Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot Page #3

Synopsis: A tough police sergeant's mother comes to visit him, and promptly starts trying to fix up his life, much to his embarrassment. For his birthday she buys him a machine gun out of the back of a van, and begins to further interfere with his job and love life, eventually helping him with a case he's on.
Genre: Action, Comedy, Family
Director(s): Roger Spottiswoode
Production: MCA Universal Home Video
  3 wins & 1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
4.1
Rotten Tomatoes:
8%
PG-13
Year:
1992
87 min
1,035 Views


Mom, I like my life!

You call this a life?

Goodnight, Mom.

Back off, back off!

I'm going in.

- He has an automatic.

Joe, are you crazy?

Mom, what are you doing here?

Mommy's got to change you.

I don't want to be changed.

I've got to change you.

- I can change you.

Stop trying to change me!

Joey, are you alright?

- I'm fine.

Sounded like you were having

a bad dream. - No, I'm fine, really.

I should tuck you in.

- Dont, Mom.

Let me tuck you in.

- I don't wanna be tucked in.

Joey, let me tuck you in.

You just snuggle down.

- I don't wanna snuggle.

You were just having a bad dream.

Remember when you were little

and I used to sing to you.

Oh, God!

- Aw, shush.

See if we can remember how that goes.

- Mom, please don't.

Lullaby and goodnight,

thy mother's delight.

With down overspread,

here's baby's wee bed.

Lullaby and goodnight,

lay thee down now and rest.

Lullaby and goodnight,

may thy slumber be best.

Goodnight, Joey.

Morning, Mom.

Better get going or we'll be late.

- I didn't want to wake you.

Better get you to the station

for your 9:
30 appointment with Ross.

I'm not saying anything.

- I won't argue.

If he arrests you for withholding

evidence, that's your problem.

Suppose you don't want your present?

Present?

- Just a little something...

A present?

You don't deserve it.

- Come on, Mom. Please.

I love presents.

It's heavy.

Jesus!

Is it the wrong kind? - Wrong kind?

It's illegal. Where did you get it?

From those guys who got shot.

A machine gun off the back of a van?

In the store

they said I had to "cool off."

Why didn't you tell me?

I wanted it to be a surprise.

It is!

You're saying it was a big car?

Dont know

if I'd call it big exactly.

So it was a small car.

Difficult to say. To me it was big.

To you it might have been small.

Like a Cadillac?

- Which model?

Any model!

A few years ago...

there was a small one.

- Was it like the Cimarron?

No.

Definitely not like the Cimarron.

Let's take a break.

You're tired.

Are you eating right?

I could bring you

some lentil soup. - Be right back.

So far, so good, Pixie.

Gwen, do you have a minute?

- Sure.

Jesus! That's a full automatic.

- I know.

And your mother... Okay, Joe.

I'll trace the gun. - Thanks.

No telling what she'll come home with.

- I know.

I really appreciate it.

If you don't mind?

Try not to kill anyone with it.

- She's too little. Wouldn't hit her.

Who's the little boy by the pool?

- Joey, only 9 and all those muscles!

You can already see

he's going to have nice equipment.

Dont be embarrassed.

I'm old, but I'm still a woman.

Tell me, do you love my Joey?

I don't know.

I did love him. Maybe I still do.

He loves you.

- He never shows it.

That's Joey.

Doesnt mean he doesn't love you.

If he'd just show me how he feels!

A box of candy,

a bunch of flowers...

He never sent you flowers?

- Never. - Oh, Joe...

And me being a lieutenant

just makes things worse.

Did you see this one?

Very serious looking.

How old is he there?

just after his father died.

I went to pieces,

no good for anything for days.

Joey did everything.

He arranged the funeral,

called the family...

picked out the casket...

talked to the priest...

But he never cried.

I know Joe loved his father.

But to this day

I don't know if he ever cried.

You were talking about something.

- It was nothing.

You were both crying!

- Girl talk. You wouldn't understand.

You have a gift for starting trouble.

Dont interfere with Gwen and me.

- Well, somebody has to.

She's a lovely girl,

and you never send her flowers.

I'll get the door.

Mom, this is the point of no return!

I've had it.

I've completely had it.

I'm taking you to the apartment,

I'm going to handcuff you to a sink,

and put you on the first plane home.

Here you are. Let's go.

Ask me what I saw!

- I don't want to know.

Ask me.

- No!

Ask me what I saw.

You're an old lady from Newark.

You knit, make jam,

talk on the phone. That's it!

What did you see?

The man who sold me the gun.

The one that got away. And his van.

Really? Was he little? Big?

Big, 6' 3", 320 lbs.

He had a tattoo of a coiled snake

with "God Rides a Harley" above it.

Will you remember this?

A Chevy van, gun-metal gray, an '82.

The year with the longer wheelbase.

License plate:

JL2-661.

This is 90W2,

give me 90W90.

Go ahead, 90W2.

Could you find Tony and tell him

I need another favor. - 10-4.

Where's your boyfriend and the guns?

- What are you talking about?

I hardly know the guy.

Paulie, nothing down there.

Check the garage. - I did,

there's nothing. - Well, check there.

Is this the house?

- That's where the van's registered.

Shall I cover the back?

- We're not partners!

Okay, okay.

We're not connecting here, honey.

Keep her quiet!

Wrong house?

Help me! Help me!

Come on.

Oh gosh, no!

Okay?

- Yeah.

Joey, are you alright?

Dont jump!

Get in, sweetie!

We're gonna nail those turkeys!

Okay, Ma. Make a right!

- Okay. - That's good.

Sorry.

- It was an accident.

Jump!

Use the road!

Watch it!

Way to go, Mom!

Floor it!

They're going left.

- Slow down.

Left! Slow it down!

Be careful!

There's nothing in there.

I already looked.

What's in the file?

It's the trace on the gun, isn't it?

What does it say, Joe?

- I haven't read it.

I'm giving it to Ross.

I don't believe this.

- Believe it!

Look who it is.

Norman Bates and his mom!

Cut it out!

- You're going to tell him?

My mother lied.

She got the license plate

and I traced the address.

Sh*t!

- Watch your mouth.

That's rich coming from the most

pathetic cop ever in this precinct.

Is there anything else...

I should know?

- Yes, Detective.

We think you're an a**hole.

Take a walk with me.

Think I'm going to take that?

She's just an old lady.

A monster, that's what she is.

And her cookies suck!

Watch what you say!

- I'm not watching anything!

If you even look at this case...

I'll throw your mom in a county can

before you can say "Golden Ager"!

- Are you threatening my mother?

You, your mom...

Your whole goddamn family.

Ross, you just made

a big mistake. - Oh, sure.

What are you doing?

Jesus Christ!

Hi.

- Hi.

You forgot to dry your hands.

- Ross needs the towels more than me.

Ross needs the towels?

- Long story. - Oh, excuse me.

I have your toothbrush.

- My toothbrush?

Yeah.

With the frog's head.

I forgot to pack it.

Thanks.

Lieutenant!

I want to file a complaint

against him and his mom...

for assault

and withholding information.

What, Ross?

Nothing, just flushing him out.

I'm gonna see you suspended.

Ross! - What?

- Get back to your desk.

Oh, Lieutenant...

- Now! Please.

It's a man thing.

I'd better get back to my desk too.

Oh, Gwen. Thanks for the brush.

The gun was part of a shipment...

that wound up downtown.

The warehouse burnt down and

the watchman was killed in the fire.

Big explosion of ammunition.

Guns destroyed,

cause of the fire never established.

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Blake Snyder

Blake Snyder (October 3, 1957 – August 4, 2009) was an American screenwriter, consultant, author and educator based in Los Angeles who, through his Save The Cat trilogy of books on screenwriting and story structures, became one of the most popular writing mentors in the film industry. Snyder led international seminars and workshops for writers in various disciplines, as well as consultation sessions for some of Hollywood's largest studios. Snyder died unexpectedly August 4, 2009, of what was characterized as either a pulmonary embolism or cardiac arrest, with a public memorial being held at the Writers Guild of America, West on September 29, 2009. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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