The Sword in the Stone Page #3

Well, won't you?

Oh. No. You see.

I'm an orphan, and a knight

must be of proper birth.

I only hope I'm worthy

to be Kay's squire.

That's a big job too,

you know.

Oh, indeed, yes, yes.

I would say almost impossible. Yes.

Well, now then. When I said

that I could swim like a fish...

I really meant as a fish.

You mean you can turn

yourself into a fish?

After all, I happen

to be a wizard.

- Could you turn me into a fish?

- Well, do you have any imagination?

Can you imagine yourself

as a fish?

Oh, that's easy.

I've done that lots of times.

Oh. Well, good. Then I think

that my magic can do the rest.

Archimedes, what, what

is that fish formula?

- Who? Who? What? What? What?

- You know, that, that,

that Latin business.

Hmm? Fish? Latin?

Oh, uh.

Aquarius aquaticus aqualitus.

And-And now if you don't mind...

I say good day to the both

of you, if you please.

When he stays out all night...

he's always grumpy

the next morning.

- Then he must stay out every night.

- Yes.

Oh. Oh, yes. Oh, I say,

that's very good, boy. Very.

Who? What? What?

All right, boy. All set.

Here we go.

Aquarius aquaticus

aqualitus quum.

Aqua digi tarium.

Merlin, am I a fish?

Am I a fish?

Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes,

you are a fish...

but if you don't stop that

flippity-flopping around...

and get in the water,

you won't last long.

Now, now, stay right here in the tules

and I'll... I'll be with you in a minute.

Oh.

So you thought you could take

right off like a shot, did you?

Well, I am a fish,

aren't I?

You merely look

like a fish.

That doesn't mean that you can swim like

one. You, you don't have the instinct.

So, you'll have to use your,

your brain for a change.

You are living between

two planes now.

Somewhere between the ceiling

and the floor.

Now, there, there's lots

of ups and downs...

like-like, uh,

like a helicopter.

- Helicopter?

- Yes...

Oh. No, never mind.

Every flick of a fin

creates movement.

So, first we'll start

with a caudal fin.

No, no, boy.

Your tail. Tail.

Now, now, that gives you

the forward thrust now.

Come on. Let's get a rhythm.

Right, left.

Right, left. One, two.

Left and right

Like day and night

That's what makes

the world go 'round

In and out

Thin and stout

That's what makes

the world go 'round

For every up

there is a down

- For every square

- There is a round?

Yes.

For every high

- There is a low?

- Uh-huh.

- And for every to...

- There is a...

- Fro.

- Fro.

Yes, fro.

To and fro, stop and go

That's what makes

the world go 'round

In and out

Thin and stout

- Merlin! Merlin!

- Oh!

- I swallowed a bug!

- Oh. What's wrong with that?

After all, my boy, you are

a fish. L-Instinct, you know.

- But you said I had no instinct.

- Yes, of...

Oh. Oh, I did. Well, th-that's

neither here nor there.

But the main thing

is you must...

Set your sights

upon the heights

Don't be a mediocrity

- Mediocrity?

- That's right.

Don't just wait

and trust to fate

And say that's how

it's meant to be

It's up to you

how far you go

If you don't try

you'll never know

And so, my lad

as I've explained

Nothing ventured

nothing gained

Let's, let's swim through that

tall grass again. It tickles.

Oh. Oh,

I beg your pardon.

Me too.

For every to there is a fro

For every stop

there is a go

And that's what makes

the world go 'round

Oh, let go,

let go, let go!

Oh, you big,

bug-eyed bully, you!

Who, me?

Oh, here, here, here,

here, here, now, boy.

There's no sense in going

around insulting bullfrogs.

A fish has plenty of other

problems without that.

The water world has its

forests and its jungles too.

So it has its tigers and

its wolves. And that, eh, ah...

That's what makes

the world go 'round

You see, my boy

it's nature's way

Upon the weak

the strong ones prey

In human life

it's also true

The strong will try

to conquer you

And that is what

you must expect

Unless you use

your intellect

Brains and brawn

Weak and strong

- Help, Merlin! Help! Help!

- That's what makes the wor...

Jehoshaphat!

Oh!

- Quick, Merlin, the magic!

- No, no.

You're on your own, lad.

Now's your chance to prove my point.

Wha-What point?

He's the brawn and you're the brain.

Oh, now, don't, don't, don't panic!

You use your head.

Outsmart the big brute.

Smart move, lad!

That's using the old intellect.

- Bravo, boy! Great strategy!

- Is the lesson about over?

D-D-Did you get the point?

Yes, yes, brain over brawn.

Okay, lad, I'll fix the big

brute. Higgeldy piggeldy...

No, no. Hocus pocus...

Now, what in blaze... Eh...

Merlin!

Now what? Oh, it's,

it's that, that boy!

- Wh-Wh-What in b-blazes!

- Help! Help! Help!

Ouch!

Help!

Archimedes!

Help!

What in thunder is a monster

like that doing in the moat?

By George, l-l-l... I'll, I'll...

I'll turn him into a minnow.

- Merlin!

- Oh! Oh, there you are, boy.

Snick snack snorum!

How in the world did you ever

get out of that mess?

That, that big fish almost swallowed me

and, and Archimedes, he, he saved me.

Well, by Jo...

Oh, what do you know about that?

I did nothing of the sort!

I intended to eat him.

Young perch is my favourite dish.

You know that!

Oh.

- Do you believe that, Wart?

- Well, l...

Wart. Wart!

I've gotta go. Thank you,

Merlin. It was so much fun.

- And, Archimedes, I, l...

- Pinfeathers, boy!

Wart! Where are you, Wart?

Coming!

I'm coming.

Now, Archimedes.

Why would you half-drown

yourself for a tidbit of fish?

And after such

a big breakfast?

Pinfeathers and gully fluff!

We were doing fine

until we got in deep water.

Then along comes this huge pike

with big jaws and sharp, jagged teeth.

Oh, turn him off, Dad.

He was a monster!

The biggest fish I ever saw.

- And, boy, that's the biggest

fish story I ever heard.

- But it's true, sir.

That's three demerits for being late

and three more for the fish story.

Now, hop into the kitchen!

I told you the Wart

was loony.

Yes, well, he's either

out of his head or, uh...

there's something mighty

fishy going on around here.

For every high

there is a low

For every to

there is a fro

To and fro

Stop and go

That's what makes

the world go 'round

- Oh, it's you, Merlin, sir.

- Uh, yes, my lad.

Now, have you ever

considered being a squirrel?

Well, no, I don't suppose.

Well, now, there is

a tiny creature...

with enormous problems.

How he has survived

throughout the ages...

is one of nature's

big mysteries.

His life is hazardous.

Downright dangerous.

Uh, would you

like to try it?

- Oh, no, I'd better not.

- Oh-ho.

It's, uh, too dangerous

for you, eh?

Oh, no, it's not that.

It's just that I've got six

demerits. All this work to do.

What a mess!

What a medieval muddle.

We'll have to modernize it.

Start an assembly-line system.

All right now. One and a-two

and a-three and a-four!

Higitus figitus migitus mum

Skitun de bitun de batun de dum

- But I'm supposed to do it.

- No one will know the difference, son.

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