Sisters Page #4

No. What? I don't.

Major cult stuff. Yeah.

What, like a mass murder?

Seven? Okay.

Seven sets of twins.

So, 14. I'm sorry. What?

You know your cousin's gay, right?

That's not my cousin. That's my husband.

That's your husband?

You're gonna have some surprising

sh*t go down in about 10 years.

You ever feel like maybe

you peaked too soon?

No, I don't. 'Cause its a long life.

And I would hate to see you

out there blowing hobos at 40.

Thank you.

Blue?

What would possess a person

to paint stained wood blue?

What, were you raised on a tugboat?

I'll drop off the paint later.

Unless you'll be day-napping.

We sleep with our

eyes open, like sharks.

Bye! Nice to meet you!

Smell you later.

What kind of last name is Geernt?

Geernt. Sounds like a

queef on a yoga ball.

Yeah. More like the last sound you

hear before you sh*t your pants.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Okay. Let's start

working on those invites.

Okay, let's see who we got. Okay.

- Vicka Bastione.

- Yeah.

No on Alex. He's always

on. It's annoying as f***.

I know. He breaks my heart.

He wants to be funny, though.

Yeah, well, people in

hell want ice water, too.

Dave. I did him because he

disgusted me in a sexy way.

Short Hispanic guys always

acted like I was Xena.

I bet he has, like, 50 DUls right now.

Brinda is a hard no.

That monster and her

minions are not coming.

Why is she a monster?

She knows what she did.

Okay. Rob and Liz!

They used to have sex

in the weirdest places.

He took her from behind

in line at graduation.

They could use a party.

They are terminally suburban.

Kelly. That b*tch is fun.

Yeah. Kelly is fun!

Kelly is fun.

So, we should go! We have so much to do.

You have to invite that cute

guy from down the street.

Mmm. Maybe. I don't know. We'll see.

Have a great day, Fran.

Oh, my God. It's Brinda.

Ugh...

Brinda always looks like she

has a fart coming out sideways.

I feel bad that we didn't invite her.

I hate it when people aren't included.

Oh, God. What if she asks

us to come to the party?

I'm not gonna be able

to say no to her face.

You know I can't reject people.

I have a dog with one eye.

Here she comes. She's coming

close. She's right here.

She's almost here. She's here now.

Hey, Brinda. What up'?

Well, well, well.

I thought I saw the Ellis sisters.

Hey, Brinda. What have you been up to?

Not party-wise, just life in general.

Not much. Just, you

know, building a career.

Being successful and having a

really full and wonderful life.

I'm very blessed.

I'm sure you've seen around town,

I'm a pretty successful realtor now.

I'm plastered all over the bus stops.

Congratulations. Thank you.

I thought you were missing. I

saw your picture on the bus stop.

I just assumed you were missing.

And you? What are you up to'? Nothing?

We are on the way to a shelter

to give people this party food.

Oh, is that why you're

dressed like the homeless?

What are you buying? Stool softener?

No. Actually, um, Diet Coke.

Got some Poise Pads in there I see.

Good. Little a**hole cream. No.

Don't you look great.

That's a snazzy belt.

Oh, thank you!

Yeah, congrats on your

wrestling championship.

It's Ralph Lauren.

Is that how you say it? Uh, yeah.

Do you get good Wi-Fi with that?

So I see you're having a party.

I mean, we're just kind of picking...

Yep. Having a party. Yeah.

I heard you were having a party.

From someone who got invited.

You were on our list, but

you're very hard to track down.

Are you on email?

Uh, it's

B- dot-rinda...

That's what I did

wrong. I forgot the dot.

And we forgot to type it.

And also we didn't send it.

I must admit,

when I heard you were

having an Ellis Island party

I was like, "What? What year is it?"

It's pretty sad.

It used to hurt me when you never

invited me to any of your parties,

but I did a lot of thinking

and a little bit of prayer,

and now I just feel

sort of bad for you two.

You know, because it's

such a desperate event.

Bye.

You're a desperate event!

I can still hear you!

Good. Can you hear this?

Suck a f***ing bag of d*cks!

She can't hear that.

Strutting around Big Lots

like it's Bloomingdale's

in her bullshit shoes.

Real estate b*tch

acting like Suze Orman.

You know what she has?

Crabs in her eyebrows.

Tumbleweeds rolling across her beav.

I am done wasting words on that ho.

I'm sorry, Vicky.

Don't apologize for me.

Is Vicky your real name?

What's your Korean name?

Hae-Won.

Hae-Won. What a beautiful

name. What does that mean?

Hae-Won mean "head".

Oh.

Has-Won? Am I saying it correctly?

Hae-Won.

Oh, Hae-Won.

No. Hae-Won.

Hae-Won.

Not Hae-Won.

Hae-Won.

Hae-Won.

No. Hae-Won.

Hae-Won.

Hae-Won.

Hae-Won.

Hae-Won.

I feel like I'm saying it right. No?

I'm too high.

Hae-Hae-Won.

Yes.

It's not coming out

right, but I'll get it.

Like, "I'm having fun at party."

"Hey." Plus "one."

Hey one.

- So you like parties.

- Yes.

Hmm.

Your name? Oh, my name is Maura.

Maura.

Watch me. Maura.

Maura.

I don't open my mouth

like that. Just, Maura.

Maura.

It's not Maura.

You see the difference

in my mouth? Maura.

Maura.

We have different mouths.

It's okay.

Why do they always have to give

them American names? It's so sad.

I bet Nail Pimp Daddy over there

treats them like his whores.

We need to get Lucy Liu

to go under... Lisa Ling.

Lisa Ling to go undercover and

investigate these dirty-ass nail salons.

But they are hiring and you

are licensed to do nails.

I don't wanna work here. They

have a bass in their aquarium.

It's beautiful here.

Everything smells like lavender.

Plus, you could teach them a

lot, because you know your sh*t.

I do know my sh*t.

I could French manicure a

chicken while it was running away.

Guess I could get something

better once we're settled, right?

Exactly! And then just wait

until you get that better job

before you quit this one.

I'm open to new ways.

Your sister?

Yes, that's my sister.

You're older.

No. Yes.

Why would you say that?

Your face.

Oh.

Older.

No. Yes.

Okay.

So, do you like working here?

I love it.

Do you get proper lunch breaks?

What is lunch?

Oh, my God. That's terrible.

Hey.

Thank you so much for

this. This is a great place.

Of course.

Success is Desire in Action

So, uh, I see you're hiring.

Oh, we are not hiring right now.

You just got a big old sign.

Hey, Hae-Won. Would you like

to come to a party tonight?

You and your friends come, okay?

To do nail?

Oh, no. No, no, no. Party?

You can bring whoever you want.

Party, yes.

Sojus. Jews.

Soju there? Sure.

There'll be Jews there.

Love jus. Koreans love jus.

Koreans love Jews.

I love jus. I love Jews, too.

Jus.

Adam is thinking of coming,

and Gabe is on the fence, so...

Soju.

I'm worried we aren't

talking about the same thing.

- Juice. Drinking juice.

- Jus.

You stupid.

There'll be juice there. There'll be

food there. There'll be Jews there.

Okay. Yes. Great.

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