Shaandaar Page #7

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Please don't separate them, Papa.

But he's not good

enough for her, my girl.

Maybe not.

But who will be suitable for Alia'?

Who will love her more than you'?

That means whoever comes along

will always be second-best, right'?

But you won't get a better

second-best than Jaginder Joginder.

What rot you talk.

There are much better boys.

Like the one you found for me'?

Like the one Grandma found for you'?

Will you let that happen to Alia too'?

If you stop her today, Dad,

Grandma will turn her into a deal too.

Will you be able to do anything then'?

Or even say anything?

You've never said a thing

but do it now. For Alia.

She's your favourite, isn't she'?

Okay, Dad, just come with me.

Come no'?

- Where?

- Come on.

Where, kid'?

Please.

Just look at them.

- Look at this empty theatre.

- That's what you call

conspicuous consumption

In a hall which can seat

two thousand, twenty people sit.

Look at that gang of gold-diggers.

- Robin, you're the man!

"Girls are fundamentally sentimental"

"That drives them mental"

"Girls are fundamentally sentimental"

"That drives them mental"

"One small step from sentimental"

"To fundamentally mental."

"One small step from sentimental"

"To fundamentally mental."

"If a mosquito bites Ma'am,"

"She takes a same of it."

"And then off it goes"

"to lnstagram".

"She knows nothing of the world."

"Into herself she stays curled"

"May the Lord protect us from girls"

"From their curls

and whorls and pearls."

I'm in love!

"They're a bundle of fake notes"

"They're a lot of cancelled votes."

"One small step from sentimental"

"To fundamentally mental."

"One small step from sentimental"

"To fundamentally mental."

"Words of love come

from a man's mouth"

"But his true feelings

lie somewhat south."

"it's not his heart that's beating."

"it's his trousersnake

that's bleating."

"Words of love come

from a man's mouth"

"But his true feelings

lie somewhat south."

"it's not his heart that's beating."

"it's his trousersnake

that's bleating."

"His biceps may be

big but what of it?"

"His brain is pea-sized

and totally full of it."

"Oh Lord, Lord, show them

what they look like."

"Men are mistakes"

"That women make."

"Men are mistakes"

"That women make."

"They call us mental

when they're the same."

"They call us mental

when they're the same."

"All this make up that

you slap on your face"

"If a man won't turn round,

it's a disgrace"

"Just a disgrace"

"Just a disgrace"

"Oh right, and as if your big car"

"Doesn't tell me what a prig you are."

"it's not just a symbol of your money"

"It tells me what you

don't got down there, honey."

"The world's a bus-stop"

"Girls come and go."

"If you miss one "

"Another will show"

"Be careful how many buses you drop."

"You may end up sleeping

at the bus stop"

"You'd better stop such silly talk"

"Or you might be forced to walk."

"Even God was rather

startled with His creation."

"Women are His miracle,

men are his fraud"

"A daughter is someone

else's property"

"Better that than being

black money as a man can be."

"Better that than being

black money as a man can be."

"Better that than being

black money as a man can be."

"Our case is strong,

our point is made"

"Our case is strong,

our point is made"

"Go wash your face,

your rouge may fade."

"Men are only footwear

for women's use."

"Men are only footwear

for women's use."

"They say we're mental"

"But these aren't gentlemen"

"They're mistakes, these mental men"

"I may be the sandal but

I have to take your weight"

"I would try to be your beloved hero"

"No size zero!"

"No size zero!"

"Look at the match made for me."

"The bride's not a patch on me."

"I'm a medium and my

bride is an extra large."

"As big as a barge."

"Do you think you

have the gait of a deer?"

"You're the entire

herd in kilotons, I fear."

"Your waist is a waste of space"

"It takes up all the space."

"This isn't a match."

"it's a scam."

"And I've been stuck"

"In a jam."

"This isn't a match."

"it's a scam."

"And I've been stuck"

"In a jam."

"Now that things have

come to this pass."

"I'm begging you:

let's end this farce."

"You have nothing in

you of the wife I seek"

"You'll make my future

look very bleak."

"Such a deal will make me feel"

"a total heel"

"Marrying a woman who's a disgrace"

"To the entire feminine race."

"Get thee to a nunnery."

"Here's what I would like to know?'

"What makes you so keen on size zero?"

"And take one look at your own face."

"You're not the Brad

Pitt of the Sindhi race."

"If your mother were

a little overweight"

"Would you change her

for someone who looked great?"

"Or would you end your

relationship with her?"

"Would you let your

love simply wither?"

"What's fat?"

"A workout can deal with that."

"You'll still be a misogynistic prat."

"A man who disses women"

"shames the entire nation."

"A man who disses women"

"shames the entire nation."

"He who shames a woman"

"shames his mum by implication"

"You're a shame to

your constellation."

"So what if your

face makes babies cry?"

"You can say nice

things and make a try"

"At pretending to

be part of humanity."

"I offer my condolences

to the house of your birth"

"They must regret your

turning up on the earth."

I won't let them insult me like that.

Are you mad'?

We're on the rocks now.

I don't want to marry.

If the Arora deal is called off, your

protein shakes will also be called off.

Go, ask for pardon.

Do it for your bro.

Come on.

That's it.

Go, Bro!

"I'm wrong and I confess."

"Girls are perfect, I'm a mess."

"I'm wrong and I confess."

"Girls are perfect, I'm a mess."

"Gods ultimate creation is a woman."

"Girls represent the

link between man and God"

"Girls are perfect

and I'm a stupid clod."

"I'm wrong and I confess."

"Girls are perfect, I'm a mess."

I'm over here, you imbecile.

Yes.

I have this to deal with

here and Bipin over there...

He almost ruined the deal yesterday.

What are you doing?

The air-conditioning

is on so the fan...

Always arguing.

Let me get this wedding done...

...and then I'll get you married,

my boysie-woysie.

Never mind. Show me the saris.

Can't do anything right.

How do you like this, Mummyji'?

I wouldn't give it to the servant.

This is something else, Mummyji.

Heaven forefend.

This one is the best, Mummy.

What is this manure'?

Mummyji, why talk about

such things when you're eating.

It's my mouth and I'll

use it the way I like.

Sloppy designer!

Yuck, Mummy.

Don't you yuck me, you upstart.

Come here and get yours. Come here.

Come here, you.

Come here, now.

MummYJ-i-

- Come here. Now.

- You're disobeying me'?

My lovely prince.

- Come here.

- No

- You coming or not'?

- No, Mummyji

- You coming or not'?!

- Mummyji

MummYJ-i-

Sorry Mummy.

Mummyji'?

Mummyji'?

Mummyji'?

Mummy. . .tee hee heel

Nonsense. Stop it.

Enough of this.

First we have to tell the Fundwanis.

No. Never.

A death in the family

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