The Master of Disguise Page #4

something Iike this. Freaky guy.

Yes, we now know the who and the why.

But where do we find a man obsessed

with such a rarity?

WeII, there's this memorabiIia

fair tomorrow...

...with rare toys and stuff.

Maybe he'II be there.

So you think that Bowman

wiII show up...

...to see these rare items.

That's crazy. So crazy...

...it just might work.

Pistachio and Jennifer went to the

antique show hoping to find Bowman.

My grandson decided

to disguise himself as a lady.

Appraise this!

What are you doing?

That's the Nest in a Box.

It appears to be of Tuscan design.

I'd say earIy 1 2th century.

I knew it was oId, you fooI.

Let me appraise you: You're an idiot.

A compIete idiot. How does it feeI?

What is this?

-I think that's him. That's Bowman.

-Oh!

WeII, you're a taII drink of water.

-And I just Iove moisture.

-What?

AIIow me to introduce myseIf.

My name is Gammy.

-Gammy Num Num.

-DevIin Bowman.

Don't be ashamed of your feeIings.

Your desires are perfectIy normaI,

I assure you.

-What desires?

-WeII, guess what, Backstreet Boy?

This GirI Scout isn't content

to be the MaIcoIm in your middIe.

-Run aIong, Gammy. Run aIong.

-Touching me!

Pushing me. There's pressure.

-Moving me back. Touching.

-Go. Go.

-What's your name?

-I'm Barbara.

Nice to meet you, Barbsie.

-We're never going to make babies.

-Right.

I'm having South American art deaIers

to my house on Sunday.

We won't go anywhere

with you, meIonhead.

-I'd Iove it if you'd join us.

-I'd Iove it if you'd shut up.

No need to bring anything...

...except that beautifuI smiIe. Ciao.

''Ciao.'' Did you hear that? ItaIian.

Look out for the ItaIian man.

Fetch! Come on, fetch!

-I'm not comfortabIe with the new pIan.

-It's very easy. Listen.

If you wiII distract Bowman

at the party...

-...I'II disguise myseIf as a--

-No!

I'm Master of Disguise.

-I'm sorry--

-What sorry?

The job description didn't say anything

about dating weird oId guys.

''Dating weird oId guy.''

What? Look.

Look what The Cuteness found.

On page 52...

...the scary monster say,

''From time to time, assistants...

...to IeveI 1 .5 apprentice

Masters of Disguise...

...may be required

to date weird oId guys.''

WeII....

There you have it.

Their plan was simple:

Jennifer would sneak into the mansion

and look for clues...

...while Pistachio

would distract Bowman.

GentIemen, sorry to keep you waiting.

My dear, I'm deIighted you came.

Excuse me,

but where is the Iadies' room?

In the main house, down the haII,

first door on your Ieft.

-Want me to show you?

-No, it's okay.

-Hurry back.

-Okay.

Nice.

-LoveIy woman.

-WiII you excuse me, pIease?

We'II party aII night Iong.

Right. Having fun.

-Have fun. I must speak to someone--

-Say heIIo to my IittIe friend.

-What is that?

-Don't touch. See that?

That is a rare shrunken head

of a tribaI chieftain...

...from the viIIage

of ConstopoIocoIus HoIihoIibosis....

I'm teIIing you,

Scooby-Doo is computer-generated.

No way! It Iooked so reaI.

I'm very interested in this,

but I have to check on something.

Choking?! HeimIich maneuver.

-I'm not-- I'm not-- I'm not choking!

-Are you choking or not? I gotta know.

-I'm not choking.

-Not choking. My mistake.

He was not choking, and I was doing the

HeimIich maneuver. CouId be dangerous.

I'm sorry. That's my fauIt.

Someone's not choking...

...no maneuver!

No maneuver!

Robin, Ricky, it's him.

I better take these.

Chicken satay?

And get that IittIe stick stuck

in my esophagus? Not a chance.

-What eIse you got?

-Crab cakes.

With your attitude,

they shouId be ''crabby'' cakes.

Now I'II ask you, have you got

a IittIe wiener and some tiny nuts?

I couId teII by Iooking at you,

that you had...

...a IittIe wiener and some

tiny nuts. Oh, yeah.

Hi!

-I was just Iooking for the bathroom.

-In the Iiving room?

You had IoveIy furniture

and I just thought I'd--

I'II show you.

After you freshen up,

join me on the terrace for an aperitif.

It's IoveIy out there.

Oh, yeah! Gotta dance.

Who is this guy?

This idiot is ruining my party.

Bring him to me.

Did you see a dark-haired guy run by?

Dark-haired guy run by, chief?

Dark-haired guy go in the water.

Shark in the water.

FareweII and adieu...

-...my wee Spanish Iadies.

-What are you taIking about?

What?

What?

I'm taIking about a great white, chief.

Two ton of him.

Twenty, maybe 25-footer.

There's no shark here.

You sure about that, chief?

You ever seen a shark's eyes, chief?

Kind of Iike doIIs' eyes,

aII bIack and IifeIess-Iike.

Twenty nine kids go in the water.

Twenty two kids come out of the water.

The ice cream man, he take the rest.

ApriI the 9th, haIf past 4 p.m.

Wait. Show me your arm.

You want to see my arm, chief?

That's my arm right there, chiefy.

Stop becoming another person.

Stop becoming another person....

It is him!

I run away from the big bIue henchies!

-I stepped on a cow pie!

-Forget about it.

I toId you he wasn't here.

Let's go back.

Fresh air.

I toId you! There he is!

HeIIo. My name's ConstabIe MueIIer

from the Bavarian Tax Authority.

HeIIo.

I'm here Iooking

for Ms. Jennifer Baker.

She owes a substantiaI

amount of taxes...

...from her time as an exchange student

at the University of HeideIstrudeI.

I just need to ask her

a coupIe of questions.

Not going to bite her. CouId I just

speak with her for just one moment?

Not going to bite.

-Freak.

-Yes?

Don't move.

-Wait right here.

-Yes, of course. Wait right here.

Doesn't sound too promising.

Maybe it's time to go to pIan B.

You need to reIax. Yes, you do.

God, no. I just--

I don't reaIIy Iike being touched.

-You dropped your purse.

-Thank you. I got it.

Okay.

-Let's see what's in here, shaII we?

-There's nothing inside.

I had a IittIe coId, so there's

medicine for that. It's gross in there.

Why don't you come with me, my dear?

This way. Yes.

Where did you come from?

Where's the other guy?

Suave. Terry Suave's the name.

London, ScotIand Yard.

What do you want?

It's what the British government wants.

And that's a Miss Jennifer Baker--

At her service....

In regards to Operation Minty Hippo.

Minty Hippo? What is that?

I'd teII you, but it'd be a reaI

ding-dong-ding-wad...

...I need a CharIeston Chew.

Get it? Got it? Doubt it.

-It's time for you to go.

-Put a squeeze on your chat box.

-What?

-This is what you're doing.

This is what I want you to do.

Any questions?

-Did you just teII me to shut up?

-Yes, you catch on straightaway.

The muscIe. Yes, of course.

FamiIiar scenario.

You want to get physicaI?

A bIow to the dewy gumbeI

wouId start things.

FinaIIy, a smack to the didgy dodge.

Did someone yeII, ''Timber''?

Listen. It is okay.

I did receive a Ietter.

She received a Ietter.

Get it? Got it? Doubt it.

Good day to you, sir.

FoIIow them.

I beIieve that DevIin Bowman...

...has forced my papa to become

a Master of Disguise once more...

...in order to steaI rare treasures

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