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Shotgun Wedding Page #7
- UNRATED
- Year:
- 2013
- 92 min
- 759 Views
I was speculating earlier!
Robert, I-- I swear I'm not
here to ruin the wedding.
Declan--
Robert, I swear
on my life.
I'm so sorry.
I'm a friend.
This guy's--
Some friend!
I'm sorry.
Robert.
[ Gasps ]
Jesus-- Oh, God!
What are you
planning?
Why do you hate
American freedoms?
[ Gasps ]
I don't. I'm from England.
We're allies.
These colors don't run,
terrorist.
What?
Oh, good Lord.
You do know our flags
are the same colors.
You f***in'... motherf***er!
- [ Stammering ]
No! No! No!
- [ Crackling ]
- [ Screaming ]
[ Laughing ]
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
[ Laughing ]
[ Groaning ]
Stop!
Stop it!
All right!
I admit it!
I-- I'm here to
steal Rosemary back.
- What?
- Oh, yeah.
I was on my way
to convince her
to run away with me,
you boring sot!
You were always
so nice to me.
Well, I was playing you
for a fool,
you twat!
Soldier.
Huh?
Detain this man
till after the ceremony.
It would be
my pleasure.
R-Robert, no. Help.
You have to help me.
Are you
f***ing kidding me?
Rodrigo is the best.
So how many stiffs
you got, woman?
Sully!
[ Yvette ]
Just the two.
Get the f*** over here.
We had to fold her in
and kind of pushed her down.
You want to pick her up
by the torso. Come on.
Okay, don't--
don't react.
Just... look at this.
[ Both Grunting ]
You got her?
Grab-- Oh!
Here, I got her leg.
I got her leg.
Is that chick
f***in' dead?
Shh! Don't--
Just you and me,
Harry Potter.
[ Grunting ]
Just me and you,
boy.
Don't. Don't!
[ Crackling ]
[ Groaning ]
[ Yvette ]
Okay, now help me--
We gotta call the cops.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Or...
we could keep shooting.
[ Screams ]
[ Gasping ]
Oh, you limeys
are such pussies.
Back in the corps,
we used to shock ourselves
for fun!
[ Crackling ]
[ Groans ]
happening here at
the Milton's family wedding.
We're getting it
on H.D., man!
Do you have any idea
how much we could sell
this doc for?
I'm kinda thinking
that this could be
Oscar nomination material, man.
You're naughty!
Here I come!
Oh, no, no! Uh-oh!
like those journalists
who gained the trust...
of criminals or--
or warlords.
[ Gasping ]
Hello?
Hello!
You think
we're in danger?
Definitely.
[ Both Laughing ]
I mean,
where's Blaze?
[ Chuckling ]
Oh, Blaze is--
halfway home.
Sent him early with some
incriminating footage to,
you know, ensure our safety.
Oh, you're
a genius, Steve.
A genius.
Yeah, I know.
Tell me about it, bro.
One, two, three--
Oh!
There you are!
What in holy hog's hell...
am I paying
you clowns for?
I mean, here you are,
diddling around.
My daughter, the bride--
You remember
meeting her?
There's not
a single camera
on her.
Extremely sorry,
Judge Milton.
Sully, why don't you
hop up and go grab some
Rosemary footage? Okay?
What I am paying
you two goons,
this better be
the best damn
wedding video ever.
[ Steve ]
It's gonna be killer.
Steve thinks we'll get
an Oscar nomination for it.
What the hell
are you talking about?
Nothin'.
Hair of the dog, buddy.
Yeah. Come on. Let me hear.
You ready to ush the sh*t
out of this wedding, buddy?
Hell, yeah, I am.
I was born to ush sh*t.
Hell, yeah! Come on!
Ush! Ush! Ush! U--
You guys part of
the wedding?
Yeah. We're ushers.
- Hey, you're the priest!
- I'm a pastor.
Sorry.
Okay, you guys, uh--
Point me in the direction
of the bride and groom.
My Jag, it's been acting up.
Oh, yeah, about that--
the groom's missing.
We're keeping that
on the D.L., though,
so, you know... be cool?
Yeah, I'm cool.
I get paid by the hour.
Right. See-- Hey!
F.Y.I., the guests are
starting to seat themselves.
I'll be in the bar.
Priest
just took my beer.
[ Pop ]
[ Steve ]
Rosemary? Rosemary.
My future honey,
um, is--
I hope that I can find you
so that we can
actually get married.
And then all will be well
and... we'll be in love,
and hopefully, uh--
Have you guys seen him, or--
Not happening?
Uh, no. I don't know.
I mean, what do you guys want?
Love you, bunny.
It's a long way home
But, ah, we can make it
I'm not sure if it's going.
Is the red light on?
Uh, I don't know.
Where's the red light
supposed to be? Hold on.
I-- Is it on? The l--
There's a red spot on the lens.
It's a red light.
Okay, hold on. Red light,
red light, red light.
They got so many buttons
I'm gonna try this.
Uh, yeah, I think that's it.
I think I got it.
I think it's going.
Oh. Hey. That doesn't
look too bad, does it?
That looks great.
You look pretty good too.
[ Chuckling ]
Hi. Hi!
[ Chuckles ]
Okay, we got 10 minutes.
We gotta go quick.
We gotta make this quick.
[ Hank ]
You know how to--
That was great.
Game face, b*tch.
We got, like, three choices
for dinner tonight.
Yeah.
[ Exhales ]
The beef--
Yeah, that's good. That's good.
The beef is good.
Real good beef!
Mm-hmm!
That's good beef.
Uh--
Yes?
Uh, who is it?
It's Steve.
- Could I come in
for a minute?
- Oh, uh, no.
Um, I-I can't come
to the door right now.
I'm, um-- I'm--
Having sex,
for Pete's sake!
[ Laughs ]
Hank!
Yeah, okay. Well--
I kinda feel like
it's important
that I speak to you.
Oh, for God's sake--
About the dead bodies
in your room?
Now, I know that you killed
the maid of honor
and my cameraman.
I've got the footage.
But-But I'm not here to
get you guys in trouble. Okay?
I just--
I want to talk to you.
Hey.
Come on in.
Okay--
No! Jesus.
Okay, wait,
wait, wait.
Just-- Just wait.
All right?
You've got
the wrong idea.
Okay? I'm not--
I'm not gonna
tell anyone.
I'm here
under official capacity.
You know,
videographer-client
privilege.
Plus, I've not gotten
any footage of you,
Yvette, in that dress.
So back then we lived
in a house with Robert
and four other guys.
Three bedrooms.
This tiny house.
And--
Oh.
Hey, Rosemary.
Sorry.
Have you guys
seen Robert?
No--
I'm sorry.
Did you check his room?
Yes.
I'm going insane!
Dude, can you not
film me right now?
I mean it!
F***, she's fast.
[ Exhales ]
"Everybody makes mistakes.
We need to forgive
and forget.
And forgive.
And forget.
And forgive
and forget."
[ Footsteps ]
Rosemary.
Oh, Robert. Quick.
Come with me.
Where are we going?
Just keep up.
What's wrong?
Are they coming?
[ Coughing ]
I'm not taking anyone's side.
I'm just saying it doesn't seem
that important who Rosemary
chooses as her maid of honor,
'cause I'm gonna spend
the rest of my life in prison.
- [ Barking ]
- [ Elizabeth ]
Don't be so dramatic!
And shut the door.
It reeks of puke in here!
[ Sighs ]
stress-free on her wedding day.
That's why it's so very,
very important to choose
the right maid of honor.
Right, Mika?
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"Shotgun Wedding" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 30 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/shotgun_wedding_18055>.
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