The Egg and I Page #5

If you don't believe it,

just wait and see.

If you don't mind, I'll wait in the house

where I'll be safe.

Timber!

No! No! No!

Bob? Bob!

Bob, where are you?

Where are you, Bob?

Oh!

Timber!

Very funny.

Is that you, Bob? Dinner's ready.

Be there in a minute.

Oh, Bob.

I hope I'm not late.

Happy Tuesday.

- Oh, thanks to you and many of them.

- I like your gown.

- Have I seen it before?

- Yes, I wear it at all my weddings.

- Where would you like to dine?

- Wherever you say.

There's the Palace Hotel in San Francisco.

Wonderful food.

Or Antoine's in New Orleans

if you like bouillabaisse.

- Or we might hop over to New York and try "21."

- Yes, let's try "21."

All right. Oh, Mac,

you have a table for us?

This one right here?

This is our table here.

Wonderful-looking food,

and a wonderful-looking chef.

- An excellent dinner. My compliments.

- Thank you.

- Shall we go dancing?

- I wouldn't mind.

- The Stork Club's just around the corner.

- That sounds fine.

- I'll have the orchestra play something special.

- All right.

Oh, darling, thanks

for a wonderful evening.

- You the folks that live here?

- Why, yes.

Well, I'm Henty,

Great Western Markets.

Henty? Oh, Mr Henty.

It's Mr Henty.

- How do you do, Mr Henty?

- Knocked on the front door, nobody answered.

So I come around by the back way.

Interrupting something, am I?

No, my wife and I were just,

uh... Oh, this is my wife.

How do you do, Mr Henty?

We were just celebrating...

- our anniversar...

- Birthday...

- I see. Maybe I better make it another time.

- Oh, don't go.

- We're all through, aren't we, Bob?

- Of course, we are.

Come and sit down.

We're certainly glad to see you.

- Sit down there.

- Well, just for a minute.

- Would you, uh, care for a cigar, Mr Henty?

- Never touch 'em.

- Bob, perhaps Mr Henty would like a drink.

- Of course.

- Don't touch that either.

- Oh, well...

we just keep it

around in case.

- Some people do, you know?

- So I've heard tell.

Oh, isn't this nice, your dropping in

on us like this, Mr Henty.

- We've heard so much about you.

- We certainly have.

I was over to Miss Putnam's.

Wonderful lady.

- Yes, wonderful.

- She's my dearest friend.

- She told me you people might have some eggs to sell.

- That's right, we have.

Thought I'd drop 'round on

the way home, look things over.

Mighty glad you did.

We're not up to full production yet...

- but be glad to show you the layers we have.

- Won't be necessary.

I judge my eggs by the people

that produce 'em.

"Like chicken, like master,"

I always say.

When I was a little girl...

I got seven medals for perfect attendance

at Sunday school.

- Didn't I, Bob?

- Yes!

Yes, she did. That's the...

main reason I married her.

I was an Eagle Scout myself.

- Well...

- You're not going to leave us so soon.

- It's early. You just got here.

- Don't believe in folks staying up too late.

- "Early to bed, early to rise... "

- "Makes a man...

healthy, wealthy

and wise. "

- How right you are.

- Where's my hat?

It's right over there...

Sport! I'll get it.

Sport, get off.

Very friendly dog.

He likes to sit on hats.

Here, I'll fix it.

Never mind,

I'll do it.

How many dozen eggs do you think

you'll be needing per week?

- Any idea?

- I don't know.

Got to think it over.

Goodnight.

- Goodnight, Mr Henty.

- Goodnight, Mr Henty. Come again.

- Well, that's the end of Mr Henty.

- Yeah.

- Gonna have to eat

an awful lot of omelets.

Oh, why did he have to show up tonight?

Oh, well.

Hey, I just remembered.

I never did carry you over the threshold.

That's right, you didn't.

Oh, just a minute.

Now.

Send up another batch of them nails,

and I figure we'll be all set.

- Okay, drop 'er down.

- There she goes.

Say, is Ma home?

- I've got business with her.

- That's where I left her.

- All right, take it away.

- Up she goes.

Betty, how do you like it?

All set up and ready to go.

You'll have water in the kitchen any

minute now. All we have to do is fill it up.

- Think it'll work?

- Oh, sure. Pa's an expert on water tanks.

He may not know about anything else,

but he knows about water tanks.

He says.

Hello!

- Bob, I need your help.

- What's the matter?

Just about everything. My generator

broke down and everything is stopped.

The cows haven't been milked. The chickens

can't be fed. My dairy products are ruined.

My foreman hasn't the slightest idea

what to do about it.

- I can leave here for a while. I'll come over.

- Would you?

Why don't you get Tom Kettle?

He's a genius with machinery.

I couldn't possibly trust him.

He's such a boy. This is a man's job.

I see what you mean.

Uh-huh.

- Be back for lunch.

- Goodbye.

Bye.

Hello!

Come right on in!

Don't stand on no ceremony.

- Come on in!

- I came to bring you something. It's a present.

- For me?

- Yep.

- Jiminy whizz!

- I made it myself. Do you like it?

Drat my hide and call me a possum.

Ain't this somethin'?

I thought you might like to wear it

at the dance tonight, so I rushed it.

- You might have to do over a couple of the seams.

- I ain't never been so surprised.

First new dress I've had

since way back before the war.

- Stylish too, ain't it? - You'll

be the best-dressed girl at the ball.

- Can't imagine why you went to all this trouble for me.

- It's no trouble, it's fun.

- Get some of them cookies and I'll pour some coffee.

- All right.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Pay it no mind. Just leave it.

Might as well be one place as another.

Come on, get away.

When I was first married, I was

as neat as the next woman.

Tried to keep my house

and kids clean.

But Pa's an awful

old lazy so-and-so.

It was fight, fight, fight all the time,

so finally give it up.

I can't make Pa change and be neat,

so I'll have to change and be dirty.

Been peace in this house ever since.

There, ain't this pretty?

- It's perfectly beautiful.

- Made one every year since I was married.

Got 'em in the closet

in the spare room.

Figured it'd be something real nice

to leave the kids when I die.

Why don't you enter it

in the county fair?

- Oh, you should! It's a wonderful idea.

- What in tarnation fer?

You might win first prize.

You could give the money to Tom.

- He could enter college. Wouldn't that be grand?

- 'Tain't no use.

Birdie Hicks will win.

She wrangles things around every year...

so one of her relations gets on

the committee that judges them.

- You could try.

- I've got a better idea.

- When it's finished, I'm givin' it to you.

- Oh, no, I couldn't.

Oh, I got a whole parcel of'em laid away.

There ain't nobody I'd rather see have it.

- Oh!

- Take another one of them cookies, why don't ya?

Plenty where they come from.

I'll get you some to take home.

They're wonderful.

How do you make 'em?

Just a drop of this

and a drop of that.

- Mix it together

and shove it in the oven.

- You home already? 'Tain't near feeding time.

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