The Big Gay Musical Page #6

? you'd steal my heart. ?

[ APPLAUSE ]

[ CLUB MUSlC ]

I didn 't realize you

were working here.

I'm not having a good day.

You wanna talk?

Yeah.

Let's go downstairs.

What's wrong?

I told my parents.

Did you tell them everything?

Yeah.

It didn't go well.

What did they say?

Nothing.

They always say they love me

and they said nothing.

I think my mom started crying.

I could almost hear their

disappointment,

hear their hearts break.

They hate me.

They don't hate you.

It's tough for parents to hear their

kids are gay. It just takes time.

I can't imagine being anything

worse than gay.

Don't say that.

It's all going to be OK, you'll see.

No, it's not Paul.

You always say everything's

going to be OK, but it's not.

Sometimes its going to be horrible.

Sometimes things turn

out to be disasters.

You don't know what it's like to

have you parents hate you.

You don't know what it's like to

disappoint the people who raised you,

and gave you everything.

You don't know!

I just wish there was a cure.

Something I could take

to make me normal.

Some pill. Some shot.

You are normal Eddie. Why would

you wanna change who you are?

You know what, you should

go see that show,

"Adam and Steve - Just the

Way God Made 'Em."

It might help you out.

Yeah, I hear the guy playing

Adam is a slut.

I hear the guy who plays Steve

just popped his cherry.

Paul...

Don't you ever just wanna fit in?

No, I never try to fit in.

Could you imagine if I tried to be

like the people I grew up around?

I'd be watching professional wrestling

and drinking beer out of a can.

Acan, Eddie!

For a date I'd buy a nice box of wine,

drive to a parking lot to

grab some girl's titties.

I don't mind being different.

I like it.

Because I know I'm better!

This is me.

Take it or leave it.

How is being a slut going for you?

Not too well.

I even hired a hustler.

Really?

Was it good?

We cuddled.

You hired a hustler and you

just cuddled with him?

And you thought bottoming

for a bottom was pathetic.

I know, Eddie.

I'm just trying to figure

out who I am.

And sometimes, when

everyone around you

tells you you're supposed

to be something else,

you start to think you are.

So you don't think you

really wanna be a slut?

I just wanna be loved.

Do you think my parents still love me?

What do you think?

You always make me feel better.

It is gonna be OK.

? The day I metyou,?

? I could hearthe overture start ?

? like a musical theatre love story ?

? where a lover gives his heart. ?

? I have never been in love. ?

? This has got to be our gift

from God above. ?

? I won 't change foryou. ?

? I won't become somebody else. ?

? I am now the man

I'm supposed to be. ?

? I won 't change foryou. ?

? I won't change foryou my God. ?

? I just want to know

you love me as I am. ?

? This is our musical

theatre love story. ?

? We're making it scene to scene. ?

? Our love is strong and growing ?

? on ourjourney to be free. ?

Hey Paul, can I ask

you something?

Hey Paul, can I ask

you something?

Of course.

I have a sore throat.

Take a cough drop.

No, I read online that it can be one

of the first signs of HlV and...

also my glands are swollen, and...

If you're scared you should

go get tested. It's free.

Do you think I might be?

After just once? I mean, wouldn't

it be like a sign from...

From what? God?

Look, HlV is a disease.

It has nothing to do with

God or punishment.

If God wanted us dead, he'd send down

the fires of Sodom and Gomorrah.

Just go get tested.

Would you go with me?

Of course. But you're

gonna owe me a drink.

And next time wrap it up.

God you're so stupid.

Alright everybody, we have

a very special treat tonight.

We're about to pop somebody's

cherry everybody.

We have a 'Mostly Sondheim' virgin!

Come on up Charles!

Well, umm...

I'd like to dedicate this song to a

special guy I keep bumping into.

I don't really know how

to talk to him so...

I thought I would try talking to

him in his language - music.

So I wrote this for him.

? I have never believed

in fate before, ?

? but I'm seeingyou most everyday. ?

? You've been haunting my mind, ?

? since I saw you in the light, ?

? and you took my breath away. ?

? There are forces at work ?

? that we don 't understand, ?

? but they're bringing us closer ?

? as if it were planned. ?

? If someone up there

wants us to be together, ?

? then who are we to disagree? ?

? If someone wiser knows

we'd be good together, ?

? it's not our place to ask why, ?

? and I think we should

give it a try. ?

? If providence deems

we fall in love, ?

? then there's nothing we can do. ?

? And I cannot deny what

I'm feeling deep inside, ?

? and I think you feel it too. ?

? So it's hopeless to fight. ?

? There's no place to retreat. ?

? So give into your heart

for surrender is sweet. ?

Look, I should let you know that I'm

really not looking to hook

up or anything.

Me neither.

I just came out to my parents

and it didn't go very well so...

the last thing on my mind is sex.

I can't even imagine telling

my parents I'm gay.

I'm Mormon.

Is that worse than being

a Southern Baptist?

? And I think we should

give it a try. ?

? I think we should give it a try. ?

How'd it go?

Good.

I'm fine, but they want me to come

back in a few months to do it again.

OK.

Oh, I can't leave yet.

They want to take me back and give

me a counseling session in a few.

Teach me about safe sex.

No problem.

I can wait.

Thank you so much for coming with me.

I'm glad you're OK.

So...

I met a cute boy last night.

Oh, me too!

Mine sang me a song.

Mine's a Mormon.

I think we're both pretty

damn pathetic.

I think I like being pathetic.

Eddie, you wanna come back now?

David?

I can't believe we're doing this.

We said we were going to be here.

We can't miss the biggest

opening night of his life.

Even if the whole show

just seems so wrong?

I am just as troubled by all of this

as you are, but he's still our son.

Hey everyone.

Now remember Patty has a new

song at the end of the show.

I can't believe they're adding

a new song opening night.

They don't call it 'off-Broadway'

for nothing.

Ladies and gentlemen,

welcome to opening night

of "Adam and Steve - Just

the Way God Made'Em!"

Before we begin, we must inform you

that the coalition of Christians

has rated our show "FLAMlNG."

This doesn't mean we condone or

encourage the homosexual lifestyle.

It just means that if

you enjoy our show,

You'll end up burning in

Hell right next to us!

God? If you're listening,

we need some help!

I'm frightened Adam, I'm frightened!

We're lost in the woods and we don't

know where we're supposed to be going.

Hello!

Are you a good witch or a bad witch?

Why, I'm not a witch at all.

I'm your guardian angel,

Dorothy.

An angel? Did God send you

here to bring us to Hell?

No Dear. He sent me here to

bring you to New York City.

New York City is God's favorite city,

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