Premature Page #8

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If we stopped studying

altogether and just did this.

[ Laughing ] Okay.

That way, I mean, you just

have to, like, hook me up with

cheat sheets and write

my papers for me.

[ Chuckles ]

But I tutor you.

Yeah, but isn't this better?

I mean, we can fun during our

study sessions, and then you can

go home and do my work after.

[ Chuckles ]

Okay, but... You don't ever

have to act cool around me.

I thought that's why you like

me, that and I make you feel safe.

[ Chuckles ]

I never said that.

[ Chuckles ]

You are right. Um... Look,

Angela, you are obviously

very, very hot, but,

you know what?

This never works out.

I mean, I have tried to have sex

with you like six times, and I'm done.

I mean, I don't know where I'm supposed

to be, but it is definitely not here.

And I'm sorry...

white zinfandel?

What are you? Like, 45?

Okay, then you can get

the f*** out of here.

Will do.

Dick. [ Scoffs ]

White zin's delish.

That was quick.

Go f*** yourself.

[ Whimpers ]

[ Sighs ]

I talked to my buddies

in admissions.

You don't think I would have found

out that you blew off the interview?

I went to Gabrielle's to tear

you away from the spelling bee.

She told me you went over to

"what's-her- slut's"... her words.

Dad, it has been a

really long day.

Oh.

It's not over yet. Here.

Put this on.

There he is.

Oh, Jesus. Okay.

Get your game face on.

Jack roth?

RARBG.COM Yeah?

I'm Jim crabbe. This is

my son, rob.

We talked on the phone before.

Right.

Right.

Have a seat.

Great.

Thanks for seeing us

before you left town.

Jim, could you go get

us some scotch?

Couple scotches?

Service here is sh*t.

Oh, sure. Okay.

Um... What'll you have?

Dewar's on the rocks with

a twist. Make it a double.

[ Sighs ]

Your dad really wants

you to go to Georgetown.

Yeah.

Do you?

What's going through

your mind right now?

Just that I can't wait for

this day to be over.

You and me both.

My cat shits outside of the box.

Not down the hall or in the basement or

in my bed, just right outside of the box.

It's a big "f*** you. "

Yeah, what's up with that?

My wife passed away a

few months ago.

And the cat really loved her.

He wishes I had died instead

of her. That's what he's saying.

Have you considered that

maybe... Your cat's just an a**hole?

He is an a**hole.

Thank you.

There we go. [ Chuckles ]

Jim, I was just asking your son why he wants

to go to Georgetown, but I would like to

hear it from you. Why do you

want him to go to Georgetown?

Well, my going there was the

transformative experience of my life.

And you just assume that what was

best for you is also the best for him?

Let me put it this way.

I had a choice. It was either

Georgetown or Yale.

Why did you choose Georgetown?

I actually... I didn't

choose it.

Georgetown gave me

a scholarship.

Sometimes the universe has a way of

helping when you're about to make a mistake.

You're on fire tonight.

Yeah. I'll get them.

I'll get them.

Okay.

[ Sighs ]

Is it French?

Yes.

Can I have the

definition, please?

"To determine or

appoint beforehand. "

Can you use it in a

sentence, please?

It is debated whether

the events of our lives are

foreordained or the

product of our own brain. "

I don't want to go

to Georgetown.

But all...

don't... React.

Just feel.

Maybe I want to go. Maybe not.

I'll go to a good school

no matter what, but...

The only thing I know right now

is that I really like Gabrielle.

[ Chuckles ] Like, a lot,

and, uh...

Every time today plays

out, I f*** it up.

And I'm not gonna let

it happen again.

Gabrielle is my Georgetown.

I have no idea what that

means, but I support you.

[ Exhales deeply ]

It's gonna be okay.

Can I have my headband back?

Yeah.

Looks better on you.

[ Chuckles ] Thanks, Jack.

Let's go get that f***ing girl!

Okeydoke.

Yeah.

Get in!

Can you drive?

Sure.

Why don't we get

some fries, too?

Okay, so what do I do?

Well, it's too late to knock.

Which one is her window?

The light's still flickering.

Okay.

Yes!

During your darkest time,

why was there only one set of

footprints in the sand?

What? Because I

carried you, brother.

Get over here.

What are we doing?

You're gonna need a boost.

[ Grunting ]

What are you doing?

I need to talk to you.

[ Exhales ]

I didn't have sex with Angela.

[ Chuckles ]

N-o...

Yeah. You didn't bang the

school slut. What a hero.

Get the f*** out of my room.

Gabs, come on.

[ TV turns off ]

Stop it, okay?

[ TV turns on ]

[ TV turns off ]

Really?

I'll buy you a new one.

Just... Listen, okay?

When I woke up this morning,

I expected to be here tonight.

I mean, I couldn't imagine a scenario where I

wouldn't have been, but I lost sight of that.

But I'm here now,

curse or no curse.

Rob!

How's it going up there?

Who's that?

That is my Georgetown

interviewer.

Rob, how's it going?!

With the girl?!

What are they doing here?

We had a drink at the hotel.

Sh*t got deep.

Just listen, okay?

I thought that I had

feelings for Angela.

Rob, leave.

Well, just let me finish.

Angela isn't...

ugh! This isn't about Angela!

Just... Get out.

I'm not going anywhere.

Okay. Fine.

I can end this. I just

have to finish you off.

Then you're out of my room

and you're back in yours.

Okay?

What?

Let's go. Come on.

Whoa! Don't... Do that.

Hey, whoa!

Hold on!

It'll be over really fast.

Gabs, seriously, stop!

Don't touch me!

'Cause that's not hurtful.

Well, if you would just...

Gabrielle, what are you doing?!

Take off your pants

so I can be alone!

Gabrielle!

[ Door opens ]

Oh, sh*t.

Hi, dad.

Oh, thank God, sir.

Please don't leave, because

your daughter... [ Scoffs ]

She was trying to take advantage

of me, and, uh... I just want to

assure you that I do not wish to

do anything physical with or to her.

[ Chuckles ] Right now.

I'd feel a lot better about this if

you put your shirt back on... Dear.

Yeah. Sure. Here you go.

[ Chuckles ]

So... look, I'll leave, if

that's what you want, but...

I just want to say, um... I don't

know what I'd do without you.

I mean, you're, like, the only

way that I can get through the day.

Every night before I go to sleep,

I check to see if you texted me.

I mean, you were the one who t old me to

stop wearing white socks with black pants.

It's not a good look.

You give me raisins in third period

so my blood sugar doesn't go low.

You don't eat properly.

You download hall and

oates songs onto my phone.

That started as a joke,

but now I like them.

[ Laughs ] Me too.

I love h&o.

Look, today has been terrible, Gabrielle,

each version of it, but it's been

worth it because today's the day I

finally realized how much I like you.

And now all I want to do is

just sit... Several feet away from

you and watch the spelling bee.

But I obviously ruined

all that, so...

I'm just going to leave the way I

came in and hope I get another shot.

[ Grunts ]

[ Clears throat ]

Oh, sh*t.

So, um... you're at that age.

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