Walk of Fame Page #6

looming right there

over their heads.

Well, get your umbrellas out.

It's about to rain

a f***ing Oscar!

All right! Scene! Yes!

Beautiful.

All right, guys, well,

everyone...

Important announcement.

Showcase is in one week.

This is a million-dollar

opportunity.

I want you all to contribute

to each other's success,

help each other,

get behind each other,

root for each other.

I want you to tell

all your friends and family.

I want to pack this place

to the rafters.

I wanna really

get the adrenaline flowing.

I want it to be really fantastic

for you guys.

So I want you all

to bring in $50 tomorrow

to help offset my cost

for the showcase, okay?

Sir, $50 is a lot of money

for me to spend right now.

What?

Sorry, did I hear that right?

So you're gonna throw away your

whole career, worth millions,

for a measly $50?

Is that what you're telling

all the class here?

You wanna quit?

No, sir, that's not

what I meant.

You know, I've given up

millions of dollars as an actor.

I've suffered through

four very painful divorces

for your ungrateful asses.

You know, I was offered

the lead in Amadeus.

All right, it was the tour.

I turned it down for my students

because I love them!

And what do you do?

You kick me right in the teeth

for 50 f***ing dollars!

Like your character, rose,

as you were doing it

moments ago,

when you were promising

your young toy boy,

"oh, I'll never let you go!

Woo hoo hoo!

I'll never let you go!

Never let you go!" What?

Then the b*tch lets him go

to the f***ing ocean floor!

Uh, uh...

Grammy no gonna give no money.

No piggy bank, no.

Jesus, take a knife.

Yes.

Besides our scene and the money,

is there anything else

we need to, you know, prepare?

Thank you for asking

an intelligent question.

Yes.

You need to find

the beast inside you,

and you need to

unleash the hell out of it.

You see, this is your one chance

to take Hollywood by storm,

so I want you to get

all your sh*t together,

and I want you to really

blow these people away!

I want you

to blow everyone away.

Come on, people,

unleash your beast!

There! That's it!

That's brilliant!

He's the king!

You have just earned yourself

a lead in the showcase.

Whoo! Uccellini!

He is now your king!

He's in charge!

Evan is outta here!

I'm in charge,

which basically means

I'm the boss.

We'll be meeting here

tomorrow at 7:
00, Capisce?

How about we all decide

what time is best for

the class, fuckface?

Hey, it's been decided.

Be here at 7:
00,

or your little ass

is out of the showcase and

into the urine-filled streets.

Capisce?

Yeah, come in.

Sir, I have a concern

burning in my bosom.

Oh. Well, I have a concern

that you're just one thrust away

from throwing out every disc

in your lower back,

but I'm don't come barging

into your office, now, do I?

They've had less than

one month of training.

Don't you think

it's a little early for them

to be exposed

to producers and agents?

For Pete's sake.

What, their careers?

I'm dealing with, what, autism

and 80-year-olds

drooling on my carpet.

We've got degenerates here.

They're not degenerates.

They're individuals

with hopes and dreams

just like everyone else.

I've even got one that can't

manipulate 50% of her body.

Her name is Hannah.

And she's beautiful

and talented.

So you tell that to the director

of horse whisperer ii

when he calls to say,

"Hannah couldn't hold the reins

of the stunt horse

with one hand."

Do you really think

that's gonna help her career?

- Well, do you?

- Evan!

I don't know what you're saying.

Frankly, I don't care.

This is a very nice scotch.

I'm sitting here

enjoying myself,

so why don't you

take your little cushion

and ram it up your ass?

Yes! I got the part

of the queen.

- That's the lead part.

- Congratulations.

Thank you.

Looks like I got the old

knight in shining armor.

Oh, cool.

Que se dice, my lovely Nikki?

Since you're playing the queen,

you'll have more lines with me

than anyone else.

Really? Why is that?

I don't know, Juliet.

Who do you think would be

the logical philigistic

for the queen

to have conversilagism?

- That's not even a word.

- A king.

Well, I'm a knight

in shining armor,

and I'd take that any day

over being an ignorant,

uneducated, lazy king.

Oh, my god, guys, please.

That's perfect.

Then why don't you make like the

cute little knight that you are

and find something to do

with your time, my brotha?

Because the king and the queen

have a lot of work to do.

Come on, Nikki.

Uccellini!

Motherf***er.

- Hey.

- Hey, Hannah.

- You did a great job tonight.

- Thanks.

I'll catch up with you

later, okay?

Are you okay, drew?

Yup. Top of the world.

En garde!

Not today, Hansel.

The lover's identity

has been resurrected.

Where'd you get Nikki's ID?

She's probably gonna need this.

I should probably

take it back to her, right?

Ooh, yeah.

Oh! Now your ass

a little bit.

- Uh-huh.

- Yeah.

Now look at me

and say, "Uccellini."

Uccellini.

God, you're so good.

Oh, baby, put your leg up

on the couch right there.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Ooh.

Damn, that looks good.

Oh! Move the robe

a little bit.

Why?

What?

Just move the robe.

Yeah. Ooh.

The shoulder, I like it.

Hey, people.

People.

Hey! Shut up!

The director's talking.

Shouldn't we wait for Nikki

to get here?

Nikki's gonna be a little late.

Really?

Why is that, Rubisio?

Sorry. Hi. What's up?

I don't know, Nikki.

Why don't you tell me?

I thought you weren't

that type of girl.

I can't do this.

I'm done.

Hey, where you going?

Drew, don't bail on us.

We need you.

Yeah, I thought we were

all in this together.

Where you going?

Okay. The only reason I joined

this class is to bang her.

Apparently, she's a whore.

For the rest of you,

granny, what are you,

90 years old?

Wake up.

And you?

You can barely

complete a sentence.

Talking to you is like

dealing with a crack baby.

I don't wanna say not no drugs.

And what,

a fashion designer and a geek

take over

the entertainment business?

And you, little guy,

I don't know

if you got the memo,

but they already

shot the movie Willow.

Yeah. You're about

20 years too late.

You might wanna see if Santa's

still hiring for the season.

Check that out.

Oh, with your pterodactyl arms...

Uhh, uhh...

Who's my b*tch now?

- Hey, drew?

- What?

Go f*** yourself.

Starmaker academy's a joke.

We're all bigger jokes

for being here.

Oh, and everybody knows

you're not Italian.

Yes, I am.

I am Italian. Nikki?

Give it up.

Guys, what the f***

is wrong with...

Sounds like that little Betty

did you dirty, bro.

Another dude

in the same week, huh?

That's why I hit and quit.

No emotions involved, my friend.

Hey, can I get you

something to drink?

Oh, sh*t.

You again, huh?

Well, yes.

I'll have a cabernet Sauvignon.

- Vodka, please, double.

- Okay.

You know, Nate,

it'd be one thing

if she hooked up

with another guy.

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