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Same Time, Next Year Page #3
Not particularly. Aw, come on. You have to.
I don't want you to get the wrong
impression of him. Okay, if you insist.
I do. Okay.
Harry's this, like, big,
heavyset kind of guy, you know-
I really wish you hadn't told me that. Why?
Oh no, don't worry.
He's gentle as a puppy.
Anyway, uh, last year
he got this great idea...
that he'd take Tony out
to fly a kite.
See, Tony's
our four-year-old.
And so they went out to the park to
fly a kite, but there wasn't any wind.
So it's about an hour later, and I
was on my way home from the laundromat.
I passed by...
and I see Tony
sound asleep in the car.
I look out in the park.
There's Harry all alone
in the park,
all red in the face
and out of breath,
and he's just pounding
up and down...
with this huge kite dragging
Oh, I don't know.
It just really got to me.
Yeah, I know.
Helen has some nice
qualities too. Who's Helen?
My wife.
You said her name
was Phyllis.
I know. I lied.
Phyllis Helen! What's the
difference? I'm married!
Look, I was nervous. I was afraid
you'd try to look me up or something.
I didn't want to
leave any clues.
Is your name really George?
Well, of course it is.
You think I'd lie
about my own name?
Yes.
That would be crazy!
Well, you're
pretty crazy.
It's funny, isn't it?
Here we are in a hotel room,
gazing into each other's eyes.
We're both married, and we
have six kids between us.
Do you have
any pictures?
What?
Pictures of your kids.
Yeah, but I don't think
this is the time or place.
Come on, come on. If you show
me yours, I'll show you mine.
I keep mine in this little
folder we got free from Kodak.
Where's yours? You have
to take the whole wallet.
Ahh!
Ohh.
Is that the oldest one with
Yeah, that's Michael.
Funny-looking kid, isn't he?
No. What does he
wanna be, Superman?
No, Peter Pan.
I'm kinda worried
about him.
Why is this one's face
all scrunched up?
That's Paul. That was
taken on a roller coaster.
Isn't it
natural looking?
Right after that
he threw up.
Yeah, he's really, um-
I guess he- I guess
No, both of us, really.
What's your little girl's name? Debbie.
That was on her second birthday. We were
trying to get her to blow out the candles.
She's got her hand in the cake.
Neat is not her strong suit.
Ohh.
You have great-looking kids, George.
Thank you.
So do you.
Thank you.
Okay, but this
is the last time.
Hello!
The seasons
have come and gone!
And the world
goes tumbling on!
Look what's happened
since I last saw your smile!
Hello!
Love's invited us
back here!
The same as she did
last year!
To come and spend!
A while!
And the last time I Felt
like this! The very last time!
I was Falling in love!
I was Falling!
Falling and Feeling!
I'd never
Fall in love again!
Yes, the last time I Felt
like this! The very last time!
Was long before I knew!
What I'm Feeling!
What I'm Feeling now
with you!
Be sure and tell me
before you come out.
Right now.
Wait a minute. Not yet.
I'm getting bored.
Okay, come on out.
IFI knew you were coming
I'd have baked a cake!
Baked a cake
Baked a cake!
If I knew you were coming
I'd have baked a cake!
How d'you do How d'you do How d'you do!
That's wonderful.
Happy anniversary,
darling.
Blow out the candles and
make a wish. All right.
What'd you wish?
I only have one wish.
What? That you keep on
showing up here every year.
What? You hate my hair, dont you?
I told you, I love your hair. Really?
I don't know. Next time I'm going
to go into the city to get it done.
How are the suburbs?
Oh, muddy, mostly.
Right now everyone's
very excited.
Next week they're gonna
connect the sewers.
It's not exactly the life of Scott
and Zelda, but we're surviving.
Uh, let's go over there.
Scott and Zelda, huh?
You started reading.
Oh, you don't know
the half of it.
I've joined the Book of the
Month Club. Good for you!
Sometimes I even take
the alternate selections.
Thank you.
Good evening,
Mr. Peters, ma'am.
Hello, Mr. Chalmers.
Nice to see you again.
Good to be back.
Well, how 'bout you?
Are you still in New Jersey?
No. We moved to Connecticut. Really?
We bought a barn and converted
it. Oh, what's it like?
Drafty.
Helen's got
the decorating bug now.
I have this mental picture
of her at my funeral,
as they're closing the lid to my coffin,
throwing in two fabric swatches...
and yelling out,
"Which one do you like?"
That's the bad story about
her. What else is new?
Oh, how's Michael?
Crazy as ever.
He had this homework assignment to write
about what he did on his summer vacation.
Trouble was, he wrote
what he actually did. What?
Tried to get laid.
He wrote in great comic detail
about his unfortunate tendency...
to get an erection on all
forms of public transportation.
The school
almost suspended him.
arent you?
He's a very weird kid,
Doris.
You know what? I think
that one really gets to you.
Come on, now.
Admit it.
All right, I admit it.
He's a nice kid.
There.
Was that so hard?
Mmm.
What was that for?
For everything.
For this.
For one beautiful weekend
every year with no cares,
no ties,
no responsibilities.
Thank you, Doris.
Doris.
Gee, and I just got
all dressed up.
Mmm.
Oh, somebody has
Damn.
Hello?
Yes, this is Daddy!
Funny?
That's probably because
Daddy was just, uh, uh-
I have a frog
in my throat, sweetheart.
Uh... wh-
Oh, it came out, huh?
Ohh. Well, of course
Well, tonight,
of course.
Well, sweetheart, I wish
Daddy could find it for you,
but I'm, uh...
I'm working.
Honey, does Mommy
know you called?
Oh, I'll try. Yes, I
love you too, sweetheart.
Yes, I do!
Very much Ye-
Okay.
Okay, bye.
Oh, God,
I feel so guilty!
Was that Debbie?
Her tooth came out,
and she can't find it,
and she's afraid the
tooth fairy won't know.
Oh, God, that thin, reedy little
voice! You know what that does to me?
Sure, that cheerful look on your
face doesn't fool me for a minute.
You think this is funny?
Doris, my little girl, said,
"I love you, Daddy,"
and I answered her in a voice
still hoarse with passion.
I get the picture, George.
Dont you ever
feel guilty?
Sometimes. Well, you never say anything.
Well, I just handle it
in a different way. How?
Privately.
Boy, something like this
really brings you up short.
I mean, look at this.
Look at me. Look.
I tell you, Doris, when she started
talking about the tooth fairy,
that affected me
in a very profound manner.
On top of which, I have
indigestion you won't believe.
It hit me that hard,
you know?
you know, George?
What do you
want me to do?
It is only making you feel
worse. I can't feel worse!
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"Same Time, Next Year" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 1 Sep. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/same_time,_next_year_17395>.
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