School Dance Page #5

You up here at the school

with some Heelys on?

I'm crazy!

Now, let this student

and this

beautiful super-model...

Thank you, baby!

...come on through.

See you.

I'm gonna see you.

Move, b*tches!

You're gonna leave 'em alone around here.

Hit me again.

Built like a goddamn car!

Call me when you want

a ride too, motherf***er!

Yes, Lord!

This milkshake brings all the boys

to the yard, son. Trust and believe!

I'll stick my face in that ass.

You'd get stuck.

Oh!

That's how I got your

daddy to knock me up.

Knocked me good and up!

I want you to stay out

of my woman's face.

You're not going

with that b*tch.

Yeah. Get on out of here.

Or what?

Or what? You sure?

Let's roll.

Let's roll, nigga.

Start, b*tch!

God damn it!

All of you better be in a car

seat when you leave here.

Easy, cuz!

Easy, cuz!

Get your ass out of here!

F***ing

piece-of-sh*t car.

F*** this raggedy motherf***er.

I don't give a f***, b*tch.

Go around, b*tch. Go around!

Sh*t. I don't give a f***.

What the f*** you looking at, motherf***er?

Now, going live

to the LAPD eyewitness ride-along.

So, this is what

we like to do all day.

We survey the land

and look for evildoers.

And we like picking up b*tches!

What the f*** would you say

that in the camera for?

You don't like

picking up b*tches?

I love picking up b*tches.

But I don't say it in the camera.

Holy sh*t! Rock the cockblock!

We got some serious

rocking the cockblock right here.

Pull over, f***ers.

We are in hot pursuit!

They're pulling over.

We got ourselves a hot tamale right here.

Oh! Rock the cockblock!

This is what taxpayers pay for

right here and these

boys are mine, baby!

Rock the cockblock!

Yeah!

Turn the music down!

Huh?

Turn the music down!

What?

Turn the f***ing music down!

Hold on, I can't hear you.

The music is too loud! Let me turn it down.

How fast you were going?

Um...

Apparently not fast enough,

Officer, since you caught us.

Obviously these guys

are on drugs. Okay?

Do you have any

paraphernalia in the car?

- Any weapons?

- No, sir!

I mean, ma'am.

Officer Penis?

It's P'eniss.

It's French.

Hey, Penis, all we got is these

brownies my grandmother made

and this non-alcoholic grape

drink to wash it down with.

- Really? Can I have some of that?

- Yeah, man.

- Where's the drink?

- You want some?

What the f*** are you doing?

What the f*** are you doing?

This isn't a restaurant!

I'm starving. I didn't have

anything to eat today.

But you can't

eat sh*t from them.

Your grandmother made these?

Yes, sir.

These are amazing!

You tell her, she needs her own show.

This is ridiculous sh*t!

Get out of the car!

You have to be firm

and authoritative

so that these perps

treat you with respect.

Cockblock!

Hot pursuit!

Hot pursuit!

Two black men in a white Rolls

Royce going down Fairfax.

Roger that, Officer Penis!

It's P'eniss!

Yeah, man. I'm gonna have to

make you work the corners.

Make us some money, man!

Whatever, Holmes!

I can feel the burn!

This thing works.

I feel like Bruce Lee.

We better start rehearsing if we are

gonna win the talent show tonight.

I got some cool moves.

Hey, pretty b*tches!

I know you didn't just disrespect

us and call us b*tches.

What you talking about disrespecting?

Ain't nobody disrespect you!

I said pretty b*tches. Disrespecting

you is calling you ugly b*tches!

It's a compliment, b*tch.

Them b*tches don't know.

Ay, he does have a point.

Thank you.

Damn, he is kinda cute,

in a little chocolate

Smurf type of way.

It's me, baby.

You see it.

You guys can't be serious.

Do you hear your friends?

Come on, you guys,

let's go inside.

This b*tch over here

acting like a See-You-In-Tijuana.

Hey, why don't you stop cockblocking,

you little Mexican b*tch.

You see, she over

here trying to get it.

Let your girl get it.

Over here, f***ing up game. Stankin' b*tch!

Mexican b*tch!

B*tch!

B*tch!

Sh*t! Let's go!

Let's go!

We are funny! We are...

Look at this b*tch!

What's that you

called my sister?

What the f***?

The f*** you are rolling up on for, cuz?

Huh? He must don't know.

He can't know.

He can't know.

I said, "Stop cockblocking,

you little Mexican b*tch!"

F***ed, my boy!

That's what I said, cuz!

This nigga got me f***ed up!

Man, show 'em what you do.

Oh, sh*t!

Hold on, nigga.

It's back here. There you go!

OG Lil' Pretty Thug, nigga!

Okay. Now what?

I'm about to put

this nigga in a box.

Don't do it. Calm down.

You know how you get.

Six feet under, nigga!

You hear me?

Funeral service! Nigga, I... It's

seven now. It's seven feet...

Nigga, I'm talking

face on a brochure!

Boy!

Lights out!

Okay! Hear me?

Clap on, clap off!

Okay!

See, you got me f***ed up, cuz.

Comeback! Comeback! Comeback!

You got me f***ed up, cuz!

Pretty Thug, nigga!

You understand? Comeback! Okay!

You don't know, ask somebody.

Okay!

Don't f*** around and get shot

by a pretty nigga, nigga!

What is he talking about?

Excuse me, what?

I said, "OG Lil'

Pretty Thug!"

Come again, say what?

I'm... I'm telling...

Oh, sh*t!

This nigga real!

This nigga real! Oh, sh*t!

Oh, sh*t.

This motherf***er is strong!

F***ing thug, nigga.

I'll kill you, b*tch!

Oh, Jesus Christ and the Latter Day Saints.

What the f***?

Bam! Get the grenade

on this nigga, man!

Get us a what?

Grenade this nigga, man!

Pray to him! Pray to him!

Put him down!

He don't deserve that.

Get this cholo, nigga!

Damn! I'm too pretty

for this sh*t.

God damn!

That nigga threw you!

Sh*t!

Oh, sh*t! Nigga!

I feel that sh*t!

Enough! Enough!

Listen to me!

Sh*t!

I always wanted to do that, eh?

Hey, Bam, grab my gun!

Excuse me, say what?

Grab my gun!

Come again, say what?

Get my gun!

I can't understand

you. Oh, sh*t!

Hey, you can't shoot a nigga

with Jesus on their face.

Now come on,

in the name of Allah!

Don't do it.

Fall back, Holmes. Fall back.

Okay!

What's that you

said about my sister?

Will about mine, cuz...

No bullets?

This motherf***er put

no bullets in his gun.

Looks like your life

is full of blanks, fool.

Hey, that's The New Boyz?

They just cut their new album.

F*** that sh*t.

Just come on, nigga!

I'm not getting up.

This nasty!

I've been f***ed up, nigga.

Y'all got me f***ed up!

All the way up.

You talking like a real gigo.

You talking like a real gigo, man.

Oh, sh*t! We made it

to World Star?

Man, that sh*t's crazy.

Hey, nigga,

I killed them niggas off.

Ain't that some good sh*t.

Hey, y'all.

Hear that, nigga.

Look whose mom finally

let him out the house.

Hey, y'all are wack.

You hating 'cause my momma care.

Ghetto-ass mama.

She care about gun play.

Did you see your little cameo

on World Star? Check it out.

Got a million views.

Is it tight?

Yo!

Loser!

Langston, can I use your

phone to call Anastacia?

Why don't you call at your crib?

Well, we don't have

a house phone.

All we got is my mom's pager.

Besides, I need the moral

support from my guys, you know?

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