Secret Admirer Page #4

She really liked it.

Did she say,

"I really like it"?

Michael, she loved it, OK?

She loved it. Whoa.

I think I ought to write her

another one. What do you think?

You think I ought to write her

another one?

Jesus.

Please, Toni,

you got to tell me who this is.

All right.

You want to meet him tonight?

- Hello?

- Hi, it's me.

Do you want to meet her tonight?

Tonight?

You mean, "tonight" tonight?

Tonight.

Yeah, sure, OK.

Does she know who I am?

No. That's why

she wants to meet you.

- I'm ready. What time?

-8:
00? McCambridge park?

OK, thanks a lot, Toni.

Thank you so much...

...and what do you think

I should wear?

A paper bag over your head.

He's all yours.

Oh, God!

Thank you so much, Toni.

You're really my best friend.

What do you think

I should wear?

Something demure.

Oh, Christian Demure.

I got tons of her stuff.

How are you?

Look, Michael,

I'm waiting for someone, OK?

- So if you don't mind...

- Yeah, well, it's me.

- What's you?

- I'm the one you're waiting for.

Michael,

I'm really not in the mood, OK?

I wrote the letters.

The ones Toni gave you.

I wrote 'em.

You?

Holy sh*t.

Last week when you kissed me...

- I never thought that-

- Neither did I.

But that letter, George...

I know, I know.

It was so filled with emotion.

- Oh, yes, it was.

- Well, maybe we should-

I don't know. Do you want to?

Maybe we should just...

...have a cup of coffee.

Coffee, that's good.

That's very good.

A cup of coffee,

that's very good.

Here.

Let me carry those books.

Oh. Thank you.

I don't drink coffee.

Neither do I.

- Are you hungry?

- Well, I am, yes.

Oh, thank you, George.

Ryan.

George Ryan.

Lousy scumbag.

Do you believe this?

No, I can't believe it.

Well, I can't stand it.

Oh, God, she's touching him!

I'm gonna kill myself.

They're waitin'

on a burger here.

How did he get

Deborah Anne Fimple?

I don't know, but if Michael

can get a date with her...

I guess it's pretty obvious

who's gonna be next in line.

Yeah, right.

Oh, God.

I mean, I have never read

anything like those letters.

I just fell in love with them.

Your feelings

are so amazingly beautiful.

And to be able to put them...

...and write them down

on paper like that...

I think you're a poet.

What did you mean

when you said...

I'd given you the greatest gift

you'd ever known?

Well...

...naturally, I was referring

to the whole giving concept.

You know, the concept of giving.

That's a wonderful concept.

God, Michael.

I just-well, you know.

And this is like...

I mean...

...what if you had never

written those letters?

I would be out with Steve

tonight.

Miguel, compadre, how you doin'?

Do you get the chili burger...

...or does this one belong

to the lovely lady?

That goes to the lady, Rog.

Thank you.

Put it down, Roger.

Debbie, you probably

don't remember me...

...but I was in your biology class

last year.

My name's Roger,

Roger Despard, Jr.

I sat in the back.

You remember me?

Roger,

do you drive a beat-up van?

That's me!

Put this in your big mouth,

you lying little sh*t!

Nice goin', G.I. Joe.

People just shouldn't

shoot their mouths off...

...about things they know

absolutely nothing about.

- What'd he say?

- It's not important.

He said I boffed

Steve Powers' brains out.

He did?

- Yeah. Toni said he did.

- Toni said he did?

What's wrong?

People just shouldn't

shoot their mouths off...

...about things

they don't know anything about.

Michael,

are you taking me to Kough Park?

Great.

I hate you, Michael.

I love you, Michael.

You know, I haven't been

up here since 1965.

Yeah. It hasn't changed much.

No, except now they know

about birth control.

Let's hope so.

Are you ever sorry

you didn't marry Ed?

Everybody thought

you two would get married...

...right after high school.

No. Not after I met Lou.

Lou was it for me.

Yeah. That's pretty much

the same for me and Connie.

I like Connie.

I like her very much.

Yeah, she's great.

She really is. And I like Lou.

The thing about Lou...

I mean,

he's just not your average...

I like Lou.

Lou likes you, too.

I'll kill 'em.

Turn on your lights, a**hole!

What the hell are you doing?

Hey, ass-

- Oh. Hiya, Steve.

- Have you seen Debbie?

- Have you seen Debbie, Lynn?

- No.

Hey, what-hey!

David, come back in here!

Steve! Steve, I have been

looking all over for you.

- Out of my way, Toni.

- What are you doing?

- She's out with another guy.

- Oh, hi, Steve.

I'm gonna find him and I'm gonna

kick the sh*t out of him.

Steve, forget Debbie.

There's lots of other girls

out there...

...who would treat you a lot better

than Debbie does.

- Yeah? Like who?

- Like me.

Can't you, uh...

...can't you feel

my heart pounding?

Yeah. You got

a pretty big heart there.

You, uh...

you wanna go somewhere?

Yeah, sure. Why not?

My car's right over there.

Let's go.

You know something, Ton?

I have always liked you.

All the classes

were over an hour ago.

Oh, I think my husband

just got home.

Thank you very much.

- Lou.

- Connie, we have to talk...

...but first you gotta promise me

you're gonna be strong.

We both have to be strong.

It's about George.

Bastards.

We shouldn't be here.

George, we shouldn't be here.

We're happily married.

You're right.

Please don't stare at me

like that.

I can't help it,

I can't help it.

You're so beautiful.

I've wanted you

ever since I first saw you...

...in your drill-team uniform.

George, why didn't you

do anything about it then?

Because...

Because I was a chickenshit.

- Oh, my God!

- I knew it. What?

- Oh, my God!

- What-I'm sorry.

My daughter is in the next car.

Oh, my God. Oh, God, oh, God.

So is my son.

- George, George.

- What?

We have to get out of here

right now.

- OK, let's go.

- Do you think they saw us?

I don't know.

- Hurry, George.

- Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God!

George, George, George, hurry.

Oh, Lou, I can't believe this.

It's OK, baby. We're gonna

put a stop to this right now.

Sh*t! We missed them.

They were right here

in this spot! Damn it!

You OK, Con?

Oh, Louis,

what are we gonna do?

I don't know, baby. I...

...don't know.

You know, I haven't been

up here since 1965.

Hasn't changed much.

After you.

So...

...this is where you live, huh?

Usually you gotta be a junior

to have a room like this.

Hey, you want a beer?

Oh, no, thanks.

You got some kind

of birth control with you...

...or do you want me

to wear a rubber?

Steve, is there

a bathroom around here?

I've got something with me.

Yeah, right there.

Yeah, Steve, wear a rubber-

wear it over your face.

Oh, sh*t.

Can you hear me in there, Toni?

I think you better

wait a minute.

Look, Toni, I don't think

this is gonna work.

I mean, I like you, I think

you're a very nice person...

...but, I mean,

it just doesn't feel right.

I mean, I'm in love with Debbie.

And I wish I wasn't, but I am.

I mean, hell,

I got feelings, too.

But I just don't think

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