This Is the End Page #3

Jonah's the nicest

guy ever, man.

Oh, my God, that's a thin veneer

of kindness.

Nobody's that nice.

Jonah is that nice.

Serial killers

are that nice.

Just answer me

one question.

Is Michael Cera's butthole

as adorable as I pictured?

Oh, for f***'s sake.

I picture it looking

like a little donut,

like a little

pink sprinkled donut.

Oh, it's so

bright in here.

It is f***ing bright.

Oh, I'm so high.

There's so many delicious choices.

What do I do?

I'm gonna get something to drink.

Okay.

Excuse me,

would it be possible

for my daughter to

use your restroom?

She's really got to go.

Read the sign.

Customers only.

Seriously?

Why the f*** you think

I put up the sign?

It's okay, Dad. I can hold it.

Let's just buy something

for your mother.

Yeah, well,

I guess you better, huh?

This cash register lady

is mean.

I have anxiety. Will

you buy this for me?

When I'm stoned,

I can't do this.

I think I'm just gonna

head back to your place.

I'm not really liking it very

much over there at Franco's.

Dude, I want you to get to know

these guys. That's never gonna happen

if you don't put in any

effort whatsoever, okay?

I hate it in there.

I just want to drink some

pop and smoke some weed.

What about...

What about me?

Are you okay?

Are you okay?

Did you just see that?

What the hell?

Oh, my God, Jesus, Jesus! Run, run, run!

This way!

Okay, okay, okay!

Oh, my God!

Oh, oh...

Oh, Jesus.

Run!

Jesus Christ!

Why the f*** did you

bring me down here?

The f***, Seth? I don't

know what's happening!

We're going back to Franco's. Why?

Just run!

Keep running!

Oh, my f***!

We are going

back to Franco's!

Oh, God damn it.

Jesus!

Oh, sh*t!

This way. We're almost

there! We're so close!

Hey, you guys okay?

Are you guys okay?

There was a crazy earthquake.

Did you guys feel that?

That was insane.

F***, no.

We can't feel

anything in here.

This place is

a f***ing fortress.

That wasn't

an earthquake, man.

That was something way

f***ing crazier. No...

What's crazier

than an earthquake?

There were beams of blue

light coming out of the sky

and people getting

sucked up into the sky.

He's on hallucinogens.

Come on, guys. Don't bully

Jay. He's a sweetheart.

Keep going, man. What

are you talking about?

There were people,

and they were there,

and they got

sucked up into the sky.

Jay.

Sucked up into the sky?

Nobody got

sucked up in here.

I got sucked off here.

No, okay, ask Seth.

He was...

You were there.

Tell them.

Seth, what the f***'s

he talking about?

I have no idea what he's

talking about honestly.

Did anybody get

sucked up into the sky?

I didn't see anything.

I don't know what

he's talking about.

You were there with me.

What are you saying?

All those people that were in the store

with us, they just f***ing vanished.

I didn't see blue light

sucking people up in the sky.

You sound crazy, man.

We should just be lucky we're...

It's not over!

It's okay.

Just relax.

Everyone, it's all right. Just a

little tremor. Party's still going.

In-N-Out truck's

coming in 10 minutes.

- Yes.

- Animal style!

Oh, my f***!

- Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!

- Move! Move!

Move, move, move, move!

This place is safe!

This place is not safe!

Craig,

where you going, man?

It's a f***ing earthquake!

F***!

Move, move, move, come on!

Get out of my way. Move, girl!

- Oh, my God, Seth!

- Oh, sh*t!

Seth.

What the f***?

Don't go on the grass,

not everybody on the grass!

What the f***?

Oh, God!

What the f*** is happening? Paul!

What's happening?

All right, everybody,

listen up. Listen up.

Who took my f***ing

cell phone, man?

Martin, empty your pockets! What?

I saw you in the bathroom,

man! Somebody dial my phone!

Shut the f*** up!

It's unbelievable!

It's unacceptable after all the

coke I've wasted on you people.

I've thrown it away.

I didn't take your

f***ing cell phone.

310... Whoa, whoa, whoa! Mike, Mike,

Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike...

My face!

What's happening to me?

What's happening?

Oh, my God!

Oh, sh*t,

that's embarrassing.

Rihanna!

Please give me

your foot!

Oh, my God!

Craig, Craig, help me.

I'm losing my grip!

It's too late for you!

You're already in the hole!

What the f***

are you talking about?

Get the f***

out of my way!

Oh!

Sorry.

Karen!

Seth, come on! Get in

the house! Come on, Seth!

Oh, my God,

I'm gonna die!

Martin!

Oh, sh*t!

Kevin! Kevin!

What the f***?

Geez, get the f***

off me, Aziz!

Ow, ow, ow!

F*** you, Kevin!

Oh, God, no, get your

f***ing hands off me!

Get your f***ing...

No!

Jay, I can't hold on

much longer.

You have to reach out

and grab me. You hear?

Okay, uh, you take my hand,

and I will swing you up.

Are you sure? I'm gonna

give you my whole weight.

I'm gonna reach for you,

all right? Yeah, yeah.

Are you sure

you can do that?

I can grab you

on three.

One, two, three.

All right, buddy.

Now I'm gonna,

I'm gonna swing across.

I got you, buddy.

You're gonna hold

my weight, all of it.

Okay, come on.

You can hold on to my

full weight? I can do it.

I don't want to die.

Okay.

One, two...

Two, three.

No!

No! No!

Oh, man.

F***.

Holy sh*t!

What happened?

Jay, you're alive.

Jay.

Oh, thank God, Jay.

I'm not dead yet.

I told you guys

not to go outside.

What just happened?

Jesus Christ, they are

all f***ing dead.

I told you guys

not to run outside.

You all right?

I tried to save Aziz.

I tried.

You did your best, man.

I love you.

Why the f*** did you

guys run out there?

You know what, James,

can you lower your voice?

You're freaking out Jay!

Maybe I'm a little

freaked out, too!

- He's not as strong as you.

- They all fell in.

- Look at my house!

- I tried to save them. They all fell in.

Get your f***ing hands off me.

Jonah, stop touching me.

Can we get Jay

some water, please?

Can we get him

some hydration?

- He needs to be hydrated.

- The water's not working!

Everyone just

runs out the door!

My phone is dead.

Guys, the f***ing

Internet's not working!

Let's watch the TV.

Let's check the news.

Where is the TV?

It's in the floor.

In the floor?

- Oh, that's dope.

- Yeah, cool, huh?

That's really neat.

That is impressive, James.

The biggest earthquake

to ever hit Los...

Officers urging people

to stay in their homes right now.

And also reports of looting

and rioting

are spreading

across the city.

Riots.

Police are pretty

much outnumbered

as people are

turning to one another.

Martial law has

now been declared.

Air Force One

has gone down...

Sh*t. It's gone, guys.

So I think we should...

I think we should probably

go back to your place, eh?

What are you

talking about, man?

No, no way.

I'm not leaving here.

I don't want to die

at James Franco's house.

You heard the TV.

The TV said stay here.

It said stay in your homes.

We need to stay here until they

start rescuing people, okay?

A huge earthquake happens.

Who do they rescue first?

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