This Is the End Page #10
Please, God!
Jesus, Jesus!
F***.
Jonah!
Jonah!
Jonah, stop this!
Please! Jonah, where the f*** are you?
Why did you vomit on us!
Bad Jonah! Stop!
Stop eating him!
Watch out!
He's super strong!
Aah!
Sh*t!
What is happen...
Oh, no!
I'm gonna
tittie-f*** you, Seth.
Don't tittie-f*** me!
What are they,
big B's or small C's?
I'm gonna push
your titties together.
Push 'em together!
I'll get you something to help!
I'll pass
you something!
Okay, pass it to me.
Ow! F***! Sh*t!
Aah! Oh!
Seth!
We're getting crazy!
Come on! Come on!
Jesus, open,
God damn you, open!
No, no, no, no.
Jesus...
Oh, f***.
We gotta hide. We gotta hide. I know!
He's coming! He's coming!
I know he's coming!
I don't know
what the f*** to do!
I don't know...
Where are you going?
Sh*t.
Please go away.
He's sniffing.
I'm so scared, James.
Be quiet.
You're breathing really loud. Am I?
Don't breathe through your mouth. Okay.
Now you're doing loud
nose breathing. Am I?
I don't know where else
to breathe from.
Is that...
Seth.
Oh, sh*t.
Don't move.
Oh, sh*t, he's coming
right this way. Oh, sh*t.
Oh, sh*t. Oh, sh*t.
Get out of my way!
Move! Move!
F***!
You okay?
Come on!
Let's go. Let's go.
Okay. Okay. Okay.
What the f***!
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
There's a f***in'
demon chasing us!
A demon?
Demon?
What the f*** happened
to you guys? That!
It's Jonah!
He's possessed!
He's crazy!
Oh, f***!
You brained him.
Is that... I was supposed
to do that, right?
Yeah.
Motherf***er.
- Fasten!
- Hurry!
Fasten,
God damn you, bastard!
He's gonna be f***in'
bad news
when he wakes up!
He's f***in' strong.
My side's good.
Oh, sh*t!
All right,
I'll f***in' hit him.
F***! Come on, come on!
Okay!
This sh*t's
cray cray, guys.
I mean, it's, like,
the real, like Apocalypse.
It's, like,
the Book of Revelations,
like that means
there's a God.
Right?
I haven't led my life as though
there's a God this whole time.
Who f***in' saw that coming?
That there's actually a God?
I'd say 95%
of the planet.
Jesus f***ing Christ, man.
You might want to stay
away from saying that.
"Jesus f***ing Christ"?
Why?
Why can't I say that?
One of the Ten Commandments.
"Thou shall not take the name
of the Lord thy God in vain. "
Jesus isn't the name
of the Lord.
God is name
of the Lord.
Jesus, God,
it's all the same.
It's the Trinity.
Father, Son, Holy Ghost.
It's like Neapolitan
ice cream.
I don't even know what
the f***ing Commandments are.
Guys, I think this is sort of
bullshit, because we're all good people.
I can look at each one of you
in the eye, I know you're good.
I'm good.
We're four actors.
We bring joy
to people's lives.
Yeah, but we don't
do it for free.
We get paid handsomely, much
higher than the average profession.
It's not like it was just
handed to any of us.
We've worked really
hard to be here.
Yeah, pretend like
it's hot when it's cold.
You sitting on the beach,
it's freezing,
you in your drawers, talking about
something, everybody's surfing.
I think God
might have just f***ed up,
made a mistake, and left
us behind by accident.
I mean, He's got a lot
of sh*t on His plate.
It's not an oversight,
it's not a mistake, okay?
We got to face facts. We're here,
and there's a reason we're all here.
Why are you so sure?
I've done things, man. I...
I gouged a man's
eyeballs out.
What the...
F*** off.
Craig.
Well, I was a kid, man.
It was a f***in' bar fight.
It was a bad
foosball game.
He said I didn't call spinneys,
and I f***in' called spinneys.
He got all in my face, and I
smashed a bottle across his face...
...and the first eyeball
was an accident,
but then I was, like, f*** it,
and I went for the second one.
It was f***ed up.
But you know what?
That sh*t happens. I'm saying,
that's... I think that's why I'm here.
I got to admit something.
I, uh...
I f***ed Lindsay Lohan.
She was f***ed up.
She was high.
It was at
the Chateau Marmont,
and she kept banging
on my door.
She kept calling
me Jake Gyllenhaal.
That's f***ed up.
Yeah, I said, "Call me
the Prince of Persia. "
See, that's what
I'm saying, man.
We've all done bad sh*t,
you know?
We've done more bad sh*t
than good in our lives, and
it's time to
pay the piper.
Whoa, sh*t!
Something's wrong.
God did this.
He gave us light,
and then He took it away.
You hear that?
It's the soundtrack
of us going insane.
Damn, I wish there was something
we could do to help him.
I know what we can do.
The f***in' stench.
Jonah Hill?
Jonah?
Jonah Hill.
Jonah Hill is no more.
Demon?
Yes?
F***. That's not good.
That's not good.
Jay, you fool.
I say unto thee,
the power of Christ
compels you!
Oh, does it?
Does it compel me?
The power of Christ
compels you!
Does it, Jay?
The power of Christ
compels you!
Is the power of Christ compelling
me? Is that what's happening?
The power of Christ
compels you!
Guess what?
It's not that compelling.
Jay, you serious
right now?
That's your f***in' plan? You're
gonna repeat lines from The Exorcist?
I would assume they did
their f***in' research.
It's a movie!
It's a manual.
It's a f***in'
training manual.
I say unto thee,
the power of Christ
compels you!
The power of Christ
compels you!
The power of Christ
compels you!
Geez, it hurts
a little bit.
It's, like,
this little sting.
The power of Christ
compels you!
Seriously, f*** off.
The power of Christ
compels you!
Jay?
The power of Christ
compels you!
Holy sh*t!
You're pissing him
off, man. Just stop it!
Jay! The power of Christ compels you!
The power of...
Get the f*** down!
Don't f***ing push
me, a**hole! Geez, man!
Easy!
F*** you!
You're a f***ing
a**hole, you liar!
Still?
Yes. Still? Yes.
Guys, guys, we got
a possessed guy here!
Do we have to argue
about this right now?
Let 'em fight.
We got an exorcism
to finish. Hello?
Do you want to know why
I didn't stay with you?
Yeah.
You f***in' changed.
You're a f***in'
sell-out.
You did f***in' sell out.
Everyone says.
At least I did change! You act like
you're f***ing 18 years old still, Jay!
Grow up, Jay. That's
why he's yelling at you.
You've been holding me
back this whole time!
That means f*** you.
Come on, guys!
Come on!
F*** you,
you piece of sh*t!
Everybody, out!
Craig, stop 'em!
Get apart!
Oh, now it's on.
Yo! What the f***
is all this, Franco?
Uh, looks like food.
How'd that get there?
What?
You have more food?
You knew he had
extra food?
Yeah, he gave me
one cracker.
dick for half a cracker.
All right, well, maybe I didn't
want you to suck my dick, all right?
Look... I didn't want to suck it!
That's the point of what I
said! It was my f***ing food!
Guys, guys,
guys, fire!
Boys, boys, boys...
Sh*t!
Jonah's on fire!
Put it out!
Use your mouth!
Put it out!
Go, go, go, go, go!
Where is he? Where is he?
0 fans
Submitted on August 05, 2018
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"This Is the End" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/this_is_the_end_21800>.
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