Sisters Page #7

Drink up and run with scissors

tonight, because Mama got you.

Aw, Sh*t!

Yeah, Mama!

Now, go call your sitters!

But what should we call them?

Alex is still funny, guys.

Thanks. I'm pouring shots.

Now remind me that you

know how to do this. Whoo!

I remember how to do it!

And let's dance our titties off!

Shot, shot, shot!

Next round, vodka!

Have you done it?

Only people with children.

People with kids. People with kids.

Hey!

That's a really beautiful

orchid. Is that for me?

No, this is mine.

Maura. Invite Doctor Bushwhack in.

Show him where to put

his things. I'll greet.

Uh, please come in, and take off your...

Just come in.

There you go.

Oh, thank you. No problem.

It's beautiful. Thank you.

Wow. It smells amazing.

Do orchids smell?

They can, if you get fungus gnats.

And those are hard to get rid

of. It stinks up your whole house.

But this one looks good.

Yeah, this is pretty healthy.

Why don't you greet your guests?

I'm gonna make myself a

drink, and face the wall.

Cover time. Twenty bucks for

the booze and food, please.

Kate. The lesbians are here.

Excellent.

Hey. Cool if I spin some tunes?

I'm afraid to tell you no.

Great. Great.

Let them through, everybody!

Get ready for a Sarah

McLachlan/Tracy Chapman mash-up.

Oh, yeah!

Oh, sh*t.

Can I talk to you for a second? Yeah.

How's it going in there?

Well, I told him about my fungus gnats.

Let him do the bulk of the talking.

Yeah, I'm just afraid

when it gets quiet.

Good things are hidden in the quiet.

Who said that?

I did. I'm smart.

Okay.

You should put that

on one of your cards.

But it is expected of you. Your

absence has already been noted.

The boy means nothing to me.

I can't stand the wailing of women.

God, I could watch Tyrion slap the smug

off that little f***er's

face a hundred times

and never get sick of it.

Did you know that Jack Gleeson was

the little boy in Batman Begins?

Jean, when you use

the actors' real names,

you're not allowing yourself

to live inside the fantasy world

that they've so lovingly crafted for us.

Oh, and just a reminder there's a no

phone policy on our G. O. T. Nights.

I'm sorry.

Ian Mitchell keeps posting

photos of the Ellis Island party,

and it looks like kinda damn fun.

I kinda wanna drop by.

They have cheese.

Cheese.

All we have is wine.

And it's non-alcoholic.

We don't have to take

off our shoes there.

And there aren't so many rules.

I'll take another one...

Hey. Hey.

Man, I haven't been

to a party in a while.

I know. The last party I went to

was probably my wedding reception.

This wine... So did you

see your parents die?

No, I didn't,

but I know they did.

Well, that's good to know.

It's not good to know.

Hey, it's okay.

I mean, you can ask me anything.

What do you want to know about me?

I have nachos that are in the broiler.

I have to go get them.

Yeah, go. Do your thing. I'll be here.

All right. All right.

What are you doing out here by

yourself? Where's your boyfriend'?

No, I don't think he's

right for me. It's a pass.

He's so direct' you know.

There's no surprises there.

There's not a lot to discover.

I mean, I like mystery.

And, you know, great sex is

so distracting. I mean, it's...

It's nice to be... Mmm-hmm...

so physically, emotionally

attracted to someone.

Uh-huh. Yeah.

But that's not what life is.

Life is about challenges and shadows

and corners and feeling weird.

You are so full of sh*t, that

I'm gonna buy you Pull-Ups.

I just think we're gonna

be very good friends.

I think you're being a

little dramatic. I'm not.

I asked him if he saw his parents die.

Oh, Jesus.

Yeah. I don't like this

feeling. What feeling?

This high school feeling when

you're crushing on someone

and you're afraid that they're

not gonna like you back,

and then you're gonna get heart cramps.

Hey, I think you're

getting ahead of yourself.

Someone else is talking to him anyway.

Brinda?

Oh, hail naw!

Are you serious? Because

I am straight-up baffled.

I'm sorry?

I believe you called this party

a "sad and desperate event"?

Well, I just figured I'd pop

in and say hello to everyone.

I mean, we're all adults now, right?

Nice try. On your bike, b*tch.

Get your peanut butter out

of my sister's chocolate.

Wow.

I respect your jumpsuit,

but not its contents. Hit it.

Well, this is ludicrous.

Get out.

Fine. I have another

function to attend anyway.

Besides, I flushed a

tampon down your toilet.

You're pads all the way

and everyone knows it.

Nuh-uh.

Let's go. Let's get

out of this septic tank.

I kind of want to stay a little.

Yeah, me too.

For serious?

We never got to go before

because Kate hated you.

We suffered from secondhand hate.

Wow.

Hi. You guys are welcome

here. You know that, right?

Do you wanna do some shots? Yeah.

Hi, I'd like to make a noise complaint.

Winter is coming, b*tches.

- So, what's this order again?

- All right.

It goes salt.

Shot.

And then we suck on these?

No, you throw them at each other.

That's the way you're supposed to.

Maura? That's what...

Some guy here to see you?

Excuse me.

All right. Go do it.

My dude's in the bedroom. What dude?

Some kid we're buying weed from.

Ooh, okay.

Hi, there.

Holy mother.

That's right. This is my

best friend, my brah, right?

This is Pazuzu.

It sure is.

Pazuzu. Thank you so much

for bringing your arms here.

Your drugs here.

Uh, is your ink Samoan'?

I saw a documentary once...

I will handle this.

We are looking for... To buy drugs.

What'chu want?

I got ketamine, meth, MDMA, Adderall,

Bromo-Dragonfly, heroin,

coke, crack, codeine, oxys,

percs, vikes,

PCP, LSD, Dilaudid, mescaline,

mushrooms, bath salts,

cortisone, Toradol.

I got molly. I got her sister

Sandra. I got big Frank.

I got birth control. I got Plan B.

I got that morphine from

China they took off the market.

Sh*t to make your click hard.

Sh*t to make your dick

soft. Sh*t'll find your dick.

That sh*t there's from Kenya.

Supposed to be a scurvy

cure for silverback gorillas,

but for humans, it just makes

them violently masturbate.

Did I say crack? Because

I got more of that, too.

Mmm-hmm. You said crack already.

I got some Ibuprofen, aspirin. I

got Flintstone Gummies if you want.

You seem good at your job.

We don't need any of that. No. No.

We're just gonna take some

low-level, late '80s dirt pot.

You know, the kind with seeds in

it that you separate on a Frisbee.

Something you smoke

at a Bangles concert.

I didn't drive my ass across town to

sell some moms some f***ing dirt pot.

Y'all gonna buy some Cloud 10.

I'm sorry, man. They're

just new to the game.

Ladies, come on. This is Cloud 10.

This is the shiz, a'ight?

This is, like, 70% molly, 20%

Adderall, and it's 10% fun!

What's that last 10%?

Snow leopard. Fun.

No, seriously. I'm a nurse.

So, just give me a name.

Mystic. I actually don't know.

You know what? You seem like a pro,

so we'll just take a little ohwheed

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