The Party Page #3

If you want to keep

the women's vote...

you've got to start

with education.

That's where

you spend the most...

Oh, Mrs. Clutterbuck.

Please, can I take

this opportunity...

to apologize to you formally...

for what happened

at the dining room table.

Oh, my dear, just forget it.

It wasn't your fault.

Thank God.

What embarrassment.

Oh, I know.

It was that ridiculous

little chair they put you on.

It was awful,

but at the same time...

I feel that it is my

duty to say this to you.

I just think we should all

forget all about it.

Indeed, you are right...

but before that I would

also go to your husband...

and say to him that I'm sorry.

Oh, that's not necessary.

Really.

It's on my conscience.

Well, if you want to, go ahead.

- Thank you.

- All right.

It's a wonderful story.

General, excellent aroma.

Oh, I'm glad you like it.

I still have a few left over

from the pre-Castro days.

General Clutterbuck.

Sir.

Please, I would like

to formally apologize to you...

for any inconvenience

that I may have caused you...

or your guests

at the dining room table.

It's understandable.

I'm very sorry, and it

will never happen again...

should you wish to have me

on your list of guests...

on some other occasion.

It's all right.

When I saw what havoc

that I wrought...

my poor old knees went to water.

- God, what a state I was in.

- Yes, I can imagine.

But now that I have

apologized to you...

It's all right.

Spoken to your good lady,

and I've told her, sir...

that it is a terrible thing

to have happened...

and I'm sorry.

- Deep down inside.

- Enjoy yourself.

- Thank you.

- Enjoy.

Thank you for listening to me.

It's all right.

General, about this Wac.

I asked her to go out

with me one night.

A Wac?

She was a buck sergeant, too.

We were going down Manila Bay.

Brandy or crme de cocoa, sir?

Oh, beg your pardon.

It's all right.

It is occupied.

Speak Hindustani?

Oh, excuse me, please.

Hey, close the door, man.

Look, I told the General

you were gonna sing.

Well, I'd rather not

do it tonight.

Why not?

The orchestra is gone.

Well, there's a guitar.

You play the guitar?

All right, then you play

the guitar and you sing.

That's all, honey.

Hey, waiter, come over here.

Look, you're gonna be a smash.

Don't worry about a thing.

Come here.

See that guitar?

Go get it.

Get the guitar.

Nothing to lose

If we are wise

We're not expecting

rainbow-colored skies

Not right away

Nothing to lose,

it might be fun

No talk of spending

lifetimes in the sun

Although we may

Both you and I have seen

what time can do

We'll only hurt ourselves

If we build dreams

that don't come true

What can we lose?

We know the score

Let's wait before we talk

Of evermore

One day we may

Nothing to lose,

but much to gain

If love decides to stay

Both you and I have seen

what time can do

We'll only hurt ourselves

If we build dreams

that don't come true

What can we lose?

We know the score

Let's wait before we talk

Of evermore

One day we may

Nothing to lose,

but much to gain

If love decides to stay

Nothing to lose

Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm

Well, how do you like her,

General?

- All right. Very good.

- How do you like her, Bernie?

She's great!

I think she's really great.

Hi.

All right, you win, partner.

I'm telling you, he loved you.

He thought you were terrific.

We talked about it after

you finished the number.

He was very impressed.

He thought you were

beautiful, you know?

So tomorrow will be

just a formality, the test.

We want to see what you

look like on film, that's all.

Trust me.

Will you just trust me?

Here, we can talk.

It's a little quieter in here.

Oh, Charlie,

this is the bedroom.

Oh, this is the bedroom.

Come on,

let's sit over there, baby.

- I wanna tell you something.

- Why don't we go downstairs?

Too much noise downstairs.

Let's just sit on the bed. Sit.

Look, why do you think

I brought you to the party?

Let's sit down. That's it.

That's a good girl.

It's what I brought you

to the party for.

Just one little kiss.

Don't do that.

Let's go. Charlie!

- Give me my gun.

- Thank you, partner.

Where you going?

Attention!

Oh, God.

Just forget it.

Knock it off and hit the sack!

Cookie!

Wait.

Who's in the head?

Help! Somebody!

Help, anybody!

Please, come and help me.

Somebody's in the pool.

Honey, what can I do for you?

- Hurry up, please. It's...

- Oh, hey, little buddy!

American aid, partner.

Great night for a dip.

You know that little fella...

just has a heap of talent

wherever he goes.

He's drowning?

Buddy, you drowning?

Great leapin' pollywogs,

that little gal can swim!

Get him, gal!

Grab him by the wigwam!

I'll wait right here for ya!

Come on, honey,

bring him over here.

Get ahold of him.

Get out of there.

Here we go.

Come on, little buddy.

Bartender, we've been fishin'.

Caught ourselves

a little Injun here.

Oh, God, he's gonna catch

a death of cold.

Oh, no, I don't drink.

Come on. Good, just a little.

There we go.

Right down the old hatch.

There you go, that'll

straighten you right out.

You'll feel better, huh?

- But I don't drink.

- You need a little more.

There you go, huh?

That straighten you out

all right?

How 'bout a little more?

No, I'm perfectly all right now.

All right, good.

Oh, up! Got him.

Looks like little buddy

went bye-bye.

Get ahold of him, Bill.

You got him?

Hang on, here we go!

Poor darling, I'm so sorry.

You stay there and, well,

I don't know what we can do.

But perhaps we can

at least dry it out for you.

Oh, dear, honestly.

Come in!

This tie looks like

a salamander's tongue...

that got stepped on.

Oh, hiya, honey.

Is he all right?

Oh, he's all right.

He's just a little wet.

You got some dry duds

we can put on him?

Oh, surely, yes.

I'll get something of Fred's.

I sure would appreciate that.

Here, darling, put this on him.

Oh, thank you

very much, ma'am.

I love the wet clothes!

Thank you for a marvelous party!

Let's go, buddy.

Fred, darling, I had

to loan him your terry.

He's soaking wet.

This is hers, not his.

Oh, and, darling, do hurry

because the Russians

will be here any minute!

The Russians?

The dancers, darling,

the ballet.

Come on, sidekick.

Now, what's...

Kelso, would you mind?

What are you doing up there?

- I am not doing anything.

- You're wetting the bed.

- I'm not wetting the bed.

- Yes, you are. It's wet.

My clothes are wetting the bed.

I am not wetting the bed.

This is the big chief here.

Oh, big chief speak

with forked tongue.

Try to get his clothes off.

I'll hold him, boss.

You get his pants down.

All right, come here.

Don't do that, no.

Come here, lovely man.

I love you!

I got something dry over here.

Listen, you take off...

Hey, he invited me.

We'll take off your clothes,

and you take off...

Have you got him?

Loosen his belt, Kelso.

I'm trying, sir.

For crying out loud,

let's get 'em off.

Get up off the floor.

I got him!

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