The Somewhat Normal Life Of Li Gin (0.5 Draft) Page #13

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Devin (looking up out his his arms at Dean and getting up and walking towards Dean): Wait a second, I know you!

Dean (gulps and nods): Yeah, I’m--

Devin (putting his hands on Dean’s shoulders): You’re the guy that encouraged me to do this!

Dean (as he pushes Devin’s hands off of him): Encourage?

Devin:
You’re a freaking idiot! Why didn’t you tell me how much of a f***ing shitty idea that was?!

Dean:
I did though.

Devin (laughing like an evil villain): What the f***ing sh*t do you want from me?! A car?! You can buy hundreds of them!

Dean (as Devin goes on his rant): That’s not how money and inflation works you know--

Devin (walking back to his chair to wallow in his misery): Go away, Dean freaking White. You don’t deserve to be in MY PRESENCE!

Dean:
Hey! I understand what you’re going through--

Devin:
No you don’t, It took me years to make this work! AND THEN I MESSED IT UP! I’M RUINED! ALL MY MAGICAL WORK! (randomly/abruptly jumps up in Dean’s face) AND YOU DID NOTHING TO STOP IT YOU JERK!

Dean:
Dave told me what was going on! He’s a cashier, and he ain’t doin’ much better than you.

Devin (sitting down sobbing, wallowing in his randomly happy sounding misery): Yes he is, He actually has sustainable income, He has a wife that actually loves him, doesn’t cheat on him with his boss--

Dean:
I thought you owned the place!

Devin:
I sold it earlier this month, and it seems to be a downward slump coming my way after I sold this junky place! (he randomly gets up) I don’t get what kind of an idiot would buy this place, JUST TO SHUT IT DOWN!

Dean:
I-I-I-I Don’t know how to reply to that, I’m so sorry, Devin.

Devin:
WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME, Dean?! WHY DID YOU FREAKING COME HERE JUST TO MAKE ME WALLOW IN MY MISERY EVEN MORE?!

Devin punches the wall and curses at Dean.

Dean (walking off): I’ll come back later.

Devin curses at Dean as we cut back to Dean sitting down, asleep at his keyboard (it is the old one we saw get broken). Dina walks in (the document is empty and still called Untitled).

Dina:
Dean?

Dean (waking up): What?

Dina:
You okay, honey?

Dean (coughing):
God--! Jesus Christ, I had the weirdest dream.

Dina (she goes to comfort him): Oh, That happens sometimes.

Dean:
Yeah.

We cut to Li being wheeled in an apartment by Sara and Bill. Lin walks in.

Lin:
Li!

Li:
Hey, Lin.

Lin (looking up at Sara and Bill): What happened to him?

Sara:
He’s paralyized from the neck down.

Lin (Looking down at Li and rubbing his head): Oh, You poor baby, I’ll help you.

Li:
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Until Sagely comes.

Bill:
Who?

Lin:
My, friend--

Li:
Her girlfriend!

Bill:
Oh, Lesbian?

Sara:
Bill!

Bill:
What? Is it illegal to ask questions in this galaxy?

Lin:
Wouldn’t you mean Universe?

Bill (walking out of the apartment): I’m done, Sara--

Sara:
Get back here!

Bill (as soon as she says that, he runs back in): I’m not done!

Lin:
What’s up with him?

Li:
He’s always like that.

Sara:
He’s already figured it out! It took our other friends a while to figure out, Bill’s just flat out an a--

Bill (drinking a bottle of club soda): I Heard that!

Lin:
You’re back!

Sara (elbowing Bill): And he’ll never leave.

Bill:
Let’s leave.

Sara (as Bill leaves she grabs Bill’s shoulder, and Bill stops with a look of pain and agony [his face also becomes red] on his face, His arm that is being grabbed goes blood red too): How about no?

Bill (squeaky voice): How about you let go?

Sara (grab becomes stronger): We will talk to Li and Lin. DO I MAKE myself clear, Honey?

Bill (even squeakier voice): Yes honey.

Li (whispering to Lin): They’re always like this.

Lin (whispering back): What a loving couple.

Li:
Ha, Yeah.

Bill:
What’d you say?

Li:
Nothing.

Sara:
Look at me!

Bill (looking at Li and Lin): Is she still yelling at me?

Sara:
COME ON! LOOK AT--

Bill:
Is she?

Lin:
No.

Li:
Yeah, She isn’t looking at you (as she gets louder) We swear!

Bill (leaving):
I’m leaving.

Sara (running towards him): GET BACK HERE YOU LONELY PIECE OF MISERY!

Sara slams the door.

Lin:
Huh, They seem nice.

Li (laughing):
If the meaning of nice is nutjob.

Lin:
You got that right. They are the ones that saved you?

Li:
Yeah.

Lin:
You seem to have some weird people in your life now.

Li:
Oh well. What are ya gonna do?

Lin (walking off): Not be their friends and ignore them.

Li:
Hey! I have to go to the bathroom!

Lin:
Good luck with that.

We cut to Chase, Dave and the rest of them walking in the airport.

Dave:
Lo, They ain’t gonna let you keep those products on the plane.

Lo:
They better.

Sam:
Lo, Throw them away, They’re not allowed in Florida anymore--

Chase:
They’re not?

Sam:
No.

Carrier (ticket cashier): Tickets?

Lo:
Me and Dave got tickets, They’re buying their own.

Carrier:
Ah, And who is Dave?

Dave (running up to them, cheeks red, has a piece of pizza in his mouth): People throw away perfectly good food! Wait, Why is it green?

Carrier (pulls out police bat): That’s a sign that the food was infested with the corono-virus! Get away!

Dave:
What?!

Lo:
Can we use his ticket still?

Carrier (to Lo):
Why certainly-- (to Dave) Go! You’re going to infect them!

Dave:
Ah you’ve got to be kidding me.

Carrier:
Get away! I said get--

Dave (falling to the ground): I don’t feel so good.

Sam:
Now that’s a fall.

Dave burps as Another woman comes up to the ticket register, Sam buys a ticket as we cut to Lo (window seat) and Chase (middle seat) sitting in first class seats.

Lo:
Too bad Sam didn’t have enough for a first class seat.

Chase (getting a vape pen out): Thank god for the corono-virus.

Sam walks up to them.

Sam:
Well, I randomly had enough frequent flyer miles to upgrade to first class even though I’ve never used this airport, So--

Sam sits next to Chase.

Chase:
Dang, Honey, that’s great.

Lo:
She probably accidently left it on my account, I fly a lot with this airport.

Sam:
Oh, Well you’re out 7,000 points.

Lo (gulps):
Jesus Christ I was gonna use that to upgrade to an extra-small drink.

Chase:
Are the drinks’ regularly xx-small?

Lo:
Yeah, But the tickets are really cheap, SO it’s fine.

Sam:
Is it?

Lo:
You don’t talk to me, You just used 90% of my points! I can’t even get a tootsie roll for 1,000 points! I need 1,001 points!

Sam:
Well looks like you’re 1 point short.

Lo (he begins banging his head on the TV): I hate my life.

Sam:
Do you?

Lo:
Yes I do!

Sam:
No you don’t.

Lo:
Yes I do!

Sam:
No you do not.

Chase:
Yes he does.

We cut to Dean writing, but he stops, and begins having a migraine. He jumps up and yells for Dina, but she says that Vic’s awake so she’s cooking her some fish, and Dean says UGH.

Dean:
You’ve got to be kidding me.

We cut to Dean walking in the bathroom, He takes some medicine, and looks at himself in the mirror.

Dean:
You’ve got this. You’re Dean White man! You’ve got this! You’ve got this!

He drops the bottle of tylenol he’s got out. The medicine spills on the ground.

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