The Wheeler Dealers Page #6

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[ WOMAN CRYING ]

OH, NOW,

THERE, THERE, HONEY.

DON'T CRY. NO.

OH, I THOUGH YOU WERE GONE FOREVER.

OH, ME AND MY BOY

STANISLAS,

WE'VE BEEN WILDCATTING

ALL OVER THE PLACE.

WE WENT TO EUROPE

ON TUESDAY.

YOUR B--

W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

MOTHER, YOU'RE TALKING

TO THE HEAD WRANGLER

OF THE HENRY TYROON

COLLECTION.

THIS IS:

MISS CATHY MADISON.

SHE WORKS FOR THE SAME MAGAZINE

YOUR BOY LEONARD WORKS FOR.

ART WORLD?

SUCH A MOVING COLLECTION.

SUCH MARVELOUS TASTE.

THAT -- THAT NOLDE.

YEAH. HOW ABOUT THIS CUTE

LITTLE YELLER ONE RIGHT HERE?

AIN'T THAT A BEAUTY?

ARE THEY REAL?

THEY BETTER BE.

BUT THAT ONE OVER THERE --

THAT'S IN THE TATE GALLERY

IN LONDON.

WELL, IT WAS

IN THE TATE GALLERY.

WE JUST ABOUT GOT THIS

EXPRESSIONIST FIELD

- STAKED OUT, HUH?

- THEY ARE REAL.

MR. TYROON, I HOPE

YOU'LL SHOW THEM ALL TOGETHER

IN YOUR EXHIBITION.

YOUR PERSONAL TASTE

MAKES IT ALL A...

AN ENTITY.

UM, HENRY, HAVE YOU LOOKED

AT ANYTHING YOU'VE BOUGHT?

LOOKED?

MY POOR EYES:

ABOUT BUGGED OUT.

NOW, IF YOU

COULD JUST TELL ME

WHAT YOU CONSIDER THE KEY

TO YOUR COLLECTION,

I'LL HAVE PLENTY

FOR MY INTERVIEW.

YES.

WELL, THE, UH, THE KEY

TO MY COLLECTION IS, UH, THIS.

I IMMERSE MYSELF

IN WHATEVER THE PAINTER

IS TRYING TO COMMUNICATE.

THIS SCHOOL, IF I MAY

CALL IT SUCH IS, UH,

IS NOT DECORATIVE.

IT DEALS WITH...

HUMAN PROBLEMS.

AND... I LEARN FROM IT.

MR. TYROON, THANK YOU.

YOU HAVE DONE:

A BEAUTIFUL THING.

THE ART WORLD OWES YOU

A DEBT OF GRATITUDE.

Stanislas:
LET ME GO DOWN

AND HELP YOU GRAB A CAB.

GOOD DAY, MA'AM.

[ SOBS ]

HENRY, YOU DON' LOVE THEM.

YOU HAVE NO RIGH TO OWN THEM.

WELL, NOW, I AIN'T GONNA

HIDE THEM AWAY.

I'VE JUST GOTTEN INVOLVED IN

A LITTLE WHEELIN' AND DEALIN'.

DOESN'T ANYTHING

GIVE YOU ANY PLEASURE

UNLESS IT MAKES MONEY

FOR YOU?

OH, MOLLY,

YOU GOT ME ALL WRONG.

YOU DON'T GO WHEELIN'

AND DEALIN' FOR MONEY.

YOU DO IT FOR FUN.

MONEY'S JUST THE WAY

YOU KEEP SCORE.

[ DOORBELL RINGS ]

YOU SEE, I FIGURE IF THERE'S

A STRIKE ANYWHERE,

THIS WHOLE FIELD

IS GONNA GO STRAIGHT UP.

NOW, ANYTIME YOU FEEL LIKE

COMMUNICATING WITH THESE FELLAS,

YOU JUST COME RIGHT ON UP,

YOU HEAR?

All:
HOWDY, HENRY.

BOYS.

All:
EVENING, MISS THATCHER.

EVENING, JAY RAY,

R.J., JAY RAY.

WE SURE HATE TO BUST IN.

WE ASK YOUR FORGIVENESS.

WE DIDN'T WANT TO INTERRUPT.

OH, THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

YOU'RE NOT INTERRUPTING A THING.

All:
THANK YOU, MA'AM.

NOW, HENRY, YOU REMEMBER

THE TIME I LET YOU HAVE MY CREW

SO YOU COULD MEE AN EXPIRATION DATE.

I SURE DO, J.R.

AND REMEMBER, HENRY, WHEN WE

DRILLED ALL THEM DUSTERS,

WE DIDN'T WHIMPER.

I DID APPRECIATE THAT.

WELL, THEN, HENRY,

NOW, WE HEAR YOU'RE

ONTO SOMETHING HOT.

WHERE'S THE ACTION, HENRY?

- CANADA?

- VENEZUELA?

WELL, NOW, HOLD ON, BOYS.

YOU CAUGHT ME OUT PREMATURELY.

I'M NOT READY YET.

All:
BUT, HENRY,

WE'RE YOUR BUDDIES HERE.

WELL, SINCE I CAN'T PAY

FOR WHAT I BOUGHT,

I WOULD BE GLAD TO EXTEND

OF A LITTLE PARTICIPATION.

HENRY, WE HEAR TELL

YOU'RE MESSING AROUND

WITH THEM ELECTRONICS.

NO, NO, NO.

OIL.

OH, NO.

HEAVEN FORFEND.

NOT THIS YEAR.

ANYTHING BUT OIL.

OIL IT IS.

AND IT'S RIGHT HERE --

ON CANVAS.

- CANVAS?

- CANVAS?

HENRY, ARE YOU

ALL RIGHT, SON?

YOU FEELING A MIGHT BI PEAKED, SON?

MOLLY, I WONDER IF YOU COULD

GET THESE GENTLEMEN

SOMETHING FOR THEIR

PARCHED THROATS?

All:
WELL, JUST A LITTLE

BRANCH WATER, MA'AM.

BOYS, DID YOU EVER HEAR

OF A FELLA NAMED RENOIR?

OF COURSE YOU HAVE.

ONCE UPON A TIME,

THIS FELLA RENOIR,

HE PAINTED PICTURES.

AND HE COULDN'T SELL THEM

TO SAVE HIS LIFE.

HE GAVE THEM AWAY

FOR HIS SUPPER.

SOLD SOME FOR 50 CENTS.

WHY?

THAT'S 'CAUSE THEY WAS ALL

KIND OF FUZZY.

AND PEOPLE LAUGHED.

PEOPLE WEREN'T READY

FOR FUZZY PICTURES.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT ONE OF THOSE

FUZZY OLD RENOIRS

WILL BRING TODAY?

MNH-MNH.

$1 MILLION.

[ WHISTLES ]

NOW, I KNOW.

YOU'RE GONNA SAY THAT THESE

PICTURES DON'T LOOK FUZZY.

THEY LOOK SCRATCHY.

WELL, I MAY BE WRONG,

BUT WHEN PEOPLE GET READY

FOR SCRATCHY PICTURES,

THESE ARE GONNA GO UP,

RIGHT THROUGH THE CEILING.

LOOK AT THE FUSELAGE

ON THIS WOMAN.

WHAT'S THE ACREAGE

ON THIS RUN, HENRY?

OH, I'D SAY, UH, $60 MILLION

AN ACRE, COUNTING THE FRAMES.

[ EXHALES SHARPLY ]

WHAT'S THE DEPLETION ALLOWANCE?

WELL, I'LL TELL YOU, J.R.,

IT'S NOT DEPLETION,

BUT IT WORKS OUT THE SAME.

YOU BUY THE PAINTINGS,

YOU GIVE THEM TO THE MUSEUM,

AND THEN YOU TAKE A DEDUCTION

ON THE APPRAISED VALUE,

WHICH IS GOING UP.

I FIGURE I CAN SAVE YOU,

OH, SAY, 10 CENTS

ON THE DOLLAR OFF INCOME.

RAY JAY.

JUST A MINUTE.

LOOK, RAY JAY,

YOU THE ART MAN.

- WE COULD BUY A LITTLE...

- THEY LOOK PRETTY GOOD.

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

I'LL GO.

ALL RIGHT.

AHH.

HENRY, WE'VE MADE

A DECISION.

NOW, WE REALIZE THAT A DEAL

LIKE THIS IS RISKY,

BUT THERE'S A RISK

IN ALL GOOD THINGS.

SO WE'RE GONNA TAKE

HALF THE KANDINSKY

AND ONE-FOURTH OF THIS PILE

OVER HERE --

IF WE GET A ONE-EIGHTH OVERRIDE

ON THE PRODUCERS

OF THIS BATCH HERE.

ALL RIGHT.

SOUNDS FAIR.

YOU GOT YOURSELF A DEAL.

YES, SIR, IT'S A DEAL,

J.R., RAY JAY.

All:
EVENING, MISS THATCHER.

EVENING, HENRY.

EVENING BOYS.

[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]

WELL, NOW,

THAT WASN'T HARD, WAS IT?

HENRY, YOU'RE QUITE

AN OPERATOR.

IN SOME FIELDS.

IN OTHERS, I DON'T EVEN KNOW

WHERE TO START.

WELL, YOU COULD STAR WITH UNIVERSAL WIDGET.

ALTHOUGH MAYBE:

THAT'S NOT EXCITING ENOUGH --

NOT ENOUGH ROOM:

FOR WHEELING AND DEALING.

YOU WANT ACTION?

MM-HMM.

OKAY.

FIRST THING IN THE MORNING,

YOU AND I WILL HOP IN A CAR

AND RUN UP TO MASSACHUSETTS

AND TAKE A LOOK:

AT THIS UNIVERSAL WIDGET.

THEN YOU CAN PREPARE

TO HOLD ON TO YOUR HAT.

WHAT HAPPENED TO FEINBERG

AND YOUR TAXI?

WE COULDN'T GET THE TOP DOWN

ON THAT ONE.

[ WHIRRING ]

LEFT IS SCOTCH:

AND RIGHT IS BOURBON.

[ ICE CLINKING ]

LEFT IS SODA,

AND RIGHT IS BRANCH WATER.

ALL I WANTED WAS A LIGHT.

UH, TRY THAT ONE.

[ WHIRRING ]

OH!

OH!

HENRY, THIS IS NOT THE WAY

I LIGHT MY CIGARETTES.

[ BELL TOLLING ]

EXCUSE ME.

COULD YOU TELL US WHERE

THE UNIVERSAL WIDGET PLANT IS?

PLANT IS:

RIGHT DOWN THERE.

BURNED TO THE GROUND

AFTER THE WAR.

SPRING OF '99.

DON'T LET ON ANY MORE

THAN YOU HAVE TO, ZEKE.

IS THAT THE ONLY PLANT?

YOU SURE?

ONLY ONE.

FIRST LEFT,

SECOND RIGHT.

DOWN THE HILL.

OLD NEW ENGLAND COMPANY.

STRATEGICALLY LOCATED.

AND IT SURE HAS:

LOTS OF ROOM FOR GROWTH.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

COME IN.

GOOD AFTERNOON,

MR. WHIPPLE.

MIGHT BE.

MIGHT NOT BE.

MY NAME IS HENRY TYROON.

THIS YOUNG LADY:

IS MISS MOLLY THATCHER

FROM THE WALL STREET FIRM

OF BEAR, OSGOOD, AND WHITBY.

WOMEN ON WALL STREET NOW,

HUH? HMM.

UH, MR. WHIPPLE, WE WON' TAKE UP MUCH OF YOUR TIME.

WE -- WE JUST WANT TO ASK YOU

A FEW QUESTIONS.

MIGHT AS WELL ASK THEM

SITTING DOWN.

UH, MR. WHIPPLE,

WHERE DID YOU BUILD

THE NEW PLAN WHEN THE NORTH ADAMS STREE PLANT BURNED DOWN?

NEVER DID BUILD:

A NEW PLANT.

UM, YOU ARE THE PRESIDEN OF UNIVERSAL WIDGET?

SAYS SO ON THE DOOR, DON'T IT?

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