Ten Inch Hero Page #4

Over and out. Back to base camp.

Roger that. Over and out.

Huh...Hi!

Who was that?

Uh...Priestly.

Jason?

No, huh...he works here.

You've seen him.

Oh, yeah...the freak!

- Check out this dude's dress!

- Nice!

What?

Nice breadsticks, dude!

What, these?

Dude, are you having a not so fresh day?

Think it's funny that I'm buying tampons?

Do you gentlemen...and I use that term loosely...

understand what this means?

Obviously not.

This mean that...

...that there's a woman with whom I'm so intimate

that we're both comfortable with me buying her most personal possessions.

This means that our relationship is so solid, so trusting,

that I'm not embarassed doing this at all.

It means, my friends,

that instead of hanging out at a grocery store havins a sausage fest with another guy

playing the skin flute, or just goin' a lil'...all day long...

I'm getting laid by a beautiful lady

everyday, and she takes it downtown.

And...everyone here knows it.

- No high fives dude. Just gimme some love.

- All right!

Excellent!

Peace!

That's how she knows that I'm home

...and that she's been kissed.

Oh, I hate comin' home this late...

Yes, she tried to wait up for you, but...

- ...eyelids went out.

- Yeah.

So there's a ton of lasagna in the oven.

I only know how to cook for a football team, and...

Julia have only eaten a small piece, so...the rest is up to you.

You didn't eat?

No.

Was your cooking that bad?

Should I...order out?

My cooking is just fine, thank you very much.

I just...feel a little awkward.

Well, I think you should join me.

I don't...want you to feel awkward, but...I haven't eaten.

Okay.

Honestly, this is the best homecooked meal I've had

since we moved here.

- So where are you from?

- Pennsylvania.

Really?

I'm from Maryland.

Really?

We used to go to Maryland all the time, we lived just across the border.

We'd go down to this great lil' crab shop.

"We"?

So there's a Mrs. Miller?

There used to be...

..there's not anymore.

And you ended up with Julia?

That's...unusual, isn't it?

Look...I'm not really comfortable talking about this, Anna.

I'm sorry.

You know, I think I'm gonna go.

- Anna, look, don't go...I...

- No.

I intruded.

Anna, please!

I really need to go.

Thank you.

Come on, Priestly, it can't be that bad.

- Yes, it can.

- I can't believe you won't tell us.

Leave it, baby.

Morning!

Hey, Truck, you'll know.

What's Priestly's first name?

Beats me.

Hey, but it's...gotta be on his application, right?

Now that I think about it, I'm not sure he even filled one out.

Beach City Grill, subs by the inch.

Hi, is Anna there?

Anna?

Anna! Yeah! Yeah, Anna is here.

Hallo?

Hey, it's me.

Hi.

Listen, I was just calling to make sure you're still babysitting tomorrow.

Sure I am.

Good, I...I was afraid you wouldn't come because of last night.

It's just...

- ...everything with Julia's mother...

- Hey, you know what?

I shouldn't have pried.

You know, until Julia was 2 I just, you know...

Well, I should say it wasn't a really good time.

I understand.

Okay, great. So that's all behind us...okay?

- Okay.

- Okay, I'll...

- ...see you tomorrow then.

- Yeah.

Bless you!

Thank you.

Bye.

Okay, I've got it all worked up.

We drive up saturday, check-in at the camp ground...

...and Trucker said that if we full the seat down,

there's enough room for all the three of us to sleep.

Yeah, right...

Like you're gonna be spending the night with us...

What?

Nothing.

- No way!

- What?!

You're still a virgin...

So? It's not anything to be ashamed of...is it?

No, it's not.

If I had mantained that, I wouldn't be in the mess I'm in now.

Yeah...listen, it's, huh, it's not really different from when you do it yourself.

It just...takes a lot longer.

Never?

Guys, I'm a computer nerd, daughter of a southern baptist minister from Wichita.

I'm the worst kind of late bloomer.

You've never plugged your own banjo...

Come on! It's not like you guys do it all the time, right?

Yesterday morning.

Two days ago.

Last night.

Don't worry! I made Bam-Bam go in the other room.

Oh...and I'm the one worried about carpal tunnel?

- Yeah.

- It's not carpal. It's one or two fingers.

Nothing's happening!

Keep going!

I don't know you guys, maybe mine's a dud!

KEEP GOING!

- Ow!

- What ?

Very intense...

- Well, just slow it down a little bit!

- Or move it to the left!

This is one of those times I wish I smoked...

...or did origami, or something...

Come on!

Tadd's waiting for me!

Tell him to come up here and help, if he's so impatient..-

So, is Brad going rollerblading with your guys too?

Tadd says he's not one of those guys who gives up his friends when he gets a girlfriend.

It's cool...I guess.

I guess...but they're roommates.

I mean, they see each other all the time anyway.

Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh...oh, my God...

Ladies and gentleman, we have leafed off!

Elvis has left the building!

Doesn't she look different to you?

Our little girl's growing up.

Roll off!

Baby, you are something!

Something good, I hope.

Yeah...somethin' good.

Hey, I got these tickets for "The Catalyst" on saturday.

Oh...bummer! I'm going out of town.

Where are you going?

Morro Bay, but just for saturday night.

Can't you get out of it?

- Hm-Hm, I'm going with Jen and Piper.

- Who?

My friends from the shop...Jen's mystery man, remember?

Yeah, right...look, can't you just tell 'em you got a better offer?

But I didn't.

Huh...well, f*** you very much!

I'm sorry, but there's no way I'm standing Jen up.

Next time just ask first.

Whatever...

So we have to find someone else to use the third ticket.

"We"'?

As in "Brad"?

Yeah, as in "Brad".

Right, good. Is Brad coming on all of our dates?

What is the f***ing big deal?

You have your friends, I have mine.

True, but I don't bring mine everywhere I go.

You're not one of those possessive chicks, are you?

The kind that doesn't want me to have a life away from her?

- No.

- Good!

Because I'm not gonna put up with that sh*t.

Just...forget I said anything, okay?

I don't know why, I'm being weird.

Hey, call in sick...

Spend the day with me.

Girl's gotta work. Besides, I don't have a rich daddy.

Know, we could have a little fun...

Why not? Tonight.

Daddy!

Hey, kiddo!

- Well, you'll never guess what happened.

- What?

All the power went out at the school, so they sent everybody home.

Now, ain't that a shame?

- I'd tell you're really broken up about it.

- Yeah.

So I figured, if you feel like, we'd go down to the boardwalk one last time

before they close the rides down for the winter...

Awesome!

And you know what?

If we're lucky, we might just be able to get Anna to come with us.

Anna, please!

Daddy won't take me on any spinning rides!

That's because daddy doesn't do spinning rides,

because spinning rides remind daddy

of how he used to feel after frat parties.

Just...dizzy and sick.

Daddy doesn't do 'em, you cant' make me do 'em, it's not gonna happen.

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