The Ladykillers Page #3

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SORRY YOU'VE BEEN DISTURBED.

POOR DARLING, HE DOES SO

DISLIKE TAKING HIS MEDICINE.

I THINK:

THAT HE'S BEEN SO UPSET...

I'LL LEAVE IT UNTIL TOMORROW.

RIGHT, TOMORROW.

OH, PROFESSOR, AS THE PRACTICE

HAS ALREADY BEEN INTERRUPTED,

ARE YOU QUITE SURE YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ANY

- NO, THANK YOU, MRS. WILBERFORCE.

NO TEA.

THANK YOU ALL THE SAME.

OH, WELL. I'LL MAKE QUITE SURE

YOU'RE NOT DISTURBED AGAIN.

I'M ASHAMED OF YOU.

ASHAMED OF YOU:

CAUSING ALL THIS-

SUCH A DISTURBANCE.

I'M GOING TO SHUT YOU IN.

BUT YOU WERE A GOOD LITTLE GIRL.

NAUGHTY POLLY.

NAUGHTY POLLY.

NERVOUS, LOUIS?

LET'S GET STARTED.

YEAH.

NOW, HARRY.

THE GUN.

RIGHT.

THANK YOU.

HEY, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE

TRYING TO DO? HEY, MOVE ON.

GO ON, GET A MOVE ON.

WE WANT TO GET PAST HERE.

WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?

YOU'RE IN OUR WAY.

GET OUT OF HERE, WILL YOU? OH.

THERE'S NO DRIVER HERE.

NOW, WHAT'S ALL THIS ABOUT?

TAKE THE HAND BRAKE OFF,

WILL YOU?

HEY!

DISTURBANCE AT KING'S CROSS.

THE TRAIN NOW ARRIVING

AT PLATFORM ONE...

IS THE ONE-FIVE

FROM CAMBRIDGE.

- HERE, CHARLIE. TAKE THIS LOT UP TO PARCELS.

- YEAH, ALL RIGHT.

HELLO, M-2.G.W., FROM H.P.C.

URGENT MESSAGE. BEGINS-

CAR BELIEVED CONCERNED IN ARMED ROBBERY, KING'S

CROSS AREA, FOUND ABANDONED IN FIELD STREET.

IT'S THE ONE, HMM? THERE IS

NO TRACE OF STOLEN PROPERTY.

IT'LL DISORGANIZE THE ENTIRE

RUNNING OF THE TRAINS.

WE KNOW, BUT WE'VE GOTTA CHECK

ALL LUGGAGE GOING OUT OF HERE.

YOU CAN'T HOLD UP TRAFFIC

ON A MAINLINE STATION.

WE'RE SURE THE STUFF WAS BROUGHT IN HERE.

THEY'LL TRY AND SHIP IT OUT UNDER OUR NOSES.

WE'VE GOTTA CHECK ALL THE EXITS.

THEY MUST BE INSIDE.

YES, ALL RIGHT.

I'LL PHONE THE YARD.

BUT IN BROAD DAYLIGHT?

I MIND ME OWN BUSINESS.

IF YOU DON'T MIND,

JUST OPEN UP. EXCUSE ME.

SURE. IT BELONGS

TO ME AUNT KATE.

SHE'S JUST AFTER DYING AND

LEAVING ME A FEW OLD KNICKKNACKS.

FAMILY ITEMS.

KEEPSAKES, YOU MIGHT-

EXCUSE ME. COULD YOU TELL ME

WHERE I'D GO TO COLLECT A TRUNK?

JUST OVER THERE, MADAM, WHERE

IT SAYS "PARCELS." THANK YOU.

NOW, HOW MANY PIECES OF LUGGAGE HAVE YOU

BOOKED IN IN THE LAST 10 TO 15 MINUTES?

EXCUSE ME.

JUST A MINUTE, LADY.

YOU MEAN GOING OUT OR COMING IN?

GOING OUT, LEAVING THE STATION!

HOW MANY?

I'LL HAVE TO CHECK.

IT'S A TRUNK. PROFESSOR

MARCUS, WHO LODGES WITH ME,

IS HAVING A TRUNK SENT UP

FROM- WHERE WAS IT?

CAMBRIDGE.

HE'S LEAVING TODAY.

COMING IN FROM CAMBRIDGE

FOR MARCUS. RIGHT.

WILL YOU SIGN FOR IT,

PLEASE, MA'AM?

THERE IT IS, RIGHT-

GOING OUT, HOW MANY?

LET ME LOOK:

AT THE LIST, WILL YOU?

NOW, MAJOR, BEFORE WE START,

LET'S PRESS BUTTON "A," SHALL WE?

IT'S THE POLICE.

THAT'S BETTER.

MAJOR,

I WANT YOU TO KEEP CALM,

SPEAK QUIETLY:

AND CONCENTRATE.

HAVE YOU GOT THAT?

SPLENDID.

MRS. "W" SHOULD BE

COMING INTO VIEW JUST ABOUT-

NOW.

NOW SHE'S DRIVING AWAY.

MAJOR, MAJOR, MAJOR.

RELAX! CALM DOWN!

BACK TO THE STATION.

SHE'S COME BACK TO THE STATION.

WHAT'S WRONG? MAJOR, MAJOR, WHAT'S

HAPPENING? LOUIS, LOUIS, LOUIS.

MAJOR? LOUIS, WILL YOU MIND

YOUR OWN BUSINESS, PLEASE?

LOUIS, LOUIS.

HELLO, MAJOR?

GET OUT.

YOU GET OUT.

MAJOR, TELL ME

WHAT'S HAPPENING.

I'M ALWAYS LEAVING IT.

TELL ME, WHAT'S SHE DOING?

WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

IT'S JUST THAT SHE WENT BACK

TO GET HER UMBRELLA.

SHE COULD'VE SHOCKED US ALL.

THE SILLY OLD-

WHAT YOU KNOCKING HER FOR?

SHE DONE IT, DIDN'T SHE?

WE'RE NEARLY HOME, LOUIS.

WHAT CAN POSSIBLY GO WRONG NOW?

DRIVER, STOP AT ONCE!

DON'T DO THAT AGAIN!

I SAY!

YOUNG MAN, STOP THAT.

YOUNG MAN, DID YOU HEAR ME?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING

TO THAT HORSE?

GET OUT OF HERE.

IS THIS YOUR HORSE?

GO ON, GET OUT OF HERE!

GO ON, GET OUT!

SHOO! GO ON.

GET OUT OF IT.

YOUNG MAN.

DO YOU MIND?

NOW, GO ON, GET OUT OF IT.

GET THIS HORSE:

OUT OF THE WAY THERE.

WHOSE HORSE IS IT?

YOU LEAVE THAT HORSE ALONE!

LOOK, MISSUS, WILL YOU MIND YOUR

OWN BUSINESS? AND DON'T PROD.

GET OUT OF HERE!

THE POOR, DEFENSELESS ANIMAL.

BUT, MISSUS,

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.

HE'S BEEN FOLLOWING ME ALL

THE WAY DOWN FROM BURTON STREET.

HE'S HAD THREE POUNDS

OF MY BEST PIPPINS.

LET'S SEE, THAT'S ONE IN SIX

- HE'S AT IT AGAIN.

GO ON, GET OUT OF HERE.

NO, NOW STOP IT THIS INSTANT OR I

SHALL REPORT YOU TO THE AUTHORITIES.

LOOK, MISSUS, WILL YOU MIND YOUR

OWN BUSINESS? DRIVER, DRIVER.

LOOK, IF YOU LIKE THE HORSE, IF YOU DON' WANT ME TO BREAK ALL FOUR OF ITS LEGS,

GET HIM OUT OF HERE!

DRIVER, I INSIST THAT YOU DO

SOMETHING TO STOP THIS VICIOUS BRUTE.

LISTEN, LADY, THIS IS NO BUSINESS

OF OURS. KEEP OUT OF THIS.

I'M WARNING YOU!

KEEP OUT!

KEEP OUT! NOW GET THE OLD

WITCH OUT OF HERE!

THE POOR, INNOCENT ANIMAL. HE'S

HUNGRY. YOU DON'T FEED HIM ENOUGH.

ARE YOU GOING TO STAND THERE WHILE THIS HOOLIGAN

- LOOK, HE'S AT IT AGAIN!

BOY, GO FOR A CONSTABLE.

NO, LADY, PLEASE.

NOW, LISTEN-

NOW, STEADY ON.

STOP IT, I SAY.

HOW DISGR-

BOGIES, I KNEW IT.

LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.

NO, SLOWLY. DRIVE ROUND

THE CORNER AND COME BACK.

CONSTABLE. THIS RUFFIAN HAS

BEEN BEHAVING DISGRACEFULLY.

WHAT'S ALL THIS ABOUT?

WHAT ABOUT MY BARROW?

- WHERE'S MY HORSE?

- STOP THAT!

WHERE'S MY HORSE?

WHERE'S MY HORSE? ALL

RIGHT, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

HOW DID ALL THIS GET STARTED?

CONSTABLE. I CAN EXPLAIN.

OFFICER, HE STARTED IT. LOOK WHA HE'S DONE TO MY CAB. I STARTED IT?

YOUR CAB?

WHAT ABOUT MY BARROW?

WHAT ABOUT MY WAGON?

AND WHERE'S MY HORSE?

I DON'T BELIEVE IT. I

DON'T BELIEVE IT. SHUT UP!

IT'S JUST SITTING THERE.

LOOK, COULDN'T WE-

NO ONE, I HOPE, IS GOING

TO SUGGEST THAT WE STEAL IT.

QUIET, QUIET!

WHAT'S GOING ON, SERGEANT? THERE'S

BEEN A FIGHT IN THE STREET, SIR.

I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE. MRS.

WILBERFORCE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

THIS LOUT HAS BEEN BEHAVING

- YOU KNOW HER AND YOU LET HER WALK AROUND LOOSE?

NOW, NONE OF THAT! DON' YOU DISTRESS YOURSELF, MA'AM.

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S DONE. BE

QUIET OR I'LL HAVE YOU PUT IN CHARGE.

LOOK WHAT SHE DID-

BE QUIET!

YOU BETTER GO HOME, MA'AM. IF WE

NEED A STATEMENT, WE'LL CALL ON YOU.

WILSON, TAKE THIS LADY HOME.

USE MY CAR.

AND IT'S A BROWN HORSE, 11 YEARS OLD

AND ANSWERS TO THE NAME OF DENNIS.

THIS WAY, PLEASE.

COULD YOU PUT IT THERE?

THAT'S RIGHT. AH.

IT'S SO GOOD OF YOU. I DO

HOPE I HAVEN'T BEEN A BOTHER.

NO, MA'AM.

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

GOOD AFTERNOON.

HARRY, THE POLICE. THEY'RE AT THE

HOUSE. THEY'RE ACTUALLY IN THE HOUSE.

BUT WHERE ARE THE OTHERS?

THE BOGIES BROUGHT IT HOME

FOR HER. WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?

? IN THE TWILIGHT?

? IN THE BEAUTIFUL TWILIGHT?

? THEY ALL GO OUT?

AH, PROFESSOR.

GOOD AFTERNOON, GENTLEMEN.

YOUR LAST REHEARSAL.

AH, PROFESSOR, I MUST GIVE

YOU BACK YOUR TEN SHILLINGS.

THANK YOU. THE CAB MAN

WOULDN'T TAKE ANY MONEY...

BECAUSE HE SAID HE WAS GOING

INTO SOME OTHER BUSINESS.

HOW ABOUT THAT, EH?

HOW ABOUT THAT?

RIGHT. GOT IT?

YOU KNOW, I WAS EVEN HOPING

YOU'D BE ABLE TO PLAY FOR THEM.

OH, YES, BOCCHERINI.

YOU KNOW, IF ONLY YOU COULD HAVE

STAYED JUST A FEW MINUTES LONGER.

THEY WILL BE SO DISAPPOINTED

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