The Rise & Fall of a White Collar Hooligan Page #3

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and you f***ing know that.

So how are you supposed

to get rid of this many cards?

It's just you and f***ing Dr. Spock

as far as I can see.

Mate, it's a big game and we are

a tiny drop in a very large ocean.

Look, mate, when you start with us,

you'll be a runner.

Every team has four runners

and a supervisor.

I'm the supervisor of this team.

Every night you'll take 25 to 30 grand

depending on what the machine

will let you withdraw.

That means I take back 100 to 120 grand

every night for my team of four.

That team of four is multiplied

by another team of four,

so every night

I drop 200 grand to my boss.

- And who's that?

- Don't worry about that for now.

Mate, all you've gotta do

is take 100 cards

and empty a couple of cash machines

every night,

and for that I'm gonna give you

1,000 a night in cash.

What do you say?

It's money for nothing.

Guys, guys, guys. Shut that off.

- This is Mike. Mike's the new guy.

- What happened to McClurg?

He's with another team now, OK?

Mike stepped up because of the vacancy.

Yeah, but I don't know this guy.

They don't this guy either.

So excuse my paranoia here, mate.

Do us a favour, lift your shirt up.

- You're all right. I don't lift shirts.

- I'm not f***ing kidding.

- You need to lift your shirt up.

- Get the f*** off me! You prick.

Hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey.

Back off, Topbeef.

- Lift up your shirt, for f***'s sake.

- What?

He just wants to see

you're not wearing a wire.

- I'm not wearing a f***ing wire!

- Right, so f***ing prove it.

Mike, please.

- You happy now?

- Ecs-f***ing-tatic. Thank you.

Topbeef, get the cards.

Get the cards.

Come on, ladies, we've got work to do.

These cards aren't gonna f***ing do

themselves. Jamie, you're gonna drive.

Dan, stop f***ing doing drugs as well.

I can smell it

in this f***ing apartment.

What are you doing?

What the f*** are you doing?

- What?

- What are you doing? I said let's go.

- I'm rolling.

- Oh, you're rolling. OK.

Well, f***ing...

Come on, for f***'s sake

- All right, all right.

- What are you looking at?

Goon.

Shouldn't we have a lookout?

We're on a main f***ing road here.

You're using a cash machine.

Get on with it. For f***'s sake.

[bleeping]

F***ing hell, it worked!

Don't wave the money around

and don't leave the card in the machine.

Two rules so basic

I failed to mention them

on account of them

being so f***ing obvious.

You also don't dance

down the street singing,

"I've just withdrawn a load of money

from a cloned credit card. "

- Do you understand?

- I'm just excited, that's all.

You're starting to f***ing wind me up,

that's what you're doing.

Listen, you've got 99 cards left to do

and I can't...

- Put the f***ing money away.

- All right, all right, all right.

I've got my own machines to do.

F***ing d*ckhead.

I'll tell you what, though.

I could get f***ing used to this.

[Mike] Like any job, what at first

was exciting soon became routine.

The times and places changed,

but the job was always the same

No small talk.

No "Hi. How's it going?"

Just withdraw as much cash as you can.

I was still worried

about getting pinched for it,

but, like Eddie said, it wasn't like we

were mugging old ladies or nothing.

He'd always had a reputation

for finding a scam somewhere.

At school he found where the dinner

ladies threw away the old meal tickets

and then sold them back

to the other kids at half price.

Now he'd found

a different kind of meal ticket.

This was serious money,

and as time went on,

we became better mates than

we'd ever been back in the old days.

He made sure

he looked after his team as well.

Of course, I was always tempted

to skim a I bit off the top,

but I knew I had a good thing going

and I didn't wanna risk it.

Each of us were rinsing

100 cards a night,

each one paying out

between 250 and 300.

That's 25 to 30 grand.

Even on a slack night, a team of four

was bringing back 100 grand,

not to mention the other team

that Eddie had running about elsewhere.

That's 200 grand

he was giving to his boss,

who was also taking the same amount

from another supervisor.

That's 400 grand.

Oh, and there's two bosses,

meaning whoever was at the top

was raking in 800 grand a night,

less wages and running costs.

I could see why Eddie wanted to check

he could trust me

before letting me in on this.

I was handling more cash

then I'd ever seen in my life

and it felt like a victimless crime.

To be honest,

I felt like Robin f***ing Hood

After years of the banks

f***ing everyone over,

it was our turn to take from them.

The boys were a bit wary

of the new guy at first.

But after I saved them

from getting their collars felt,

I was one of the team and it felt like

we'd been working together for years.

Jamie was all right but a bit slow.

And Dan was far too much of a stoner

for Eddie's liking.

Topbeef seemed to have

a natural dislike for most people,

so was the hardest to win over.

But together we had each other's backs.

After every night's withdrawals, we'd

go out and blow the wages straight away.

Booze and drugs

got us through to the mornings.

At the weekends, if we weren't

kicking the sh*t out of the opposition,

we'd hire Ferraris on credit

against next week's wages.

I never thought a grand a night

could be spent so quickly.

It was one long f***ing party.

I guess the theory was if we kept

drinking, we'd never see the hangover.

- Where have you been?

- Just don't, babe.

- I'm f***ing shattered.

- Yeah, me too.

Who are ya? Who are ya?

- Where'd you get this from?

- Babe, what are you f***ing doing, eh?

- Where did you get it from?

- It's my wages.

- He pays you in cash?

- Yes, he f***ing pays me in cash.

I love you so much.

You've changed since you got that job.

- I'll work for us both.

- I need to be successful.

I have to go.

- You're trying to f***ing leave me.

- You've changed since you got that job.

Doing what I'm doing,

I can give you a better life.

Don't worry, mate.

There'll always be another one.

You'll always get another crack

at the whip.

Yeah.

I just knew what she wanted, you know?

I just understood her.

What the f*** are you talking about?

I'm talking about the score.

1-0. We'll always get another crack

at Millwall.

- You're such a cock.

- Come on, mate. It could be worse.

- Oi, I know you.

- Mate, f*** off, will you?

One of you c*nts threw a f***ing

glass bottle at my mate last week.

We're having

a f***ing conversation here, bruv.

Why don't you do yourself a favour

and f*** off?

Here they come. Oh, great.

We've got Tweedledee, Tweedledum.

Oi. We ain't finished.

[Mike] Eddie was a good mate

as well as a good supervisor.

If you were loyal, he'd look after you.

But you wouldn't wanna get

on his bad side.

- Stealing from banks was no problem.

- Dan.

But once the money was out,

Eddie expected it all to go in the bag.

Come on.

- Are you stealing from me?

- [Mike] Ed, what the f*** you doing?

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