Sugar and Spice Page #10

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KANSAS:

Stop, you're gonna make me cry.

DIANE:

And if the O.J. trial taught us

anything, it taught us that in America,

you can cut off someone's head and still

be found innocent if you have enough

money. Your mom only shot a guy...

Kansas smiles at the thought.

DIANE (CONT'D)

Now Cleo, I know you dream of an all

leather apartment with Conan - I heard

the school shrink telling a lunch lady.

Cleo blushes and smiles guiltily at the thought.

DIANE (CONT'D)

And Hannah, you could give your share to

your church - or maybe buy one of those

hungry little kids Sally Struthers

advertises.

HANNAH:

Or, I could get my own horse...

DIANE:

Or that! Look, you guys, I just want to

provide a future for my baby. I know my

bank branch like the back of my puffy

little hand. I could open that safe in

my sleep!

KANSAS:

I'm in.

Squad reacts with SHOCK - did she just say that?

KANSAS (CONT'D)

I mean it. I'm in. This is the closest

thing to a goddamn family that I've ever

had. If one of us needs something, we

all do.

LUCY:

Stop it! This is crazy!

CLEO:

I'm in, too.

LUCY:

Cleo!

CLEO:

Kansas is right. We're like sisters --

we're closer than sisters. And you

don't turn your back on family.

DIANE:

C'mon, Luce, people do it in the movies

all the time.

LUCY:

And they get caught!

DIANE:

That's right. So all we have to do is

watch a bunch of movies and learn from

their mistakes.

CLEO:

And you know real cops aren't half as

smart as Keanu.

LUCY:

Forget it. I've got a scholarship to

Harvard hanging over my head. I won't

risk it.

CLEO:

(sotto, to Kansas)

Conan went to Harvard.

KANSAS:

(sotto)

Shut up.

DIANE:

Lucy, do you know for sure you're going

to get that scholarship?

LUCY:

No.

DIANE:

If you don't - can you still afford to

go to Harvard?

LUCY:

... I don't know. Probably not.

DIANE:

So then this isn't crazy. It's a sure

bet.

LUCY:

Well...

Squad AD-LIBS their encouragement.

LUCY (CONT'D)

I guess we're in this together.

They jump around, thrilled.

LUCY (CONT'D)

But, we have to make a smart plan!

DIANE:

Of course - of course! Hands in...

Squad puts their hands in.

DIANE (CONT'D)

We all have to cross-our-hearts-hope-to

die-stick-a-dirty-needle-in-my-eye that

we'll never tell Jack. We all know he

can't lie - that's why he's going to be

such a great senator.

MUSIC UP:

as the squad goes through their "Cheerleaders Kick Ass!"

routine.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. CLEO'S BEDROOM - DAY

It looks just like Diane's basement. Cleo sits on the couch,

eating from a bag of microwave popcorn. The VIDEO BOX for

"Reservoir Dogs" plays in the tiny picture-in-picture.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. LUCY'S BEDROOM - DAY

The room is neatly ordered. Lucy sits at her computer - DVD

case of "Heat" sits beside her monitor. She's taking copious

notes. Her mom enters with milk and cookies. Lucy stands,

concealing her monitor. Her mom sets down the cookies and

kisses Lucy's good-night before she exits. Relieved, Lucy

sits at her computer again.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. HANNAH'S LIVING ROOM - DAY

It's a sparse room, filled with religious icons. Hannah

nervously places a video into the VCR above the TV, then sits

on the couch. She smiles about to push PLAY on the remote

when her stern, UBER-CHRISTIAN PARENTS ENTER and take a seat

on either side of her. Her look turns to fear as her father

takes the remote and hits PLAY.

END MUSIC.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. LINCOLN HIGH - ESTABLISHING SHOT - DAY

INT. LINCOLN HIGH - HALLWAY LOCKERS - CONTINUOUS

CAMERA TRACKS down the hallway, passing groups of kids as

they talk beside their lockers. We pass the GEEKY GUY (from

"Candidate Speeches") and his two friends.

GEEKY GUY:

... I feel utterly abandoned in a place

that values physical prowess over mental

acuity. I can't wait for all this to

change once we get in the real world...

CONTINUE TRACKING PAST LISA and the B-squad.

LISA:

... I do! I totally marry Prince

William even if he was gay. I mean, in

England all guys are kinda gay anyway.

Even cigarettes are fags over there...

B-squad AD-LIBS AGREEMENT as we CONTINUE to the A-squad

around Diane's locker.

CLEO:

...He slices off the guy's ear, and I

mean you see everything - the bloody

pink hole where the --

DIANE:

Cleo, I've already thrown up twice today

- could you please get to any relevant

part of the movie?

CLEO:

(vamping)

Well...uh...they, y'know, uh... They had

nicknames.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. LINCOLN HIGH - LUNCHROOM - DAY

Squad sits at their lunch table in this large, open room.

Only Diane eats - from all the trays. Lucy walks around the

table, handing out stapled packets.

LUCY:

...Page one is a plot summary of "Heat."

Two has my character summaries. Three

is my overall critique and on four

through ten, you'll find my Nexus search

of all prior analysis of this film...

All stare at her. She stops - starts to pick up the packets.

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