Pineapple Express Page #10

Synopsis: Lazy court-process clerk and stoner Dale Denton has only one reason to visit his equally lazy dealer Saul Silver: to purchase weed, specifically, a rare new strain called Pineapple Express. But when Dale becomes the only witness to a murder by a crooked cop and the city's most dangerous drug lord, he panics and dumps his roach of Pineapple Express at the scene. Dale now has another reason to visit Saul: to find out if the weed is so rare that it can be traced back to him--and it is. As Dale and Saul run for their lives, they quickly discover that they're not suffering from weed-fueled paranoia: incredibly, the bad guys really are hot on their trail and trying to figure out the fastest way to kill them both. All aboard the Pineapple Express.
Genre: Action, Comedy, Crime
Director(s): David Gordon Green
  Nominated for 1 Golden Globe. Another 2 wins & 13 nominations.
 
IMDB:
7.0
Metacritic:
64
R
Year:
2008
111 min
6,443 Views


I need medical attention.

What? I thought we just got all

pumped up. What was that about?

Ted is a f***ing murderer.

I can't f*** with him.

I got a wife.

She's gonna be out of jail soon.

I wanna f*** her. I am not gonna

wake up murdered tomorrow.

Oh, man, no.

This is lame of you, man.

Come on. This could be

your moment of redemption.

This could be your moment.

I don't want a moment.

I don't want... Fine, go.

F*** you.

Please come back for me.

Please come back.

Legends never die, dude.

I'll tell your story.

Carol, she's cool now.

Carol used to be a little crazy, man.

She used to throw tickle parties.

- Sounds like home-cooking to me.

- That was fun.

Game over, motherfuckers!

Everybody freeze!

Tell me where my friend is

or this guy gets it!

All right, everybody be cool, man.

Be cool.

Put your guns down.

Nobody shoots.

Put them down. On the ground.

All right, everybody just chill.

Oh, my God!

- You shot him.

- Put the gun down.

- Drop the f***ing gun.

- Don't shoot me!

- Holy sh*t.

- I said, nobody shoot. You shot Pete.

That's right. I shot him. I shot him.

I shot him. I don't have time

for a f***ing negotiation.

Now, I wanna finish this off

so I can go home...

...and have dinner

with my wife for once.

If anybody asks, Denton killed Pete.

End of story.

I'm telling Ted.

- lf you do...

- He's got a piece.

- Motherf***er.

- Okay, I'm sorry.

He's got another one, in the side.

Damn it. I got one more on my leg.

There's one more.

I know you'll find it. Take it.

I'm sorry, guys.

Sorry I deceived you.

No. Come on.

- Oh, great.

- Saul.

- Dale.

- Yes.

What did you do, rat me out?

Is that what you did, you bastard?

- No, man.

- Yes.

I'm here to save you.

No. You just got caught too.

And I'm gonna die in here

with some a**hole.

Okay, you know what?

I deserved that.

I'll take that because

I have been an a**hole, man.

This whole thing is my fault.

I ruined your life.

Okay? And I know there's no way...

...to make that up to you

except by saving your life.

So that's what I came here to do.

I'm here to save my best friend.

Because that's what you are.

You're my best friend.

You're a mean jerk.

I was mean.

I was mean because, I think...

I didn't want

you to be my best friend.

I didn't wanna think

that that's what my life was.

Now I realize I'm lucky

to have you as my best friend.

You're the best guy I know.

BFFF.

Best f***ing friends forever, man.

Seriously.

- All right. Give me a hug.

- Yeah. Okay.

Thanks, man.

I'm so sorry about everything.

Oh, I'm such a dick.

- Okay. I'm gonna get us out.

- No, you're not, but it's okay.

These guys are gonna f***ing kill us.

We gotta get out of here.

- I know. They are.

- F***, man.

We can hear you outside and

it's very f***ing annoying, all right?

- Okay. Sorry about that, sir.

- Shut the f*** up.

Do you know

what "shut the f*** up" mean?

I do.

Sh*t. Stupid motherfuckers.

Yes. Okay. I got an idea. I got an idea.

My belt buckle. My belt buckle.

Right here. Okay? Rub your wrists

against my belt buckle. That'll do it.

- Is it working?

- I can't feel it.

I can't feel you.

- Wait, I feel it.

- I feel it. Yes, okay.

- Okay.

- Okay. Okay.

- I'm gonna save you, man.

- Yeah. Yeah.

- Let me save you.

- Save me, Dale.

It's not working.

We gotta change angles.

We gotta

get more leverage-y. Okay.

Okay, that's good. That's good.

Get your hands up on it.

There we go.

- All right. All right.

- Yeah. Okay.

- Yes. Yes.

- Okay.

I'm gonna save you, man.

I'm gonna save you.

- You're my best friend, man.

- Yeah, see?

- It's not working.

- Let me use my... I'll use my mouth.

Finish it off with my mouth, pal.

Let's go.

Come on. Let's go.

Harder.

- Where are these f***ers?

- We got them downstairs.

- Where did you find them?

- Found Saul at his grandmother's.

He f***ed up Matheson's face.

Hit him with a pot of hot coffee.

It's gross.

Dale Denton comes flying in here

like a madman...

...armed to the teeth, and,

as you can see, he shot Peter.

Plugged him, just whacked him.

Now they're both disarmed

and they're downstairs.

He shot Pete?

F***ing Pete? He was ex-CIA.

Who the f*** is this Dale Denton?

Who is he? Where did he come from?

I do not know.

Time to cook sh*t up tonight.

Take his stash and burn

this motherf***er down.

Stop. Wait here.

No retreat, no surrender.

Yes, yes, yes.

- Wait, someone's coming.

- Okay, okay, okay.

If I cough once, I'll take the lead.

If I cough twice, you go, okay?

Well... I cough sometimes for real.

Just don't. Don't...

Yo, look. I'm gonna say this

one time.

Whatever you're doing,

I get it, okay?

Stop.

See, I don't think

you understood me.

I can hear everything you're saying.

One cough mean you go.

Two cough mean you take the lead.

The belt buckle.

Best friends forever.

Y'all f*** on your own time, man.

Sorry, man. It was a stupid plan.

What the f*** is that?

Dale!

I've been waiting for this.

You burned my face!

I'm gonna tear this ass up.

You shot me.

I'm sorry, man.

I've never been shot.

Damn, that hurt.

I got glass in my ass.

- Dale. Dale!

- This is messed up.

Has anyone seen my bigger knife?

Asians!

War is upon you!

Prepare to suck the cock of karma!

Get down, motherf***er!

Come on!

F***!

Go! Go!

Get down, baby!

Dale, no!

No, wake up, man.

No, you're not dying, man.

Not without me.

- Dale.

- What?

You're alive.

- You're... You're alive.

- What happened?

- He got your ear, man.

- He got my what?

- He got your ear.

- F***!

F***!

- Help!

- My ear.

- Yeah.

- Help!

- You killed my ear.

- You shot me.

- I didn't do that.

- He shot me.

You shot him?

- Get your hands off of me.

- Shut up.

We've had enough out of you.

I'm not your friend.

Maybe I can just...

No. No, infected.

Is that it? Maybe if we just hold it.

It's clear.

Dude. Look.

Nice.

Bullets.

So seriously,

how gross does my ear look?

Is it really disgusting

or is it, like, kind of cool in a way?

Right now it's pretty disgusting.

I feel like I can smell it.

Don't worry, bro.

Think about Evander Holyfield.

You can't even tell.

That's a good point.

Wait.

Did you shoot that guy?

No. I'm out of bullets.

Me too.

Maybe it was ricochet.

Gravity.

Oh, nice.

You go down.

I'll cover.

Watch my back.

I'll go down and take care of this.

Sexy motherf***er.

No, no, there might be

more bad guys up there.

No, we'll sneak out through

the vent. Come on.

I'll boost you up, okay?

And then you pull me up.

Oh, nice.

Here we go. Okay.

Get up. Yeah. Nice.

Nice.

Nice. Okay.

Pull me up.

I'm ready. Go.

- Give it to me.

- Come on.

- Be taller.

- Be stronger.

- Pull harder.

- Dale, come on.

Pull. Pull me. Come on, man.

- I'm jumping as high as I can.

- Denton!

Dale!

I'll get help. I'll get help.

Go ahead and run, you little dipshit.

I'll find you.

Give me that fire extinguisher.

Okay.

You and me, baby.

Drop it now! Put the bag down!

Rate this script:3.0 / 1 vote

Seth Rogen

Seth Aaron Rogen (; born April 15, 1982) is a Canadian-American actor, voice actor, comedian, writer, producer, and director. He began his career performing stand-up comedy during his teenage years. While still living in his native Vancouver, he landed a supporting role in Judd Apatow's series Freaks and Geeks. Shortly after he moved to Los Angeles for his role, Freaks and Geeks was officially cancelled after one season due to low viewership. Rogen later got a part on sitcom Undeclared, which also hired him as a writer. After landing his job as a staff writer on the final season of Da Ali G Show, Apatow guided him toward a film career. Rogen made his first movie appearance in Donnie Darko with a minor role in 2001. Rogen was cast in a supporting role and credited as a co-producer in Apatow's directorial debut, The 40-Year-Old Virgin. Universal Pictures subsequently cast him as the lead in Apatow's films Knocked Up and Funny People. Rogen co-starred as Steve Wozniak in Universal's Steve Jobs biopic in 2015. In 2016, he developed the AMC television series Preacher with his writing partner Evan Goldberg and Sam Catlin. He also serves as a writer, executive producer, and director with Goldberg. Rogen and Goldberg co-wrote the films Superbad, Pineapple Express, The Green Hornet, This Is the End, and directed both This Is the End and The Interview; all of which Rogen starred in. He has also done voice work for the films Horton Hears a Who!, the Kung Fu Panda film series, The Spiderwick Chronicles, Monsters vs. Aliens, Paul, Sausage Party, and will provide the voice of Pumbaa in the 2019 remake of The Lion King. more…

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