Walk of Fame Page #3

and put away hot and wet.

Okay, it is time

for you to become acquainted

with your fellow numbers.

You will be rehearsing

with them this week.

Que se dice, my brothas!

Now it looks like this group

might have a fighting chance.

Why is that?

Why? Because I'm in it

tinker bell.

Tony Montana, puta, octopus!

Dork!

Well, welcome. We're just trying

to figure out where to meet

to practice our scene.

Do you live close by?

You got a house, don't you?

- Yeah, but...

- Okay, cool. Let's go there.

No. It's not

the kind of place where-

hey, we're going to your house.

The dork, the fairy and I

will see you there.

Uccellini is out.

He just made the bear

touch my penis.

Oh, my god,

you were so amazing, babe.

Like your b*obs were heaving

and your mouth was like,

like pulsing with rage and...

See, I thought

I was the best too.

Your hair is like

so silky and...

- Hi, Nikki.

- Hey.

Hey, just so you know,

stalking is a felony.

Heidi, rude.

- You go here now?

- Yeah.

Gotta go.

Mm!

Help me, mommy!

I'm a big stalker

creepy douchebag!

I can reserve the banquet hall

at my community center.

We'll have plenty

of privacy there.

That's a really good idea, Ruth.

Maybe after we rehearse

a couple of times,

we could have some of your

neighbors was us perform it.

Oh, wait until

the older folks see you.

They're gonna wanna snuggle you

six days from Sunday.

I've wanted you for so long.

But this just feels so wrong.

Shh. Don't think about it.

Just enjoy the fact

that you're about to be

with the best-looking man

in your life.

Uccellini.

Uccellini?

Yeah.

Come here.

Lulu.

I slave away all day

while you stay in my office

and humpy hump?

What, this?

No. We were just

talking is all.

Nothing happen, Lulu.

You shut your mouth, Lele.

Ow, Lulu.

Lulu, stop.

Stop. Listen.

Look, we talked about this,

a guy that looks as good as I do

can't be monogamous forever.

Sometimes I need

something different, you know?

A little strange.

Strange?

And that's why you wanna be

with my twin sister?

You dumb little f***!

Ow! Ow! Okay, okay.

Listen, stop.

What about my headshots?

You dropped your little

gummy worm in the wrong pond.

Now you have no headshots!

Ow! Okay, look, look, look.

Listen, what if I

go to the house,

and we talk about this

when you get home?

You don't have a house anymore,

hotshot.

You just got evicted.

Oh, hello!

Come on in, take a seat.

Lulu, let's talk

one more time, please.

Hey, you know what?

You're the one

that's missing out.

Uccellini! Uhh!

This mind and this body?

She's gonna be

on a wounded knee,

begging this prodigy son

to return.

I think what you're referring to

just happens to be

the story of prodigal son.

It has absolutely nothing to do

with Asian sisters

or wounded knees

or morons in leisure suits

on the f***ing clock.

Hey, step down, old man.

We don't any philigisticsum from

the walnut gallery, all right?

The prodigal son

was ignorant and arrogant.

But he had all the necessary

means for success,

but only after returning home

to the wisdom and guidance

of his father.

You have the roar of a lion,

but a lion who's stuck

in a cold cage,

waiting to be warmed up,

warmed enough so you can

crawl out of your den

and discover your time to kill.

It has all the elements we need:

Greed, passion, anger, jealousy.

I say we go for it.

I'm not doing a scene

from bring it on.

Sounds like a total b*tch fest.

And Rubisio Uccellini

ain't no b*tch.

I say we do a scene

from the godfather.

Actually, I've never seen

the godfather.

That's 'cause you're an idiot.

Oh, that's productive.

Oh, Othello's here.

Of course I'm here.

This is my house.

And it's really nice.

Come on, you guys, why don't we

do a scene from stand by me?

There's four of them,

and there's four of us.

There we go.

That's a start.

Three claps for Rowe.

Those kids are like

eight years old.

I'm not gonna pretend

to be a kid.

Oh, I don't think

you'd have to pretend.

Were they friends with Michael?

No, Hansel.

That was from a monologue.

These are actors

from an acting class.

Hi. Hey, sir.

Uh, I'm Rowe.

I'm sure you are.

And that's my hookah.

Oh, I'm so sorry, i...

What the f***?

Thank you.

Ugh.

I no wanna you go, papa.

That's gonna be on television?

They're performing for us.

You're interrupting.

Well, I hate it.

I want my ticket money back.

I'll miss you like the dickens,

sweetheart.

I love you, papa.

Why is that girl calling

that little boy "daddy"?

Is this some of that

perverted adult smut?

It's a theatrical performance,

you blowhard!

Like a dinner theater?

Like a dinner theater, Lenny.

Well, I'd like

a Salisbury steak.

That tears it! That tears it!

That tears it!

That's the end of it!

The end of it!

Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.

It's not my fault that nobody

wants to hire these rejects.

So tell them that.

Listen here,

you dry humping f***,

you don't tell daddy what

he can and what he can't do.

You know, you do a lot of

talking with your pelvic region.

Where the f*** is chance?

Hey, drew.

Oh, hey, Hannah.

How did it go with your group?

Uh, I wouldn't really know

how to put it into words.

- Hey, drew-hoo.

- Oh, hey, Nikki.

Um, Nikki, this is Hannah.

Hannah, Nikki.

Hey, Nikki.

Um, it's nice to meet you.

Uh, Hannah is in

the other class with me.

Oh. Yeah.

Well, I will see you in there.

Yeah.

Break a leg.

Thank you.

Looks like she broke

more than just a leg.

Poor girl.

She's pretty good, actually.

Yeah, well, she's not a star.

Once you're here for a while,

you'll see.

So what's the difference

between the two classes?

I gotta go.

Unleash the beast!

Okay.

Chance, where the f*** are you?

- Move it or lose it, b*tch!

- Whoa! Jeez!

Oh, please, darling,

won't you reconsider?

I can hardly breathe,

thinking about you

not being here,

laying next to me.

Well, duty calls, sweet cheeks,

and this cowboy don't back down

to anyone or anything.

I no wanna you go, papa.

Uh, now you listen,

and you listen good, son.

While I'm gone,

you're the man of this ranch.

Now, I want you

to feed the chickens

and milk them cows, you hear?

And I want you to make sure

that your mother and sister

are never fondled

by the other cowhands.

I love you, daddy.

Yippee-ki-yay!

Neigh! Neigh!

Action!

Men, I'm gonna ask you

one more time.

Who screwed up my mess hall?

Sir, it was not me, sir.

I didn't even

eat anything last night.

Then you're dismissed, soldier.

Get out of my face!

It wasn't me, sir.

I took an oath to serve this

country and to tell the truth.

As a result,

I can't tell a lie-lie.

Saved by the don't ask,

don't tell clause.

Lieutenant, that's already

been totally amended already.

Ugh.

Back to your bunker!

And you, soldier?

I don't really care what

you have to say for yourself.

You made me question

the validity of basic training.

One of these days, I'm gonna

give you what you deserve.

Really?

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