Phunny Business: A Black Comedy Page #5

HOW YOU DOIN GIRL?

SAY YOU GOT ON WHITE PUMPS

HUH?

PAYLESS PUMPS?

YOU COULD PAY MORE, BUT WHY?

THE CLUB WAS BECOMING A MECCA

FOR BLACK CHICAGO AND ALL

KINDS OF FOLKS WERE GETTIN'

THEIR LAUGH ON AT ALL JOKES.

TYRONE WAS UP IN THERE,

POOKIE, RAY RAY.

POINT DEXTER CAME.

YOU KNOW POINT DEXTER WENT TO

MOREHOUSE TOO.

IF IT'S A BLACK PERSON WHO WAS

A CELEBRITY, THEY MADE I THROUGH ALL JOKES.

SO YOU WOULD SEE MICHAEL

JORDAN THERE, YOU'D SEE HIS

WIFE, THIS IS DURING THE

PERIOD WHERE THE BULLS WERE

LIKE THE BEATLES OF SPORTS.

THE BEARS SHOWED UP, YOU KNOW,

RIGHT AFTER THE SUPER BOWL

SHUFFLE DANCE, WILLIE GAULT,

RICHARD DENT.

MIKE SINGLETARY, YOU KNOW,

WILBER MARSHALL, YOU KNOW, A

BUNCH OF US.

YOU KNOW, WE ENJOYED COMEDY.

SITTIN' THERE WATCHING CEDRIC

AND BERNIE MAC AND STEVE

HARVEY AND A LOT OF OTHER

GREAT INDIVIDUALS, HOW WE SAY,

YOUR FACE JUST HURT FROM JUS LAUGHING.

I LOVED HAVING CELEBRITIES

COME BY THE CLUB, BUT NOT THE

ONES WHO WANTED TO BE COMPED.

I HAD A POLICY, SUPPORT BLACK

BUSINESS, NO COMPS.

WE SPOKE WITH FORMER

SECURITIES PERSONALS MARY

LINDSEY AND RAYMOND LAMBERT OF

ALL JOKES ASIDE.

THEY HAVE BEEN LITERALLY

LAUGHING ALL THE WAY TO THE

BANK.

WE HAVE MODELED OURSELVES

AFTER PEOPLE LIKE BUDD

FRIEDMAN OF THE IMPROV BECAUSE

THEY TO US ARE THE COMEDY CLUB

CHAIN IN THE COUNTRY.

COMEDIANS LIKE WORKING FOR A

BLACK OWNED, BLACK RUN

ESTABLISHMENT WHEN THEY TAKE

CARE OF BUSINESS.

AND WHEN MBA'S RUN A COMEDY

CLUB, YOU GET POLICIES AND

PROCEDURES, EMPLOYEE

HANDBOOKS, AND STAFF MEETINGS.

ALL JOKES ASIDE WAS A LITTLE

MORE CORPORATE THAN THE OTHER

CLUBS THAT I HAD WORKED AT.

I'VE GONE TO STAFF MEETINGS,

BUT I NEVER WENT TO STAFF

MEETINGS AT THE HYATT.

RAYMOND, HE COME FROM

CORPORATE AMERICA AND SO HE

BROUGHT CORPORATE AMERICA TO A

HOODLUM ENVIRONMENT.

ALL JOKES ASIDE WAS THE ONLY

COMEDY CLUB THAT I ACTUALLY

WORKED AT WHERE WE HAD A

QUARTERLY BUSINESS REVIEW.

EVERY MONDAY MORNING I HAD TO

PROVIDE RAYMOND WITH A

DETAILED REPORT OF DRINK

SALES, TICKET SALES, AND

INVENTORY.

NUMBERS TELL THE STORY.

I LOVE NUMBERS.

I CAN NEVER HAVE ENOUGH

NUMBERS.

WITH CASH BUSINESSES WHA HAPPENED; PEOPLE STEAL

YOUR MONEY.

AND IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANY

EXPERIENCE WITH KNOWING HOW

TO MANAGE CASH, THEN YOU'LL

GET ROBBED.

I HAD TO RUN A TIGHT SHIP AND

KEEP MY EYE ON CASHIERS,

SERVERS, BARTENDERS,

EVERYBODY.

BUT I WASN'T ALL BUSINESS ALL

THE TIME.

AND I ENCOURAGED OUR STAFF TO

HAVE A LITTLE FUN TOO, GET TO

KNOW THE CUSTOMER, BUT ALWAYS

TREAT THE CUSTOMER WITH

RESPECT.

FOR RAYMOND, THE CUSTOMER'S

ALWAYS PARAMOUNT.

THE CUSTOMER WAS ALWAYS RIGHT.

THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS NUMBER

ONE.

RAY TOLD THE STAFF THEY COULD

BE FRIENDLY TO THE COMEDIANS,

BUT NOT TOO FRIENDLY.

NEVER GOT TO SLEEP WITH NONE

OF THE WAITRESS' SO I WAS VERY

DISAPPOINTED IN THAT.

YOU USUALLY COULD HIT ONE OF

'EM, THERE'S ONE OF THEM

THERE'S THAT'S FREAKY.

I COULD NEVER FIND THE FREAK.

RAYMOND DID NOT ALLOW US TO

FRATERNIZE WITH ANY OF THE

COMEDIANS, BUT SOME OF THE

COMEDIANS TRIED TO FRATERNIZE

WITH US.

SFX:
FOX CALL

GEORGE WILLBORN WOULD ALWAYS

CRACK ON ME, EITHER IT WAS ON

MY HAIR OR ON MY BREAST IN

PARTICULAR.

RUMOR HAD IT THAT I WAS DOING

SOMETHING TO HER.

I WAS DOING SOMETHING TO ALL

OF THEM THOUGH.

FROM THE WAIT STAFF RIGHT DOWN

EVERYBODY WHO WAS THERE, I WAS JUST A FAMILY FEEL TO IT.

EVERYBODY HAD A GOOD TIME,

EVERYBODY KNEW EVERYBODY ON A

FIRST NAME BASIS.

NOW WITH THE BUSINESS PART OF

SHOW BUSINESS UNDER CONTROL,

IT WAS TIME TO FOCUS ON THE

SHOW PART, SPECIFICALLY THE

COMEDIANS.

I NAIVELY THOUGHT THA COMEDIANS WERE EASY TO WORK

WITH, THEY'RE NOT, THEY'RE

DIFFICULT BUT IT HELPS IF YOU

KNOW THEIR ACT.

RAY LEARNED FAST HOW TO DEAL

WITH COMICS AND DEAL WITH

COMICS' EGOS.

BEFORE I BOOKED ANYONE I

STUDIED THEIR REEL.

HOURS AND HOURS OF REELS.

I WAS TRYING TO LEARN WHA MADE EACH COMEDIAN UNIQUE.

OBVIOUSLY THEY HAD TO BE

FUNNY, BUT DID THEY HAVE A

POINT OF VIEW?

TAKE LAVELL CRAWFORD OUT OF

ST. LOUIS FOR EXAMPLE, I

OBSERVED THAT A LOT OF HIS

COMEDY IS ROOTED IN HIS

RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS MOTHER.

I LOVE THAT BIT ABOUT HIS MOM

TAKING HIM SHOPPING.

WHEN WE GET IN THIS STORE I

DON'T WANT YOU TOUCHING SH*T.

I DON'T WANT YOU ASKING FOR

SH*T.

MATTER FACT I WANT YOUR EYES

CLOSED, 'CAUSE I DON'T EVEN

WANT YOU LOOKING AT SH*T.

AND LET ME TELL YOU ONE MORE

THING LAVELL MAURICE CRAWFORD.

IF YOU GET UP IN THIS STORE

AND ACT ANY KIND OF FOOL.

AND I DO MEAN ANY KIND OF

FOOL.

I'M GON KILL ALL THREE OF

Y'ALL.

STEVE HARVEY TURNED ME ON TO

A.J. JAMAL.

HE WAS MY INTRODUCTION TO

PHYSICAL COMEDY.

THE WAY I EVOLVED FROM MY AC BACK THEN, I WAS HIGH ENERGY,

I WAS ALL OVER THE STAGE.

WHEN I FIRST STARTED I'D DO

THIS PRINCE, MICHAEL JACKSON,

JAMES BROWN.

I'D TURN AROUND I'D DO THE

SPLIT AND JUST SHOOT RIGH BACK UP.

AND THEN OVER THE YEARS, I

SORT OF CREEPED BACK UP.

THEN I WOULD JUST DO THE SPLI AND NEVER GET BACK UP.

I'D ROLL OVER AND MAKE IT INTO

ANOTHER BIT, AND THEN I

COULDN'T EVEN GO DOWN.

AND SO OVER THE YEARS MY

PRINCE JUST BECAME A LITTLE

YOU KNOW, JUST "UHAH!"

AND THAT WAS IT.

I KNOW A REAL PLAYER WHEN I

SEE ONE AND THE YOUNG BILL

BELLAMY'S COMEDY REFLECTED HIS

PLAYBOY STATUS AND I THOUGH HE COULD BE A REAL HIT WITH

THE LADIES.

WHAT WAS HAPPENING WITH SOME

OF MY FRIENDS WERE GETTING

MARRIED WHICH WAS CRAZY TO ME

CAUSE I'M ON MTV, I'M LIKE YOU

DON'T GET MARRIED RIGHT NOW.

YOU BALL OUT 'TILL YOU FALL

OUT.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

I'VE BEEN TO ABOUT FOUR

WEDDINGS THIS YEAR AND IT'S

FUNNY TO SEE YOUR FRIENDS GE MARRIED CAUSE GUYS START TO

GET REAL NERVOUS THE DAY OF

THE WEDDING.

THEY START TALKING TO YOU REAL

FUNNY SAYING STUFF LIKE, OH

MAN, CAN I?

CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR A

MINUTE?

YOU LIKE, WHAT'S WRONG?

I AIN'T GONNA SEE YOU NO MORE,

MAN.

AND YOU THINK THEY'RE PLAYING.

MAN, THIS IS IT MAN, IT'S ALL

OVER.

NAW MAN, WE'LL HANG OUT.

SHE SAID, NO WE AIN'T.

BELLAMY GAVE ME THE TAPE OF A

YOUNG ARIES SPEARS.

AND THAT WAS MY FIRST EXPOSURE

TO AN IMPRESSIONIST.

I HAD ALREADY STARTED COMEDY

WHEN I WAS FOURTEEN.

EDDIE MURPHY ON SNL WAS KING

TO ME.

I WAS SO BLOWN AWAY BY HIS

ABILITY TO DO IMPRESSIONS.

PICTURE ELMER FUDD F***IN'.

ELMER FUDD WOULD HAVE GOOD

TIME CAUSE ELMER FUDD BE LIKE,

OH, THIS IS WUOVELY, OH, OH

WUOWER, TO THE WUEFT TO THE

AH-AH-AH-AH-AH!

ANOTHER THING RAY HAD TO LEARN

WAS WHICH HOLLYWOOD TALEN MANAGERS TO TRUST.

WORTHY PATTERSON WAS A MANAGER

HE DID TRUST.

WORKING WITH RAY WAS REALLY A

FIRST FOR ME.

HAVING BEEN A BLACK MANAGER I

NEVER REALLY TALKED TO ANY

BLACK COMEDY CLUB OWNERS.

WORTHY PUSHED ME HARD TO BOOK

CARLOS MENCIA, A LATINO

COMEDIAN FROM LOS ANGELES, I'M

SO GLAD HE DID.

I SAID, RAY IF YOU DON'T BOOK

CARLOS I'M NOT GOING TO GIVE

YOU ANY OTHER ACT.

I SAID, TRUST ME THIS GUY WILL

DELIVER.

SEE I WAS BORN IN HONDURAS;

I'M NOT EVEN ACTUALLY MEXICAN.

I GREW UP THERE IN EAST L.A.

BUT I'M NOT MEXICAN, NOT THA IT REALLY MATTERS ESPECIALLY

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