The Somewhat Normal Life Of Li Gin (0.5 Draft) Page #6

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Bill:
Are you Angie?

Angie:
Yeah.

Bill:
Your my wife’s aunt aren’t you?

Angie (nodding):
We haven’t met?

Bill:
No I don’t think we have.

Angie (sitting down): Huh.

Bill:
How’s your day going?

Angie:
Normal I suppose.

Bill:
So the usual?

Angie (chuckling): Yeah, The usual.

We cut to Li sitting in a chair in a doctor’s room. Dr. Xavier walks in with a clipboard and a sheet of paper on it.

Xavier:
Well, Li, You’re a basket case.

Li:
What does that mean?

Xavier:
I say that when someone’s health is in the trash, You have the highest blood pressure I’ve seen in my 39 years of being a doctor, You should be dead right now! Deader than dead! You have heart disease, but the good news--

Li:
There’s good news?

Xavier:
You don’t have diabetes.

Li:
But I have heart disease still? How’s--

Xavier (nodding): Yes, Yes, but there’s better news.

Li (grunting):
Better news? Haven’t heard that one before.

Xavier:
You may become unparalyzed.

Li:
What?

Xavier:
You shouldn’t even be paralyzed fully, Your arms still show use, your neck shows heavy movement usage, You can still use your arms and move your head more than you can.

Li:
Look doc, I can move my neck and arms, but only about two centimeters.

Xavier:
Oh, Well, You’re just so miserable aren’t ya?

Li:
I suppose I am.

Xavier:
You suppose?

Li:
Yeah.

Xavier (taking his glasses off): It is a yes or no question, Devin.

Li:
Who’s Devin?

Xavier:
Ugh, Cut! Cut!

Li:
What are you talking about?

The set is put down as Dean walks in and sighs.

Dean:
Come on fools! Get it together!

Xavier (coughing): I don’t feel so good.

Dean:
We gotta get it together! Ugh!

Dean begins banging his head on Li’s chair.

Li:
I could’ve fixed that scene, I swear--

We cut back to Dean rewriting in the director’s chair, Angie’s actress, who’s named Angie, walks up to him.

Angie:
I get more lines, Deanie boi?

Dean:
Don’t call me that, and no, Angie, You got less lines actually.

Angie:
Are you kidding me?

Dean:
No, I’m not.

Angie:
I’m your wife’s sister and this is all you can give me?!

Dean:
What? You think you’re entitled to a more prominent role just because you’re related to my wife?! Who do you think you are?! Dina doesn’t even have a role so you better calm down!

Dean throws the script down and walks out of the chair.

Dean:
I should’ve cast Dina as your character instead.

Angie:
YOU STINK!

We cut to Dean writing, He is muttering what he is typing about, which happens to now be a scene about Chase, Lo, and Sam. A power outage then occurs.

Dean:
GOD--

Dean gets up and checks his watch. He then throws it at the wall, and he then goes to sleep in his bed. We then cut to him dreaming about a farm, He walks in the farmhouse, and a whole bunch of ripped out pages are on the ground as a pitchfork falls right in front of him, causing him to gulp and stumble backwards. He then hears a baby crying.

Dean:
What is this?

He grabs the pitchfork, and begins waving it around like a lightsaber.

Dean:
Why is it so light?

It goes to dust in his hands as a tornado suddenly sucks up the farmhouse.

Dean:
No, No, No--

The tornado slams into the shot, and we cut to an overhead shot of Dean, who is being sucked into the tornado. He is screaming for his life as we cut inside the tornado. It looks like pure beauty before he falls straight down into a Walmart. He falls on the bedding section on a bed.

Dave (walking up to him): You okay there, Dean?

Dean:
My back! My back!

Dave:
Ah it is just a dream man! Just wake the f*** up!

Dean:
Wake up?

Dave:
Yeah, Man!

Dean (getting up and walking off out of the shot): Do y’all have Madden NFl 27 Legacy Pro Royale Edition?

We cut to Dean walking down the video game section, looking at the PC games.

Dean:
God this is a trash PC game selection.

He grabs a random Sims game before Li suddenly appears in front of him.

Li:
Where am I?! Where the f***--?!

Dean:
You are a character from the script my character is writing in a script I’m writing.

Li:
What?

Dean:
Let me explain this to you like a movie synopsis, A struggling writer decides to write a script about himself writing a script that is a sequel to his previous film.

Dean looks straight at the camera as Li looks confused. Li says something that causes Dean to look back at Li.

Li:
Why don’t you just write a sequel instead of meta-sounding trash?

Dean:
Well, You’d get more lines, Do you really want to work some more?

Li:
Oh, No, I don't. How am I standing up anyway? I’m supposed to be paraylzed.

Dean:
This is a dream so you can do whatever you want!

Dean snaps and a horse falls flat onto the TV section in the background, breaking all the TVs in the shot.

Li (looking at TVs): Ah.

Dean:
Yeah.

Li:
Well, Uhhhh, Can you wake up and keep writing my lines?

Dean:
Power’s out, I’m burning up too.

Li:
It is 30 degrees here!

Dean:
It was at 80 degrees in my house before the power outage.

Li:
Oh. Wait, If the power’s out, then why am I here? And if this is a dream, can’t you just make yourself cold?

Dean:
That’s not how writing or dreaming works.

Li:
It isn’t?

Dean:
No.

Li:
I have never ever had a dream, I just realized that.

Dean:
You just realized that?

Li:
I’m an underdeveloped secondary protagonist in a horrible but better than the previous one script! No, How would I realize that?!

Dean:
I dunno.

Li:
You dunno?

Dean:
Yes, I dunno.

Li:
Oh, I dunno either.

Dean:
Me either.

Li (walking out of shot): I’m getting out of this dream.

Dean:
Please god take me with you!

We cut to Dean sleeping in his bed when the power suddenly comes back on, waking Dean up in the process.

Dean:
UGH I LIKED MY SLEEP.

We cut to a shot of him writing and drinking coffee as we then cut back to Li, who is being moved in his wheelchair by Bill. They’re in a Bed Bath & Beyond looking at towels.

Li:
Why is Life the way it is?

Bill:
I dunno.

Li:
You don’t?

Bill:
Should I?

Li:
It would be nice if you did. It seems as if nothing can get better nowadays. I dunno.

Bill:
Well, You dunno either?

Li:
Why are we here again?

Bill:
Sara needed towels.

Li:
So why ain’t she buying em?

Bill:
Because the doctor’s office was across from here and she just texted me that we needed them.

Li:
Great.

Bill:
The Greatest!

Bill grabs a towel set.

Bill:
A semi-sequel to TSNLOBB?

Li:
That was an old towel brand from the 70s.

Bill:
Ah f*** yeah!

Bill throws them in Li’s basket he’s holding.

Li:
How am I holding this again?

Bill:
Oh yeah, How are you doing that?

Li:
I dunno.

Bill:
Dang it. You got me there.

Li:
I dunno, Do I?

Bill:
Okay stop it.

Li:
I dunno how.

Bill throws Li onto the ground.

Li:
OW! YOU--

Bill:
I’m sorry, I dunno how to pick you up.

Li:
AH I HATE YOU!

We cut to Sam, Chase, and Lo in an elevator. They get on the floor they want to be on, and the knock on Sara’s door. Sara answers it.

Sara:
Hello.

Sam:
Is this, Billie Boi Ross Tucker The 3rd’s house?

Sara (nodding):
Yeah.

Lo:
Except it is an apartment--

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