Starsky & Hutch Page #6

Synopsis: Set in the 1970s in a metropolis called "Bay City," this is the tale of two police detective partners, Ken "Hutch" Hutchinson, and Dave Starsky, who always seem to get the toughest cases from their boss, Captain Dobey, rely on omniscient street informer Huggy Bear and race to the scene of the crimes in their souped-up 1974 Ford Torino hot rod, telling the story of their first big case (as a prequel to the TV show), which involved a former college campus drug dealer who went on to become a white collar criminal.
Genre: Comedy, Crime
Director(s): Todd Phillips
Production: Warner Bros. Pictures
  3 wins & 10 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.1
Metacritic:
55
Rotten Tomatoes:
63%
PG-13
Year:
2004
101 min
$87,100,000
Website
907 Views


- You okay?

Look at this! This is horrible!

What kind of world do we live in

where somebody does this?

Well, I think he was aiming at us.

Think this is funny?

Seriously, is this funny?

Zebra 3, we have an ID on that plate.

Lee M. Chau, 1325 Western.

- I repeat...

- Ready to dish out a little payback?

Freeze! Bay City P.D.!

- The hell was that?

- I think it's his kid.

All right, just sit tight, little boy.

Well, well, well, this looks familiar.

Possession of cocaine and

attempted murder, huh?

- Jesus!

- What was that?

That ain't a kid! It's a tiny little man!

And he's got knives! Goddamn!

- My arm!

- Oh, sh*t!

Make him stop! Make him stop!

Tell him to stop! Stop it!

Starsky! Starsky, we need to go now!

Come on!

Wait a minute!

Wait a minute!

All right, now...

Okay, time out. Let's just take a little break.

I'm gonna get out of here... Jeez!

Oh, mama! What is your problem?

I said, time out!

Hutch! A little help.

He pinned you good, partner.

On three. One, two...

Time to answer some questions,

old man.

Who's the little dwarf you got

throwing knives at me and my partner?

That was no dwarf. That was my son.

Liar!

Come on, you're going downtown.

Let's go, Starsky. On your feet!

Now, you wanna tell me

who hired you?

We have a saying in Koreatown.

It goes, "Kiss my yellow ass, copper!"

All right. You wanna play games?

I got a game for you, Chau.

Let's play a little Russian roulette.

We got a little saying here in Bay City:

"You cross the line...

...your nuts are mine. "

There's really a bullet in the gun.

- Yes, I know. That is the point...

- No, you don't understand.

- Let's play!

- The bullet went inside!

Come on, you wanna play,

let's play! Let's play!

- Your turn!

- No!

I thought you wanted to play. Come on,

Chau. You wanna play? Let's play a game!

- What are you doing? Jesus.

- Our little friend here is about to talk.

What in the holy...?

- All right, enough with the talking. Let's go.

- What? No! Starsky, no!

- You're crazy!

- Are you out of your mind?

Calm down.

Calm down? He tried to kill me. He shoot

everything. I have heart attack already.

It's over. It's over.

Just calm down.

- What?

- No, nothing. Nothing. This guy is funny.

- It's not about you.

- That's great. He can be your new partner.

Chau and Hutch. Sounds cool.

Forget it. All right, Chau, what else can

you tell me about the guys that hired you?

Not much. A couple of whiteys.

Nice suit. Perry Ellis.

They pay, I do job.

- What did they look like?

- I don't know.

They were white.

All you guys look alike to me.

That's funny, all you guys

look alike to us. Orientals.

So where'd you meet him?

We met... How do you say? By water.

- At the beach?

- No, no, no. On water.

- Right, a boat. You met on a boat.

- No, no, no. Not a boat.

It's a yacht.

Rock into womanhood, Elizabeth!

We know that you will.

- All right.

- What's that mean?

We have a special delivery for

the little lady. It's right over here.

Let's see what's inside.

- These pantomimes suck.

- Don't look at me. I didn't hire them.

- Well, who did?

- I don't know.

These pantomimes aren't very good.

This must be Reese's big surprise.

Look at me, guys,

I'm a mime too.

- Everyone's miming something.

- Embarrassing.

- Reese just left.

- I know.

- Stay here, I'll follow him.

- I'll follow him.

No, you stay. Keep them occupied.

You're doing great. They love you.

I might do the glass wall

one more time.

Boo!

Terrific. Tell him you like him, ask him to

sit by you at the cafeteria. How do I know?

What am I, your counselor? Yeah, I'd like

to get to the information that I need, okay?

It's done.

My buddy delivered the package. It's in

your garage. It's locked up nice and tight...

- ... in case anybody gets nosy.

- No one saw him?

Not a soul.

Now, about my fee...

You'll be paid as soon as I've

checked it out. If you'll excuse me...

- Reese, wait.

- What?

- Mazel tov, man.

- Thanks.

They grow up so fast.

- Go play dragon. I gotta go.

- All right. Big kisses.

Thank you, everybody, for coming out to

celebrate my little girl's bat mitzvah.

I should say "young woman. "

Lt'll take me a while to get used to that.

- This guy's good. Sweet.

- It's in his garage.

- What?

- The cocaine is in his garage.

- Are you sure?

- We take him down now.

- Let's go.

- All right, cut the music.

Cut the music.

I think I speak for everyone

when I say we're a little mimed out.

Don't worry. Show's over.

You're under arrest for possession

with intent to sell.

- This man's a drug dealer.

- Okay, I think what we have...

- Maybe you didn't hear us.

- Take it easy, everybody.

You're making the biggest mistake

of your life, hear me?

You're the one making

the mistake, pusher.

Kevin, call my attorney,

please. Ridiculous.

- Open it.

- My hands are tied.

Fine. Allow me.

Let this be a lesson to everyone,

especially you kids.

Don't be fooled by the first-class suit

and the big house.

Reese Feldman's nothing more than

a two-bit drug dealer.

You want some proof?

Here's some proof.

This is a bad man.

And this is what bad men do.

A pony!

Happy bat mitzvah, baby. I love you.

Take the kids in, come on.

Let's go, kids.

It's all right, baby, it's okay. Come here.

Come here. We'll get you a new pony.

Hey there, little fella. You okay?

Mr. Feldman, on behalf of the

entire Bay City Police Department...

...I sincerely apologize.

- That's okay, captain.

My attorney here would love to

take them down, but I know...

...that in the bottom

of their hearts...

...these two detectives were just

trying to protect me and my family.

I gotcha. Thank you.

I respect your attitude,

but you can be sure...

...it will never happen again,

because as of now...

...both of you are suspended indefinitely.

Look, cap, this was my fault.

Don't drag Hutch into this. I shot the pony.

You care what happens to Hutch?

You filed for transfer two weeks ago,

citing his behavior as a reason.

- Captain...

- Oh yeah, yeah. Check this out.

Sounds like you're quite

the crime fighter, Hutch.

- You filed for a transfer?

- Guns and badges, right here, on my desk.

Your mother would be

very disappointed in you.

Man, I've really had it with that Doby.

I mean, it's enough already.

"Cavorting with nefarious characters.

Conduct unbecoming of an officer. "

I wrote that two weeks ago.

Things are really cool with us now.

- Hey, did you go through my locker?

- No.

- You went through my locker.

- I might have looked inside...

If you got a problem with someone, tell it

to their face. You come to them as a man.

You don't go behind their back and write

a thesis and try to get transferred.

Backstabber!

Yeah, don't anybody work

with David Starsky.

He'll stab you in the back.

You've got to let this go.

We got lucky. These guys screwed up.

- They can't even touch us now. It is over.

- I don't care.

No one dresses as a mime and embarrasses

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John O'Brien

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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