOW

THESE WOULD NOT HAVE PASSED

RAYMOND'S INSPECTION.

MATTER FACT IT WAS ONE OF THE

CLEANEST PLACES YOU COULD GO,

TO HEAR AND DO COMEDY, AND THE

SAFEST.

IN THE EARLY DAYS OF THE CLUB

WE ACTUALLY HAD A BATHROOM

ATTENDANT.

THERE'S A GUY THAT WORKED IN

THE BATHROOM MAN; THE GUY HAD

ALL THE GOOD STUFF, MAN.

HE HAD LIP BALMS.

HE HAD LOTIONS FOR YOUR DRY

HANDS.

THE GUY HAD IT ALL, POTATO

CHIPS.

OH, MAN I LOVE A CLEAN

BATHROOM MAN.

THEY SET IT UP NICE.

THEY HAD THE PICTURE ON THE

WALL, THE PAINTINGS ON THE

WALL.

IT MADE IT, IT LOOK LIKE A

COMEDY MUSEUM.

IT WAS KINDA LIKE A COUNTRY

CLUB FOR COMEDY.

IT WAS ALMOST LIKE IT WAS THE

MOTOWN OF COMEDY.

IT ACTUALLY WAS MORE OF A

THROWBACK TO WHAT THE COTTON

CLUB MY HAVE BEEN.

IT WAS A VERY CLASSY

ESTABLISHMENT.

AND THE AUDIENCE RESPONDED TO

THE CLASSY ENVIRONMENT BY

SHOWING UP "SUITED & BOOTED".

THAT'S THE ONE THING ABOUT A

CHICAGO AUDIENCE.

THEY DRESS TO IMPRESS.

BLACK PEOPLE HONEY, THEY DRESS

UP.

THEY SHINE WHEN THEY GO OUT.

YOU IN CHI-TOWN.

THIS IS WHERE THE BROTHERS

MUCH HIS GREEN GATORS WITH HIS

GREEN SUIT.

IT WAS A COMBINATION OF FOLKS.

IT WAS THOSE WHO WERE KIND OF

CONSERVATIVE STYLE WHO WORKED

DOWNTOWN AND THEN IT WAS THE

CHICAGOANS, YOU KNOW, WITH THE

BIG PLAID WINDOW PANE SUITS,

BUT SHARP!

I MEAN I REMEMBER WALKING

THROUGH THE LINE GOING, DAMN I

BETTER BE REALLY FUNNY, THESE

PEOPLE LIKE GOT THEIR HAIR

DONE!

IF YOU CAN AFFORD A MINK COA YOU'RE GONNA WHERE IT ALL YEAR

LONG IF YOU CAN.

YOU SEE CHINCHILLAS, YOU SEE

SOME BEAVERS, YOU SEE SOME

FOXES.

YOU THINK YOU'RE ON ANIMAL

PLANET.

IF THINK THAT WHEN A COMEDIAN

COMES INTO A CLUB AND HE LOOKS

OUT INTO THE AUDIENCE THAT HE

HAS AND HE DOESN'T SEE BLUE

JEANS AND EVERYBODY IS JUS LIKE SHINNING, IT SORT OF

MAKES THE COMEDIAN FEEL LIKE

HE NEEDS TO SET HIS GAME UP A

LITTLE BIT.

SOME OF THE COMEDIANS THAT I

DESIGNED CLOTHES FOR WERE

CEDRIC THE ENTERTAINER, STEVE

HARVEY, BERNIE MAC, JONATHAN

SLOCUMB.

THAT'S A TESTAMENT TO THE

LEVEL OF QUALITY THAT ALL

JOKES ASIDE HAD, BECAUSE IF I WAS A BULLSHIT CLUB PEOPLE

WOULD OF WORE BULLSHI CLOTHES.

BLACK AUDIENCES CAN BE VERY

DEMANDING, JUST ASK THE

COMICS.

BLACK AUDIENCES ARE THE

TOUGHEST AUDIENCES 'CAUSE

WHITE AUDIENCES APPLAUD

EFFORT. WOOOOO!

BLACK PEOPLE DON'T GIVE A DAMN

ABOUT EFFORT.

WE MAD WE PAID TO GET IN YOU

FORCED US TO BUY TWO DRINKS,

DUDE JUST BOUGHT SOME HO WINGS. HE FOUND OUT TWENTY

MINUTES INTO THE SHOW THA THIS DATE HE'S WITH AIN' GONNA GIVE HIM NONE. SO HE'S

MAD, AND NOW IT'S ON YOU.

AND IF YOU WERE LOOKING FOR

DRAMA, JUST SIT IN THE FRON ROW OF ALL JOKES ASIDE.

IF YOU SAT IN THE FRONT ROW

YOU BETTER BE READY TO BE

LAUGHED AT, TO BE PICKED ON,

TO BE PICKED AT.

'CAUSE BOY IF YOU SAT YOUR ASS

IN THE FRONT WITH A BIG OLE

PURPLE SUIT ON, BARNEY LADIES

AND GENTLEMEN, BARNEY.

GIVE IT UP!

HE'S HERE TONIGHT, THANK YOU.

A CAT LIKE A D.L. HUGHLEY OR

STEVE HARVEY, THEM CATS WOULD

MAKE YOU PART OF THE SHOW.

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