The Family Man Page #5

ANNIE (CONT’D)

Rise...and...shine...!

KATE:

(stirring)

You’re jumping,

sweetheart...

Jack looks at this activity like a man at his own

funeral.

ANNIE:

Mom, don’t you think we

need to open the

presents?

KATE:

(groggy)

Mommy needs five more

minutes in la la land.

That could be her

present...

Josh crawls directly up to Jack’s stomach, climbing

on.

ANNIE:

C’mon, Dad. Get up!

She said “Dad.”

That’s it. Jack moves the baby gingerly over, then

gets out of bed, stumbling over a baseball bat lying

next to it.

He picks up the bat...the same Willie Mays autograph

bat that was encased in glass in his N.Y. apartment.

Frightened, Jack drops the bad, looking down at himself

for the first time...he’s naked...

...a mortified look on his face as he sees the kids on

the bed...

...he quickly grabs a pair of sweat pants and a yellow

cardigan off the chair and throws them on...

Kate, still half asleep, reaches out her hand.

KATE:

Jack...?

Jack turns by instinct. Kate grabs him, drawing him

near. A look of fear on his face as Kate opens her

eyes...

Eye contact...Jack’s certain he’s about to hear her

scream...

KATE (CONT’D)

(still groggy)

Strong coffee, okay?

She lets him go as Jack backs out the door...

25INT. CAMPBELL HOUSE LIVING ROOM - SECONDS LATER

A garishly decorated Christmas tree sits in the middle

of this messy and disorganized living room, a bevy of

gifts underneath and four red stockings over the

fireplace.

Jack darts to the top of the steps...

KATE (O.S.)

(calling from

the bedroom)

Use an entire can if you

have to!

He looks back at the bedroom, then at the

stairs...quickly heading down the CREAKY steps, still

in shock.

He grabs an overcoat from a hook by the front

door...about to step out when he looks down and

realizes...

...he’s barefoot. He glances at a pair of rubber over-

boots sitting by the door, slips them on, just about to

leave when...

He hears the sound of a KEY TURNING in the door

lock...Jack looks at the door, not quite sure what to

do...

The door opens...into the house, arms laden with

wrapped gifts, walk BIG ED and LORRAINE REYNOLDS (both

60s), Kate’s parents. Big Ed’s wearing a ten gallon

hat and a suede overcoat. Lorraine has a cigarette

dangling from her mouth.

JACK:

(drawing on a

memory)

Ed? Lorraine?

Big Ed hugs Jack as best he can with an armful of

gifts.

BIG ED:

Jack you ol’ bird dog.

Merry Christmas to ya’...

Lorraine plants a big fat kiss on Jack’s cheek.

LORRAINE:

Talk to him, Jack.

Please. One day a year

away from the Ponderosa.

I don’t think that’s too

much to ask.

BIG ED:

I heard that. This is

who I am, woman!

(a wink to Jack)

Tell her, Jack! You’re

the only one who gets me,

for god’s sake!

Jack, still holding the door open, plotting his escape.

LORRAINE:

I need some egg nog...

BIG ED:

‘Course you do. Hell,

it’s almost 8 a.m.

(shouting upstairs)

Where are my two l’il

pardners? Annie! Josh!

Giddy up, Bid Ed’s here!

JACK:

Excuse me.

Jack dashes out the door.

LORRAINE:

Where are you going,

Jack?

(to Big Ed)

Where’s he going?

BIG ED:

Damned if I know...

They start to remove their coats, when...

The door flies back open...

JACK:

Where’s my car?! Where’s

my Ferrari!?

BIG ED:

What the hell are you

talking about?

(to Lorraine)

What’s he talking about?

JACK:

Look, can I just borrow

your car?! I promise

it’ll be returned!

BIG ED:

The Caddy? Why don’t you

take your own damn car!

LORRAINE:

Oh just let him borrow

your precious Cadillac,

for god’s sake.

Jack spots a set of keys hanging on a hook.

BIG ED:

He’s got a perfectly good

mini-van sitting out

there in the driveway!

Jack grabs the keys off the hook...darts back outside...

26EXT. CAMPBELL HOUSE - CONTINUOUS

Jack emerges from this charming, suburban two-story

house, some tasteful Christmas lights decorating a tree

in the center of the snow-covered lawn...

He races to a blue Dodge mini-van sitting in the

driveway, a “My Ferrari Is In The Shop” sticker on the

rear bumper. He climbs into the mini-van and peels out

of the driveway...

27INT. MINI-VAN - SECONDS LATER

Jack sees a sign, “George Washington Bridge - 3 miles”...

28INT. MINI-VAN - MINUTES LATER

Jack driving over the bridge. A sigh of relief as he

passes under a sign for “Manhattan.”

29EXT. MANHATTAN STREET - EARLY MORNING

The mini-van pulls up near Jack’s apartment building.

Jack, still wearing pajamas under the coat, leaps out,

running toward the grand entrance where Tony stands

sternly in front.

JACK:

Tony, thank god...

Jack starts to walk past but Tony blocks the way.

TONY THE DOORMAN

Sorry, pal. Entrance is

for residents and guests

only...

JACK:

What are you talking

about? It’s me, Jack

Campbell. Penthouse C.

I put you into commercial

paper!

TONY THE DOORMAN

(not moving)

Uh-huh...

Just then, Mrs. Peterson walks to the door with

her little DOG. Tony opens the door for her...

JACK:

Elizabeth Peterson!

The little dog starts BARKING ferociously at Jack.

MRS. PETERSON

(to Tony re:

Jack, annoyed)

Who is this man?

Tony shrugs his shoulders.

JACK:

You know me, Betty. You

do. Jack Campbell.

We’re on the co-op board

together. We fought side

by side for garbage

disposals. Every morning

we exchange quasi-sexual

witty banter. Think...

She looks at Jack with a raised eyebrow, the dog still

YAPPING.

TONY THE DOORMAN

(to Mrs. Peterson)

Should I call the cops?

I’m gonna call the

cops...

Jack pleads to her with his eyes.

MRS. PETERSON

(raising a hand

to Tony)

No...

JACK:

(a sigh of relief)

Thank you, Betty. I know

if I can just sleep this

off, I’ll be fine...

MRS. PETERSON

And sleep you shall.

Noblesse oblige is not

dead. Not yet

anyway...Come, let’s get

you some help. Surely

there must be a shelter

somewhere in this city.

JACK:

A shelter?! I’m the

richest guy in the

building...I’ve got twice

the square footage you

have!

Mrs. Peterson shakes her head at him, a look of pity on

her face.

Frustrated, Jack turns and runs back to the mini-van...

CUT TO:

30EXT. LASSITER BUILDING - MINUTES LATER

Jack pulls up across the street and gets out of the

van. Running across the empty plaza toward the

building entrance...

31INT. LASSITER BUILDING, LOBBY - CONTINUOUS

Jack bursts through the door, approaching the lobby

desk where FRANK the security guard sits.

Frank spots Jack and blocks his way.

FRANK:

Whoa, whoa, whoa...hold

it right there...

JACK:

Frank. Where’s Alan

Mintz? Is he here yet?

FRANK:

Mr. Mintz?

(a knowing chuckle)

I don’t think

so...building’s closed

pal. You’ll have to come

back tomorrow.

JACK:

Look, I don’t know what’s

going on here but I am

Senior Vice President of

this company.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote