Spring Forward Page #6

My neighbor.

He comes and tells me, in my house...

...my son Bobby can't be scoutmaster

for Cub Scouts, because he's gay.

My neighbor.

Seen the kid grow up for 20 years.

He says, "I represent the Boy Scouts

of America and the town."

I say, "Regan...

"...we're talking about Bobby."

He looks at me with tears in his eyes.

Tears in his eyes! And he says:

"I'm sorry, Murph.

"I'm just not comfortable

having them around the boys."

"Them."

He wouldn't cross the line.

He had to, for the boys' own sake.

Didn't want to. He had to.

My God.

I carried his daughter to the doctor,

five streets away...

...when she tipped the barbecue over on her.

I'm running five streets...

...her in my arms, screaming.

Bobby cut his lawn for six years.

I don't know.

I can't offer you applejack, so...

- You got a light?

- Yeah.

I know. I'm supposed to hold it in, right?

Jesus.

Nice one, Murph.

You sort of just go with the flow there,

don't you?

In 15 minutes you're gonna be craving

ice cream or coffee.

You know what the doctor told me?

Go easy on fat. Cut down on coffee.

Now they tell me. I'd rather skip

the last 30 years than start up now.

What have you got

once you give up coffee and ice cream?

- There's always sex.

- I hope there's always sex.

God, me too.

You ever think about what it must be like to be...

...sixty...

You know...

Eighty years old.

Knowing the last time...

That the last time that you...

F***ed?

Knowing the last time you f***ed,

that was the last time.

You are never gonna do it again.

- I wonder if you relish it.

- God, I hope you relish it.

I mean, what a...

- Drag?

- Thank you.

...drag it would be! I mean, relish it.

I just hope I die a little younger,

so I don't rot down to nothing.

I don't want to see my friends die.

- Suppose your wife goes first.

- I've thought about that.

I don't see a point thinking about it.

- I can't control what will or won't happen.

- Right.

This book says if your partner dies first...

Wait. "Partner"?

Partner. Husband. Wife.

Boyfriend. Significant other.

Partner.

- So, if your partner dies first...

- You have to have a contract with this?

No.

Agreement would do. A simple handshake.

Okay.

So...

- Lf your partner dies...

- For a cowboy, would it be your pardner?

Jesus.

In a few minutes, you'll have the worst...

...coffee jones of your entire life.

I got a hankerin' right now.

- Hankerin'?

- Yeah.

Let's stop off at Bagelrama.

On the way on 35.

So, if your...

What?

So, they say...

I forget what I was saying.

Partner!

They say that if your partner dies first...

...sometimes the ethereal body

will stick around in the house...

...because the partner still has issues...

...with the survivor to take care of

before he can accept death.

To let go of that fear.

Fear of dying.

Like a ghost?

Sort of.

Except more like her energy field.

Her spirit.

Then you can continue

that relationship based on...

...all your time together...

...in sync...

...as...

...temporal beings.

Temporal beings?

In the body,

while you're still alive, in your bodies.

You know so much about her energy

and she of yours.

The relationship keeps going on.

That's memory.

Right.

How long have you been married?

Forty-five years.

You...

...never f***ed around?

No.

Well, twice.

That's f***ing around. Once would be.

It was during the war. We all did it.

You were going crazy!

You get married,

finally find out what it's all about.

Go into service,

they expect you to do without for two years?

We were going nuts.

They were nice girls, though.

A porn star, I could screw.

I don't know about a whore.

You're obviously a man of discerning tastes.

One time...

...when my brother died in Ohio.

My wife is sick.

I went to the funeral by myself. Cancer.

I felt weak.

I don't know,

I wanted to dissolve into the ground.

My kid brother.

Anyway, I'm driving around

in this kind of run-down...

...section there. Dayton.

I don't know what I'm doing.

I knew what I was doing.

I was looking for a woman.

I mean...

I never told this to anybody.

So I'm driving. It's a warehouse district.

This woman waves at me and gets to the car.

She asks me if I want a date.

They say that so if you're a cop,

and you say yes...

...then they can say:

"All I wanted was a date.

Suddenly he's all over me."

Right.

I don't know what to do.

I look at her. I look at the steering wheel.

What do I say to her? "My brother's dead"?

What's that mean to her?

She says to me:

"I could blow you right here for $15."

"Or we get a room, you do me any way you want.

That's $30, plus the room."

What'd you do?

For a minute I'm thinking, "Do it."

Only...

...I don't know this woman.

Nothing meaningful's gonna happen.

When you're young, sex is like...

You see it and just...

But a few years go by and...

...there's gotta be something more...

...that's bigger than sex.

Like jokes.

Laugh together.

There's gotta be something out there that's...

...more important than just a physical thing.

Gotta be connected.

Murph.

You're stoned.

Sometimes, I can hear my brother

like he's standing next to me.

"You ought to be a poet."

How do you be a poet?

How do you be anything?

I feel like once you figure out

how to make a living...

...there's never time to...

Live?

Right.

He said something to me once

I think about every autumn.

This Indian language he knew...

...from this tribe up in New England...

...where we grew up, near lthaca...

...the word that they had for "poetry"...

...was the same word they had for "breath."

So, breathing was like making a poem.

Maybe that's why they didn't have books.

What do you mean?

I mean...

...breathing is the same as poetry...

...and you're walking around and...

...this is all you see.

You don't gotta write anything down.

You're living in a poem.

One time Bobby and I were in church together.

He was 13, 14.

He went to early mass with me

because Elaine was sick.

Boy, it was hotter than hell that day.

Shoulder to shoulder in the pews.

Bobby didn't like going to early mass.

Wanted to watch Abbott and Costello,

go at 11:
00 with Elaine.

During the sermon...

Now, remember, I was your age.

Bobby lays his head down on my shoulder.

I let it sit there for about three seconds...

...then I shoved my shoulder up, much to say:

"Okay. Sit up straight. Now."

Maybe he was tired. I don't know.

He wasn't tired. He was a kid.

He was with his dad. He loved his dad.

He laid his head down on his dad's shoulder

the same way he would his mom's.

In my head I told myself, "This is good for him."

"Too old to be putting his...

"...head on my shoulder."

But...

...that wasn't it.

I was embarrassed.

Everybody can see us.

My son's doing something embarrassing.

I was embarrassed,

didn't know what to do, shoved him.

That's the first thing I thought of...

...when he told me and Elaine he was gay.

He had been for four years, and...

...he'd hid it from us, afraid to tell us.

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