Sleeping with the Fishes Page #7

professionals only.

Wait, wha...

But you just said that you

loved my professionalism.

- We smiled.

- Yeah, I did,

but that was before I was

referred to as a muncher.

Oh, like I'm really that far off.

Can I just...

do you remember when I wanted to quit

real estate classes what you said to me?

You said that you can't

fail if you finish.

I stole that from a self-help video.

Whatever, Lexi, damn, I'm just saying

that you can't let Daniel, and Mom,

and your f***ing insecurities

dictate your life.

Ladies, I hate to do this,

but if you could take your

after-school special outside,

that would be great.

I'm trying to conduct a business here.

Lex... Thank you.

By the way, I'm not phobic.

I just prefer brunettes.

- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

Excuse me.

Um, question.

Is this animal-safe?

It's not tested on animals,

if that's what you mean.

Yeah, I get that...

I'm asking if you can use it on animals.

I don't know.

Really helpful, you can just begin...

you can just package

all that up right there.

- Hello?

- Alexis.

Uh, hi, this is Mrs. Wasserstein,

and I am calling with some bad...

some awful news.

Apparently, my very defiant daughter

has taken it upon herself to cancel

her very own Bat Mitzvah.

Wait, wait, wait, what, why? Why?

She, uh, has made up her mind,

and is adamant about wearing a dress

that I feel is completely inappropriate

for a young lady to wear

on such a special occasion.

Well, and... like, maybe if

I can talk to her, I can...

Oh, she won't listen to anybody.

- Oh.

- Inappropriate?

As if she thinks I have fat knees

and she doesn't want to be embarrassed

in front of all her friends.

Give me that!

Uh...

okay, well, then, I guess I

just have some calls to make,

and... good luck to you and Shari.

Yes, well, that's why

we're in therapy together.

Best of luck to you as well.

Hold your horses! I'm coming!

- Hey, buddy.

- Hey, Alexis.

Um, is my dad expecting

you or something?

Uh, no.

I just was in the neighborhood,

and I needed some milk.

Okay.

Well, he's in his office, so...

Okay, great, thanks.

Now, I gotta get back to

kicking some Grand Theft butt!

Awesome.

I've waited too long

for us to be together again.

What happened to the passion,

our dreams, our love for each other?

I can't afford to get

myself wrapped up again

in all of your drama.

Look, you know I'll always have

a special place in my heart for you.

But with everything that's

happened, I can't take that risk.

But you promised.

You said that if I

could figure out a way

to get rid of James, then

our lives would change,

and I did.

I did what you asked of me.

What more do you want from me?

Nothing!

That's just it.

Are you really going to say no to me?

Look at what I'm offering you.

Oh...

Hey, you.

I didn't know you were dropping by.

Uh, yeah, I, um... I tried calling.

Yeah, my... my phone is in the charger.

- Yeah, we were just...

- You know what?

I'm actually... I'm gonna go.

I'm gonna go because I have to go.

Um, but it was nice meeting you.

I don't think we actually met.

You are...

Leaving.

You must've missed the

cash-for-clunkers program.

You could've traded that one

in for some good pocket change.

- Do not do that.

- Do what?

Tell the truth?

Dad?

Hey. Baby girl, you okay?

I don't know.

I'm sorry I pulled you

out of your meeting.

No worries, I already know the

hidden truth behind the hidden tooth.

And to be perfectly honest, you saved me

from having to drive Stan

Krieger back to Jersey.

So... talk to me, Lexi.

What's got your feathers all ruffled up?

The Bat Mitzvah's off.

Oh, no.

Oh, I'm so sorry, Lexi.

I honestly don't know

what to do anymore, Dad.

What happened?

Mrs. Wasserstein is set on torturing

and controlling her daughter

for the rest of her life.

Okay, then.

What about Shari?

She's not talking to anyone.

I don't... I don't even know what

I would say to her if I could.

Well, you could say

that she's missing out

on a really big thing in life.

It's really a big deal

and that there's nothing

worse than regret.

And you also could

tell her you have a mom.

You understand her frustrations.

You could tell her that it's all going

to work itself out in the end.

It always does, Lexi.

You know that, right?

Yeah.

Now sometimes, you

have to fight the fight

to get what you want.

- You want it?

- I do.

Then go and get it.

You've done it before.

And remember... the Fish

family are not quitters.

Now, we tend to come in last a lot,

but we do not quit.

Talk to Shari.

I really think this will be a

good thing for the both of you.

- You're probably right.

- I am.

And you know, it won't hurt for you

to talk to your own mom too.

Tell her the truth about Daniel...

Dad... Dad.

She deserves to know.

Give her the benefit of the doubt, Lexi.

You know, she does mean well.

It just sometimes comes across

in a lovingly brutal way, you know?

Is it even worth the risk?

Yeah, everything in

life is worth the risk.

It's just up to you to figure out

if it's important enough

for you to take it.

Yeah, I guess you're right.

I am.

- Hey.

- Mm.

- Good morning.

- Where's Dad?

At the store.

Those look gross.

Oh, no.

Liliana's about to seduce

her husband's killer.

No, Mom, please not today,

not today, please not today.

I wasn't going to say anything,

but please, just put my show back on.

Look at her.

She's perfect.

I bet you she never

goes out of the house

- without her makeup on.

- She doesn't.

So your father tells

me that the Bat Mitzvah

has been cancelled... what happened?

Shari's mom wants her

to get another dress,

but Shari refuses, so...

And that's it? It's just about a dress?

So why doesn't Shari just listen

to what her mother asks

and pick another dress?

I don't know, she's a pre-teen.

They never listen to their mothers.

It's not just the pre-teens, hija.

Anyway...

I thought maybe I'd go over there today

and try to convince her to get

the party back on. You know?

I don't want her to miss

her Bat Mitzvah. It'd suck.

I don't think it's

your place to interfere

with a mother and her child.

As I have always said,

no one knows what's in the chicken soup

except the chicken and the chef.

The one thing I agree with you on, Mom.

Well, then let it be.

Let those two figure out

what their differences are

before you stick your

beak into their business.

Easier said than done, don't you think?

Nobody likes a sticky beak, Lexita.

Let them worry about their problems,

and you worry about yours.

Well...

if that's the way you feel,

then I've been meaning to

talk to you about something.

Oh, oh, no, no, un momento, please.

Uh, you know what?

That's... that's no worries.

No, no, no... oh, please, Lexitmira.

It's just that I have been waiting

so long for this moment...

Tell me about it.

Okay, I'm sorry, sit down.

Talk to me... what is

it you want to tell me?

Okay. Ahem.

All right, okay.

- In going with your... Mom.

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