The Suite Life Movie Page #3

There's just one thing.

Anything.

I'll do anything.

Well, because the work Dr.

Olsen is doing is on twins,

You and your brother would need to attend.

Just not that thing.

That is Dr. Olsen's

one requirement.

After reading your paper, he thinks

that you could be the ideal twins.

To participate in his research.

Me and Zack? In a lab?

Hey, it's not like I'm just some idiot.

Who doesn't know anything about science.

Oh, yeah? What's matter?

Nothing.

What's the matter with you?

See? See?

I can't go anywhere with him.

Yeah? Well, I don't wanna

go anywhere with you first!

And when I get there, you're not welcome!

Ouch.

Well, that is a shame.

You know, this internship

could help you qualify.

For a scholarship to Yale.

It would?

Cody, are you really going to let

your anger towards your brother.

Jeopardize your entire future?

Is this your lunch?

Oh, it was.

Cody, next time you throw up,

At least tell me so I can grab my camera.

Oh, I love you, dock.

Oh. Mmm.

You must be the Martin

twins, Zack and Cody.

Oh, hi. I'm Cody.

It's an honor

to meet you, Dr. Olsen.

I know. Come on, I have

so much to show you.

Come on, don't dawdle.

Come on.

Let me help you with that.

Oh, it's really heavy.

Watch out.

Yeah. This way.

I think you're both gonna see that

this is someplace very special.

I'll say.

This facility is fantastic.

This was actually

an abandoned mill complex.

The actual sawmill is on the

other side of the Lake.

We're planning on renovating it.

I have two words for you

that might change your life.

Hot. Tub.

There you go.

My contribution to science.

Now, I must warn you.

My brother's idea of research.

Is discovering how to

simultaneously burp and sneeze.

I can almost do it without

my eyes popping out.

You must be very proud.

Welcome to the most advanced.

Subterranean neuroscientific

laboratory on earth.

Gentlemen, I give you the gemini project.

It kind of just looks

like a giant basement.

So, you don't think it's too much?

Well, it doesn't

really scream "science."

'cause I decorated it myself.

Is that the hydro-isotope

caloubometer,

Capable of reading the

undetectable electrical charges.

In a miniscule brain wave?

Yes. Isn't she beautiful?

Oh, I love her.

Oh. Shh.

Baby, don't speak.

Cody, come, come, this way.

I have to show you this.

This is my mind transference facilitator.

Every apparatus in this

shangri-la of science...

It's astounding.

What's this?

Uh, that's a cappuccino machine.

Dibs on this.

And dibs on these.

Hey, hey, Nellie.

Nellie. I'm Zack.

Remember me?

I crashed that trillion dollar sub.

Kind of a legend in the science world.

Hello, Zack.

This is my sister, kellie.

We sometimes help Dr.

Spaulding with his work as well.

Since the research is so similar.

So, what exactly are you working on?

My colleague,

Dr. Spaulding,

Is developing a substance

that will allow dolphins.

To communicate with humans telepathically.

It's Noble, sure, it's Noble,

But my goal is to use it to perfect

communication between humans.

For what result?

Imagine. If we could connect

with each other's minds,

We'd actually be able to

feel what others feel.

And where there's more empathy between

people, there's less conflict.

So you chose Zack and me.

Because we have conflict?

Exactly! Now, initially

my research was on twins.

Because of your similar DNA,

But it's progressed far beyond that.

If I can resolve the irresolvable conflicts.

Between twins such as yourselves,

I can expand that to all mankind,

And create a world free of fighting,

and anger, and aggression.

Well, that'll make hockey fun.

Perhaps it will be better if I show you.

So, why am I wired up to this thing again?

I need to establish a baseline

for your brain processing speed.

Why even bother?

He's asked that question three times.

Now, Zack, words will flash on the

screen in a series of colors.

Red, green, blue... But the color of the

letters won't correspond to the word.

For example, the word

"blue" is written in red.

Can this thing kill asteroids?

No.

Kind of a waste of money then.

You see what I have to live with?

Zack, your job is to

correctly touch the color.

The word is spelling in the allotted time.

Got it!

Really?

No. No.

No?

Did you get all the brains?

Yeah. Pretty much.

Ow!

Keep in mind that if you

don't respond fast enough,

The machine administers a small shock.

Okay. Wait, what?

Cody, you register reply times.

Mmm-hmm.

This is going to be fun.

So, uh...

Okay.

Huh.

What do I win?

Mom and dad's car?

Ow! Ooh, that hurt.

Concentrate.

Next one's up.

Hey, that's not fair, I was talking.

Yeah, that's usually

where your troubles begin.

Ow. I felt that one

in my toes.

Ow! Ow!

Ow!

Get them right

and there won't be a problem.

How can I... How can I get them

right if they're moving too fast?

Oh, very disappointing results...

Hey, take your revenge now.

As long as this makes us...

Ow! ...Even.

Let's get one thing straight.

We will never be even.

You know, right about now,

Cody and I would be romantically

feasting on edible fungi.

We picked off the organically

fertilized forest floor.

Wow.

You're a cheap date.

But none of that matters now.

Yeah, because Cody made his choice,

And he chose science over chemistry.

Did it ever occur to you that he

might have had a very good reason...

You know what?

Not good enough.

But if you two could just communicate...

You know what, after this moment,

I'm done talking about Cody.

Works for me.

I am in.

Great.

Aw, look at the cute crabs.

Oh, that one looks just

like my Uncle carmine.

He had those same beady red eyes,

And claw-like hands,

and scaly complexion.

Oh.

It's okay, it's okay.

He met a woman who looks

just like a lobster.

Now, they're really happy together.

No. Cody loves crabs.

Especially, that little bib you

get to wear when you eat them.

He calls it his

"crustacean catcher."

You two are a barnyard full of crazy.

Okay, good luck!

Good luck with what?

Fine. Keep your claws on.

I won't tell them.

Tell us what?

About the escape.

Escape? What escape?

If I told you I wouldn't

"not be telling you!" hello!

Sorry, boys.

You're about to be lunch.

We got a runner!

We got a runner!

Sit!

Boo, you, little crabby!

Boo, you!

Help.

Salt?

Thank you.

More water?

Read my mind!

Napkin?

Oh, absolutely!

You guys are all so nice to each other.

Why wouldn't we be?

That's what I was going to say!

Twins should always be nice to each other,

Don't you agree, Ben and sven?

Yeah.

Yeah.

We love being twins.

Don't you?

Well, if by love you mean

a dark bottomless pit.

Of constant burning of a thousand

white hot suns, then yes.

So, you two don't get along?

Sure. We got a long...

List of things that.

We can't stand about each other.

Well, you know, how can I

get along with someone.

Who's constantly ruining my life?

Or someone who is constantly

telling you what's wrong?

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