Telling the Story of Us Page #6

---

"Wow," unquote.

I think that says it all.

First, you put olive oil...

...garlic and tofu.

Saut until garlic turn light brown.

Make sure that your wok have

a strong heat underneath it.

Now take an egg and crack it

to the hot oil.

Make sure all the ingredients

are cooked thoroughly.

You okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Now we add some Pad Thai noodle.

I saw Deirdre up at Parents' Weekend,

but I didn't see you.

I went up the weekend before.

You know, since the divorce...

...it's a lot easier for everyone

if we come up at separate times.

Kevin and I took a great hike

up to that waterfall.

You and Ben take that hike?

Yeah, it was beautiful.

Spice it up with some chili pepper.

You know, spicy food

make a better lover.

The hotter you eat,

the hotter you get.

Well, the spicier the better for me.

Rice vinegar.

Does Ben like Thai food?

You and Ben been to Tommy Tang's?

Ben and I are di--

Separated.

Gee, I had no idea.

We're not really telling people.

I understand.

I'm so sorry. How long?

...depending on when

you start counting.

I'm really sorry.

I know how hard it can be.

This will sound crazy...

...but I always enjoyed

Erin and Josh's appointments...

...because it gave me a chance

to get to know you.

But when you called me

about your bite...

...I felt myself looking forward to it

because I knew we'd be alone.

And just tell me if it's too soon...

...but I wondered if maybe you

wanted to have dinner sometime?

We are having dinner.

I was thinking of something

that didn't involve a teacher.

You always hear people say...

...they stayed too long

in a bad marriage.

For the longest time, I never thought

of my marriage as being bad.

I thought love was something you

were allowed to fall in and out of.

You know, peaks and valleys.

But after a while...

...the peaks get lower

and further apart.

Then one day you find yourself

wondering, "Is this who I really am?

Someone who has taken up permanent

residence in the valley?

Or is this just who I am

with this person?"

And then, you ask yourself:

"Maybe there is another version

of my life, of myself...

...that's a happier one. "

Bullshit.

"Yossel looked into Minnie's eyes

and felt...

...nothing.

For two years they'd been apart.

And now, as she stepped off the boat...

...he realized he was

looking into the eyes...

...of a stranger.

A girl he no longer knew.

He had become an American.

And she was still the poor...

...unaffectionate...

...daughter...

...of a blind Lithuanian

violin maker."

It's fear. It was all about fear.

Fear's what kept them together.

This whole time I've idealized

my grandparents' marriage.

But this was not the love of the ages.

The two stayed together

because they were terrified.

Fear of loneliness, fear of failure,

fear of the unknown.

Sure, fear. That's the main

motivator for everything.

That and guilt are the two emotions

that keep a society humming.

You and Rachel stay together

because of fear?

-In a word, yes.

-You're okay with that?

In three words, yes and no.

See, it's not that simple.

You're looking for clear-cut answers.

In reality, there's nothing clear-cut.

Life is not clear-cut.

Life is gray.

For instance:

What do you see right here?

-What are you asking me?

-I'm asking you, what do you see?

I see your ass.

That's what you think you see.

But in reality, there is no ass.

What the f--?

What are you telling me?

There is no ass, just the fatty part

at the top of each leg...

...that is butted up

against each other.

Hence the word "butt."

See, essentially...

...what we're dealing with here is

just a continuation of the leg.

Okay, all right, now you lost me.

It's all illusions.

There is no such thing as an ass.

Just like there's no such thing as

the perfect marriage, job or child.

The whole notion of staying together

and living happily ever after...

...all illusions.

You're saying you don't believe

in everlasting love?

You're seeing the ass again

and not the tops of the legs.

Love is just lust in disguise.

And lust fades.

So you damn well better be

with someone who can stand you.

Katie and I have moved way past

being able to stand each other.

We've moved right

into the hatred part.

I wouldn't worry about it.

Hate fades.

Hate fades?

That's what you're gonna send me out

into the world with?

"Hate fades. Love is lust.

There is no ass."

What a disappointment

you've turned out to be.

Just promise me one thing.

Please promise me that you will not

say any of this to Rachel.

Are you crazy?

This conversation ends here.

When Stan called me,

I couldn't believe it.

I knew it was rough for you guys--

We didn't wanna say until we knew

we weren't getting back together.

Oh, my God.

How are you doing?

I don't know.

I thought I'd be devastated.

Maybe it just hasn't hit me.

-You're having an affair.

-What are you talking about?

You're only not devastated

if you're seeing someone else.

I'm not seeing someone else.

Are you serious about

who you're not seeing?

I don't know.

I know he's nothing like Ben.

He's responsible, plans ahead,

has a Swiss Army knife.

He even wants to cook me dinner.

-He's a sandbag.

-A what?

He's just a sandbag

against the storm...

...holding off the inevitable

devastation.

Rachel, you okay?

Honey?

I'm sorry.

I know I'm supposed to be the one

holding your hand...

...but I just feel terrible.

I mean, the thought of you guys

not being together....

You're our best friends.

Fourth of Julys and Thanksgivings

and Christmases.

You guys were our

Fred and Ethel Mertz.

We thought you guys were

our Fred and Ethel Mertz.

Really?

I never thought this was

going to happen to me and Ben.

I thought we were going to be the ones

to go the distance.

But I just couldn't seem to get him

to put down that purple crayon.

But that's Ben.

That's who you fell in love with.

Katie, you are at 80

who you are at 8.

People don't change!

People change over time.

You've got to expect that.

The only way a relationship works is

if people grow and change together.

Mr. and Mrs. Cogen, Mr. Jordan.

Nice to have you tonight. Is Mrs.

Jordan not joining us this evening?

No, she's not. Stan, I told you

to make the reservation for three!

-I forgot.

-How could you forget that?

Say it louder. The guy

in the lot didn't hear you.

It wasn't that loud.

Did you see Sunday's 7 down?

-I missed that one.

-Five-letter word.

"Wants, requirements."

Rhymes with weeds.

"Needs"?

Exactly.

It was a direct attack on me.

Come on. You're being silly.

It was just a clue

in a crossword puzzle.

I know my wife.

She was specifically attacking me.

And for what?

For having needs.

Like having needs is

some terrible thing.

Show me one person

that doesn't have needs.

Try this bread dipped in

the olive oil. It's delicious.

Stan, give Ben the bread!

Why must you yell?

-Who yelled?

-You.

That's not a yell.

He hears everything as a yell.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes